Love That Shouldn't Have Happened
by SummerLove25
Summary: He was the bad party boy&she was his best friends sweet innocent sister. He wasn't supposed to fall for her but he did&he messed it all up. She moved away for college and has been very happy, now a year later big brother is visiting but he isn't alone.
1. The Easy Part'

**This is my new story. It is completely AU but I hope you all like it. The lyrics are The Easy Part by Chuck Wicks and I don't own anything.**

**:D**

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_Sometimes love ain't enough__  
__And there's times__  
__When just givin up is alright__  
__No matter how much you want it to work__  
__Someone's gonna get hurt_

"_Brooke I'm sorry!" Lucas yelled for about the 20__th__ time since he walked in his girlfriend's room. He messed up, he did. He was drunk and stupid and made a mistake but she had to forgive him, she had to know he loved her and wanted to fix things._

"_Lucas I believe your sorry but I don't think you regret it. I think the only thing you regret is me finding out!" Brooke hissed as she franticly moved around her room not wanting to stop because she knew if she did he would grab her. He would hold onto her and if that happened he might try to kiss her and if he did then she was more than sure she would be screwed, "I thought you changed. I wanted to believe you changed!"_

"_I did change." He told her walking over and grabbing her making her tense in his hands, "Baby you know I changed for you. I did." She had to know he was different he was better. Maybe once he was for the drinking and sleeping around, but after he met Brooke he changed. He fell for the brunette hard and soon he was doing things that weren't him. He stayed in on Friday nights curled up on the couch with her instead of out getting smashed with his friends. He would stay on the phone with her for hours at night talking about most the time nothing and he even waited months before he slept with her which wasn't at all like him._

_He never thought him and Brooke would ever become something serious but something happened, at first the fun just flirting turned into something so much more and because of it he fell in love with her, he changed for her. He changed for the better and with one night, one night of being completely stupid changed it all and it seemed like all the progress he made, all the changing he had done meant nothing, was for nothing._

"_I don't know anything anymore Lucas! But one thing I do know is I want you to leave me the hell alone!" she snapped yanking out of his arms and moving to her bathroom but he was behind her before the door slammed._

"_I love you Brooke. I don't know what else to say other then I love you." he sighed taking her hand in his and brushing her hair behind her ear, "I made a mistake. God it was the worst mistake I have ever made please, baby please know I love you, please believe me." he begged but she just closed her eyes as tears fell fast from her eyes._

_This wasn't supposed to happen, she was ok with being closed off to people, not wanting people to know her, know things about her but Lucas wouldn't let it go. He was around, they talked a lot and though at first she thought it was just innocent fun turned into something she thought was love. _

_She gave everything to this boy, even though he changed for her a lot she changed for him too. She changed herself and in some ways molded herself to become someone who was she thought good enough for him but she was wrong. She was better than him, she is better than him._

"_If you loved me Lucas you wouldn't have had sex with her." Brooke frowns as a tear falls and not yelling anymore because she doesn't want to fight, she doesn't want to argue with him she just wants him to leave her alone._

"_I love you Brooke." He whispers leaning in and kissing her softly on her lips and tasting her strawberry lip gloss along with the taste of her tears. She didn't fight him at first and when he moved his hand behind her back pulling her into him he thought it was going to be ok. That even if they had a lot to work through they were going to be ok, she was going to forgive him and they were going to work this out._

_But when she pulled back from him, she gave him a look he had never seen before from her. Her once hazel eyes that use to be full of so much love for him, so much life was replace with a dark pained look and when she looked at him with no emotion standing calm in front of him and whispering, "I don't." he broke._

_Sometimes it ain't about who's wrong__  
__And as bad as you want to hold on__  
__The right thing to do is to get out__  
__Right now__  
__Before it's too late_

Brooke's eyes flew open rolling over in her bed seeing it was 3 in the morning and for about the 8th time that week had the same dream. Yet it wasn't a dream, it was reality, it happened. She dated Lucas they broke up she died a little inside. Pretty much how it went. Even when dating, even in the good times she felt like she always had to prove she deserved to be with him.

Lucas wasn't supposed to happen; she wasn't expecting him to happen. But her brother just had to come home from school and bring his damn best friend Lucas with him and she quickly fell for him, she didn't want to. She knew he was bad news everyone knew it even her brother told her he loved his best friend but she could do so much better, he didn't trust her with him, but she did it anyway.

She let herself fall for him, and she fell hard. She will admit she loved him, they dated almost a year and she loved him but she believes it was more of a young teenage romance. She was 19 and he was 23, he was fun and exciting and for awhile thought he saw her as Cam's little sister, but then the fun flirting, the fun laughing and joking turned into something else.

One night they were out and just at some club all hanging out her brother somewhere around with his other friends and he kissed her. They were dancing, they were laughing and when she spun in his arms to look at him he smiled and kissed her.

_Yea the hardest part of leaving__  
__Is picking up the keys__  
__And finding the nerve to start that car__  
__The first night is the longest__  
__You're waking up alone__  
__And you find out how strong you really are__  
__But the rest is the easy part_

_~Flashback_

"_Ok Broody I am bored Cam is off somewhere trying to get lucky with some poor girl and I am sure Jason and Matt are doing the same so you get the pleasure of dancing with me." Brooke smiled jumping off her stool and reaching for Lucas's hand._

"_Well that was such a nice way to ask someone to dance. Pshh..." Lucas pretended to frown making Brooke laugh, "To think you just want to dance with me because no one else is around. I am truly hurt Brooke."_

"_Oh I am sorry did I bruise you ego?" she teased and he pouted and just nodded yes, "Ok how about this." she paused brushing a piece of hair back and pretended to turn all love struck "Lucas you are so amazingly gorgeous I am sure every girl in her wants to dance with you but I am hoping, no pleading that you will give me the honor and dance with me." Brooke pretended to beg making Lucas smile._

"_Well I don't know now you just seem to clinging." He jokes making her roll her eyes._

"_Get your ass up." Brooke laughed grabbing his hand dragging him to the dance floor then turning herself in his arms and grinding up against him. His hands were placed on her hips and she placed her hands on top of his leaning back into him as they both moved to the music._

_Brooke felt him nuzzle his head in her hair and neck and got some goosebumps feeling his warm breath on her neck. She swears for a second she felt him kiss her neck but just ignored it thinking she just drank some and was imagining it._

"_You smell really good." Lucas whispered in her ear and Brooke spun around in his arms smiling at him._

"_Thanks." She smiled draping her arms loosely around his neck as they still moved together and completely missing his eyes casting a glance at her lips._

"_You're really beautiful you know that?" he whispered pulling her closer to him and they started to dance a little slower and closer than the song that was playing was made for. _

"_Umm…thanks." Brooke blushed looking away for a second then back at him and suddenly felt his hand trembling on her side making her not really sure what was going on until he started to lean closer to her, "Luke what are you…" she started to ask but got cut off my his lips slowly pushing against hers. _

_It was short and sweet and took her completely by surprised but when he pulled away she just looked at him. She stood stunned and when she said nothing she heard him mumble "sorry" and walk away._

_Brooke stood stunned for all of ten seconds until she realized he wasn't in front of her anymore and walking somewhere else. She never thought she liked Lucas, she didn't think she really felt anything until his lips touched hers and then she got like a shot of electricity take over and she quickly realized something was there. So she followed him, she chased him to the back of the club where the music was quieter and they were alone. _

"_Lucas what the hell was that?" She demanded him to tell her. What made him do that because she sure as hell didn't kiss him first._

"_I don't know, I just got this feeling and I just let it happen. Without even thinking I just let it happened and if you want me to apologize for it I won't." He told her quickly and Brooke just looked at him "I have had this feeling for awhile and I kissed you because I saw a chance and took it. I have been thinking about doing it all night so I did it."_

_Again she stood frozen and when he went to kiss her again she smelled the alcohol on his breath and took a step back "Lucas your drunk." She claimed feeling that was the only reason he was doing any of this "You are drunk and need someone for the night and that girl won't be me." She tries to tell him but with a small grin and laugh he shook his head no._

"_One I am not drunk and two…" he whispered taking a step closer to her as she leaned up against the wall him placing his hand over her shoulder leaning insanely close to her face, "And two I am more than sure if I wanted someone for the night I could find one. I wouldn't be here in this dark corner with you wanting to kiss you. With someone I know I wouldn't get any from tonight even if I wanted it." He whispers as his hand starts to play with rim of her shirt and he started to rub the small bit of skin of hers that was showing._

"_Your right you won't get any from me." she breathed out not even sure if her words were that convincing since she herself didn't really believe them._

"_I'm not trying to sleep with you Brooke." He smiles leaning in and kiss her neck softly._

"_Then what are you trying to do?" Brooke gasped out as he pulled back smiling at her, making her feel nervous._

"_Just trying to kiss you." he grinned and before she could object to the kiss he kissed her again and Brooke felt Lucas's tongue darted in her mouth. Stunned, that was a good word to describe it all but when his hand ran down her body placing on her hip and pushing her hard against the wall, stunned turned into happy and happy turned into want as she let herself give into him. _

_~Flashback Over_

_Before long__  
__The phone's gonna ring__  
__And you'll want__  
__To answer his call__  
__But, girl don't__  
__Have the same conversation over and over__  
__So let it be over_

"Stop it Brooke!" She ordered herself shaking her head of his thoughts. A year she hasn't had that dream, she has forced herself not to think about him but the last few nights the brooding blonde has incased her thoughts.

He called her pretty much every day after they broke up and if he didn't call her, he text her. But she refused to have that talk again, the I am sorry I love you please forgive him talk. Because she wasn't going to and after months of convincing him of that he stopped.

They are over now she knows they are and is happy she is really happy, for almost 6 months she has been dating this guy name Adam and he made her happy. He treated her right and was an amazing boyfriend. They met in one of her English classes and she really does care a lot for the boy who has pretty much made her forget all about Lucas Scott.

But she does have moments of thinking about him, she does because he broke her heart, he cheated on her and then claimed he loved her but she just tries to ignore it.

They made up they are civil, not so much friends but can get along, yet she is nervous. For almost over a year she hasn't seen him but for the next month or so he is going to be staying with her, in her apartment and she is freaking the hell out.

Cam is coming to visit which makes her happy because she has missed her big brother so much since she moved but he is bringing Lucas. He is bringing Lucas and Matt and then Jason which she is happy to see them but not so much about Lucas living in her house. Not that she doesn't think she can resist him or something because she is completely over him, completely but doesn't want it to be weird with her ex boyfriend around her current boyfriend.

_There's an open road__  
__There's a life ahead__  
__But even thought you can't see it yet__  
__Ooo, just take a chance__  
__Pick up your keys__  
__Oh and find the nerve__  
__Yea to start your car__  
__The rest is the easy part_

She doesn't know what Lucas feels for her, she has no clue but she doesn't want him to ruining things with Adam and truth is she doesn't want to hurt Lucas. Even if he did cheat on her, break her she still cared for him, a part of her always will feel something towards him. He was her first love, the first guy she ever gave her heart to and also the first guy she gave her body to. She gave everything about herself to him and it just hurts he threw it all away for a blonde slut in a short dress.

But there is good news about this trip, well great news and that is Rachel is coming. Her best friend and Cam's girlfriend and she is so unbelievably excited about that. So for now she will try to forget about the pain of Lucas Scott and him coming to see her and clean up her apartment, because she is fine she is over him.

She moved to Miami Florida for school last year and has an apartment that overlooks the ocean. Though she loves her life, she loves her home and everything she has right now it was hard to leave. It was hard to pick up everything and leave but she did it and she found it was easier then she thought. You just pick up your keys get in your car and go because life goes on; even when you feel like you're dying inside life always goes on.

_Yea the hardest part of leaving__  
__Is picking up the keys__  
__And finding the nerve to start that car__  
__The first night is the longest__  
__You're waking up alone__  
__And you find out how strong you really are__  
__But the rest is the easy part__  
__The rest is the easy part_

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**Review let me know if ya'll want more :D**


	2. What If You Stay?

**AN: So I am dumb I admit I called her boyfriend Keith. What was I thinking after I went and read it again (after posting it.) I saw that and thought only of Uncle Keith. It was my fault I needed a name and I was listening to a song by someone named Keith. So now her boyfriend is Adam. I redid it in the last chapter so yeah.**

**Anyways thanks all for the reviews they were great and I really enjoyed them. And also thanks for all the story alerts there was a ton and I felt special haha You are all great and I hope you enjoy this story along with my other two. So I will stop rambling like a dork and let you read the story.**

**:D**

**P.S. More rambling, as always I own nothing sadly :( *tear***

**But the song is What If You Stay Chuck Wicks**

**The show is One Tree Hill duh **

**And I also Quinn and Clay have become my new Brucas. Honestly I only watch this new season for them because for some reason I am like completely loving them.**

**But again I digress read and review please.**

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_I can't make you turn around__  
__And I can't take back what I did__  
__I wouldn't blame you if you hated me_

"_Whatcha thinking about?" Brooke asks as she lies in the arms of her boyfriend tracing circles on his bare chest. They have been together for three months, three really great months and that even surprised them. They weren't the couple that was supposed to happen because they were so completely different but they seem to work. They seemed to fit each other. _

"_I love you." Lucas blurts out and sees his girlfriend jump up pulling his bed sheet closer to her staring at him in shock._

"_What?" she asked staring at him not believing she heard him right because he couldn't have just said he loved her; that was impossible. Wasn't it? I mean she wanted to believe she changed him for the better, that he become something better and grew up but there was still a part of her that thought he was going to mess up. And sadly she was waiting for that moment, the one where she realized everything that had happened between the two of them was nothing she thought it was. And him saying I love you would just make her realize that this was real, that he had changed and that someone like him fell for someone like her. _

_That Brooke Davis somehow tamed the all might Lucas Scott._

"_I said I love you." he repeats and again it freaks her out how easily he said it. Was there fear in his voice? Definitely. She is more than sure she heard all the nerves in his words but still he said them. He said them twice and like an idiot she is just staring at him._

"_Please say something." he asked because he felt pretty dumb right now. He just told his girlfriend he loved her and she is staring at him, doesn't make you feel too great. _

"_You don't have to say that Lucas." Brooke somewhat frowns looking away from him missing his confused look, "I mean just because we slept together doesn't mean I expected you to say you love me. I didn't let this happen so I would hear you tell me that. So if you feel you have to say it because we had sex for the first time; don't because you don't have to. I don't expect it and.."_

"_Brooke…" he laughs kissing her to stop her rambling, "I love you." he repeats pulling out of their kiss with a smile, "And not because we had sex and not because I feel like since I took your virginity that I must say something. I said it because I do love you. I wanted to tell you before but I didn't want you thinking I was saying it to get you to sleep with me. And I almost said it during but then I didn't want you to think I said it because it was in the moment. So I guess I just thought since we have slept together and since we aren't having sex right now that you would actually believe it." He explains but again Brooke stays quiet, "But since your just sitting there I am guessing you don't believe me. Huh?" he frowns._

"_No. No it's not that I just… I just don't get why?" _

"_Why I said it?"_

"_No why you love me. I mean Lucas I never really thought you were the type to love someone." Brooke confesses and feels a little guilty by it when she sees the hurt look on his face, "I didn't mean it like that… I mean I meant…ok…that came out wrong." She tries to back track but he just shakes his head._

"_No I know what you mean." he nods "I never thought I would love someone. But I never thought I would do a lot of things I have done with you." he tells her and see just looks at him confused, "Brooke you weren't supposed to happen. We weren't supposed to happen."_

"_Wow that makes me feel good." Brooke sighs pulling back from him and falling back on the bed._

"_No I didn't mean that in a bad way." He says with a small laugh flipping over so he is laying on top of her and brushing a piece of hair behind her ear, "It's just when we first met did you ever think this would have happened?"_

"_Honestly no," she agrees stroking his cheek and smiling at him, "When I first saw you of course I thought you were gorgeous but I thought to you I was Cam baby sister. You saw me like Jason and Matt saw me and truth is I saw you just as my big brothers best friend. I didn't think of you in that way at first."_

"_Same here I never thought about you like that. I mean when I first saw you I thought damn Cam's sister is hot…" he chuckles making Brooke laugh and even blush some, "But I knew he would kill me if I even tried, because well he knew how I was. No reason hiding it I was pretty much an asshole man whore that went after everything in a skirt."_

"_Good thing I wore jeans then." Brooke teases kinking her eyebrow at him making him laugh._

"_I guess so." He whispered back, "But then…"_

"_Then what?"_

"_Ok remember that night we went out on your birthday this year."_

"_Yeah I remember it was my birthday." Brooke says in a duh tone._

"_Yeah right I know but ok so we were all sitting there and we were laughing and joking about I don't even remember but then you looked at me." he smiles thinking about it " I can't explain the look because I really don't know how but it was a look no one ever gave me before. And I tried to ignore it, but then you were seeing that Chase guy and he asked you to dance and the whole I time I watched him dance with you; his hands on you. I got this feeling this feeling I really didn't like."_

"_What was the feeling?" Brooke asked feeling she already knows but just wanting him to tell her anyway._

"_I was jealous as hell." He confesses with a small laugh, "But again I tried to ignore it. I thought this is Cam's sister, his sweet innocent sister and I shouldn't be looking at her like this I shouldn't be feeling like this for her. But then ya'll were dancing and you looked at me again the same look and I just knew."_

"_Knew what?"_

"_That I wanted you."_

"_Luke…" she smiled cupping his cheek and stroking the corner of his mouth._

"_Matt smacked my arm and told me to stop looking at you like that before Cam saw it. So I looked away but I still felt it. I knew how wrong it was to feel that for you and I knew that I had to be different for you but I knew I wanted you. I also knew your brother would never let me get near you so I just had to hang out with ya'll hide all the feelings and watch you with Chase until I hoped you would feel something too. And then when ya'll broke up and I waited like I should because I knew you were upset but then that night we were out and we were dancing and I went for it. I was scared as hell to but I did it and I am glad I did."_

"_Yeah me too." She smiles a smile a mile long as she leaned up kissing him._

"_So ask me again why I love you."_

"_Why do you love me?" she repeats with a small giggle making him smile again._

"_Because you Brooke Davis scare the hell out of me. You make me do things I would never do and say things I would never say. You make me think before I do something because my first thought is, would doing this make me lose the most amazing person I have known. If the answer to that question is yes or even maybe I stop myself, because the thought of losing you just would completely kill me. I never thought I would fall in love with you and I never thought I would change to where I would rather be with one girl all the time and make love to one girl all the time but I did. I fell hard and fast and though that scares me, though it all makes me nervous as hell; knowing you has made me a better person and I just can't help it. I am completely in love with you Brooke Davis. "_

_Brooke smiles at him, at his little speech and at his smile. She smiles at his nervousness and how his hand is actually shaking more on her side now then earlier when she told him she was ready to sleep with him. She smiled at it all and she couldn't help but lean up kissing him ever so gently before pulling back smiling then whispering, "I love you too."_

_Before you slam that open door__  
__And throw away four good years__  
__Think of everything we used to be__  
__I know you say that you're over me__  
__But I'm askin you, beggin you not to leave__  
_

"Lucas!" Cam yells for about the millionth time smacking his best friend next to him.

"Damn dude what the hell." Lucas growls shifting in his chair and shaking his head of all his thoughts.

"Dude I have been yelling your name for about 10 minutes."

"Sorry I guess…I guess I just feel asleep for a sec but I am up what's up?" he asked blink a few times and moving a little more waking himself up completely.

"Well I was going to ask if you want to start driving but if you're tired it's all good." Cam shrugged as he looked over his shoulder before changing lanes and thanking he is almost to his sister's house so he can finally get out of this damn car.

"No man its fine I can drive." Lucas says rubbing the rest of his tiredness out of his eyes and waving him over to the gas station so they can fill up one last time and get something to munch on.

Cam gets out to fill up the car with gas and Lucas gets out going inside to get a drink and something to eat as everyone else sleeps in the car. He grabs a coke and then walks over to the chip aisle and again smiles looking down at all the assortment of food but of course grabs the one thing that makes him think of her.

"_Broody they are my favorite and I am totally craving some BBQ chips please." Brooke begs as her and Lucas follow her brother, Rachel and friends up to Rachel's cabin. She is for about the millionth time starving and wanting Lucas to stop again to get her something even if it's just chips, it amazes Lucas how his girlfriend is all of maybe 115 pounds but eats like no one's business._

"_Baby I know but if we stop now then they will get ahead of us making us completely lost." Lucas says looking over at her pouting next to him then back at the road laughing._

"_Well I know how to get there. I have been there many times." Brooke smiles thinking maybe that would help but nope he just shakes his head, "Please! I am so so hungry."_

"_Babe you just ate." He says but she just lets out a huff falling back in her seat. "Pretty Girl you are 19 aren't you a little old for pouting."_

"_Probably so but babe I am still so hungry please." she pleaded but again he just shook his head. She sat there a second before getting a devilish grin and leaning over in her seat, "You know if you do this little thing for me," she whispers kissing his neck softly and grins when she feel him swallow hard, "Then I will do a little something for you many times this weekend." She lets her raspy voice ring through his ears as she bits hit earlobe and runs her hand up his leg._

"_Many times?" he grins looking over at her and she just nods as she starts kissing his neck again._

"_Anytime you want." she whispers._

"_Anytime I want huh?" he asks and she just nods again and feels like she won when she felt the car pull into a parking lot._

"_Hmm…" Brooke squealed when Lucas pulled her in his lap kissing her hard and deep, "Luke…" she giggles as he runs his hand down her stomach playing with her jeans button as he starts kissing her neck. "Broody we shouldn't…" she starts but completely loses her words when he starts sucking hard on her neck, "God Luke…" _

"_Shouldn't what?" he asks pulling off her neck and kissing her hard on the lips again and letting his hand slowly run down her body and slipping it in the front of her jeans and slowly slipping one finger in her then two making her whole body tingle._

"_God Baby…" she moaned resting her hands on his shoulders moving her hip up and down and making his hand move faster in her._

"_Tell me what you were going to say." He teased stop moving and feeling her whole body tighten around him. _

"_Come on Luke don't do that to me." she begged hating when he teased her like that. Making her want him just to stop._

"_Tell me what we shouldn't do?" he smirked kissing her neck._

"_We shouldn't do this here but I don't care anymore. I want you." she begged pulling him in and kissing him hard._

"_More than those damn chips." He smirked in their kiss and she bit down on his lip making him groan but was pleased with herself since he was being mean teasing her like that but of course mumbling back, "So much more." _

"Luke where you at man?" Matt asked waving his hand in front of his friend face.

"Oh what?" Lucas asked shaking his head of all thoughts and coming out of his daze.

"Man where you at? You seem like a million miles away." Matt laughed grabbing some food and heading to the counter.

"That's because I am." he groaned tossing the chips down and walking over to his friend.

"You not hungry?" Matt asked noticing him glancing at food just a second ago.

"No…" he shrugged putting down his coke and grabbing his wallet, "Not anymore."

_What if I told you I've changed__  
__Would you still walk away__  
__What if I told you I loved you__  
__Would you say that it's too late__  
__What if you could feel what I feel__  
__When I watch you slowly drift away__  
__What if you're wrong__  
__What if I'm right__  
__That you could move on__  
__What if you stay_

"You're ok with everything right Luke?" Jason asks as the once again drive down to Brooke's apartment only about half an hour away now.

"Yeah why wouldn't I be?" Lucas questioned tossing a glance in the rearview mirror at his best friend then looking back at the road.

"I don't know just thought it might be weird since you know you and Brooke…" he trails off not sure really how to go about that topic. They all know how hard this must be for him since none of them really believe he is actually over the brunette in question.

"All we are saying is we know if it uncomfortable and maybe even hard for you." Matt says helping out what his best friend was trying to say.

"Why would you think it would be hard?" Lucas shrugged trying to act like it was no big deal and that he really didn't care anymore.

"I don't know maybe because she dumped your sorry ass." Rachel growl popping up from lying in the back seat to look at them, "Remember that you cheated on her and she dumped you."

"Rach…" Cam said looking at his girlfriend hoping she would stop this talk now.

"No! Everyone in this car is thinking poor Lucas but did we all forget what happened?" Rachel asked looking around at everyone in the car, "Did we all forget that he was the one who cheated and he was the one who broke her heart."

"Rachel stop." Cam tried again noticing how his best friend gripped the steering wheel so tight his knuckles turned white.

"No. Brooke is my best friend if you should feel bad for anyone it should be her. Hell Cam she is your damn sister." Rachel argued annoyed, Lucas messed up he did. He screwed around on Brooke broke her and Rachel had to sit and watch her best friend shatter in front of her so she wasn't going to feel bad for Lucas, not at all.

"She is and she is fine with all of us coming down here. She is fine with Lucas coming so you should be fine with it." Cam explained, "It is in the past and everyone is over it so why won't you just leave it be?"

"Because if he didn't cheat on her she wouldn't have left. She would still be in Tree Hill with the rest of us and I wouldn't have lost my best friend!" Rachel snapped.

"Damn it Rachel she didn't leave because of me!" Lucas finally snapped slamming his hand hard on the steering wheel.

"Yeah right you keep telling yourself that." Rachel mumbled falling back in the seat and prepared to ignore everyone the rest of the car ride.

"Luke you know that's not true." Matt tried to reassure patting his friend on the shoulder who just nodded as he stared at the long road in front of him.

_I know right now it's hard to breathe__  
__Hard to think and hard to see__  
__All the reasons we should work it out__  
__It might be easier to go,__  
__But if you walk out, you'll never know__  
__How strong we could be at the end of this__  
__I know that sorry is not enough__  
__But I'll do everything, anything to make it up_

"_Don't go." Lucas said walking in to find his girlfriend, well ex girlfriend packing her bags._

"_Lucas what are you doing here?" Brooke asked looking at him wishing to everything he wasn't here. Knowing this was hard enough without him here begging her to stay. They have been broken up for all of 3 months and it has been the longest and worst 3 months of her life. She finally decided to go off to school but now him being here was going to make it some much harder._

"_Please don't leave." He begged walking over to her taking her hand in his, "I don't want you to leave. I don't want you to move please don't go."_

"_I'm leaving Lucas." She told him slipping her hands out of his and loading up another one of her boxes._

"_But I can't know you are leaving because you are trying to get away from me. That you are leaving everything here because you hate me so much."_

"_Lucas I am leaving because of you I am leaving because I don't want to be stuck in Tree Hill my whole life. I was planning on going away to school long before you. If anything you are the reason I stayed here longer then I planned." She confessed but not looking at him as she did. Not turning to face him just keeping her back to him cursing the tears burning in her eyes._

"_Then let me be that reason again please." he pleaded but saw her shake her head no at him. "Brooke…" he sighed walking over to her and wrapping his arms around her from behind and felt her let out a small sob in his arms, "Baby please don't cry." He whispered nuzzling his head in her neck as she fell back into him their first form of real contact in months, "I will change. Please I can change again. I will fix things if you just let me."_

"_Lucas you won't change." She cried trying to wiggle out of his arms but he just yanked her hard back into him._

"_Yes!" he argued, "Yes I will. If you give me the chance I will change I will make things better. If you give me a second chance I will never hurt you again. God baby I promise I will never hurt you again." He tried to tell her but she just shook her head no so he spun her around in his arms kissing her. Kissing her and again tasting her tears and cursing himself for being the cause of them. He slowly and sadly pulled away from their kiss leaning his forehead against hers as she continued to cry, "I love you so much Brooke. I don't want to lose you."_

_But again she just shook her head at him and whispering "You already lost me Lucas."_

_What if I told you I've changed__  
__Would you still walk away__  
__What if I told you I loved you__  
__Would you say that it's too late__  
__What if you could feel what I feel__  
__When I watch you slowly drift away__  
__What if you're wrong__  
__What if I'm right__  
__That you could move on__  
__What if you stay_

Lucas again pulls himself out of his thoughts and he cursed himself for letting him think of Brooke so much the last few days. After lots of convincing and lots of pleading his friends talked him in to coming but since he heard they were staying with Brooke all he has done is think about her. Wonder if she misses him because he knows he still missed the hell out of her.

"Hey turn the radio down I'm calling Brookie." Rachel told them and Lucas turned the dial and tensed up as he got off the last exit for Brooke's house.

"_Hello?_" _Brooke giggled into the phone as she laid on her sofa with her boyfriend kissing her._

"Well hello skank what are you up to?" Rachel asked looking up and smirked when she noticed Lucas tossing glance at her from the front.

"_Umm…nothing._" _Brooke shrugged pushing her boyfriend away, "Babe stop I'm on the phone." She smiled but he just leaned in kissing her again. _

"_Baby please hang up." _Rachel heard a deep voice ask and started to laugh, "Brooke Penelope Davis did you answer your phone while having sex?!"

"What!?" Cam, Matt, Jason and Lucas all said at the same time. As Lucas slammed on the breaks and they all turned to look at Rachel in the back laughing. Cam, Matt and Jason meaning it in they don't like their baby sister having sex way as Lucas's was clearly jealousy that made Rachel laugh even harder.

"Tell her she better not be having sex when I get there or I swear to god I will kick that guys ass." Cam said in his whole over protective brother voice.

"Oh baby shut up if anyone's ass should be kicked for having sex with your sister it should be your best friend sitting right next to you." Rachel says with an eye roll as they continue down the road, "Oh Brooke he sounds good maybe I should hang up and let you finish." She teases and really loves the look Lucas has right now.

"_Rachel I am not having sex._" _Brooke squeals in the phone._

"_Well I mean I was trying to until you answered your phone." _Rachel heard the same deep voice groan and then heard some moving around until Brooke came back on.

"_Sorry Rach just Adam I don't know what has gotten into him today._" _Brooke teased as her boyfriend rolled his eyes climbing of the couch and walking into Brooke's kitchen._

"Oh I am all for fun random sex on couches just ask your brother._" _Rachel smirks looking at her boyfriend who winked at her.

"_God Rachel don't talk to me about having sex with my brother that makes me sick._" _Brooke gags._

"Sorry but tell me more about this little lover of yours?" Rachel asked already knowing a lot about him but kind of liking having this talk in front of Lucas.

"_Well let's see he has dark hair. It's so dark its almost black._" _Brooke starts looking at her boyfriend moving around in her kitchen, "he has a little scruff on his face that sometimes get to long so I make him shave it down. Then his eyes Rachel, they are the most amazing green."_

"Oh I love dark hair and green eyes._" _Rachel agrees and sees Lucas frown in the front seat. "So tell me about his body?"

"_Well he is tan, not fake dark leathery tan but gorgeous model tan. And his body is so amazing. He plays baseball at my college and he has the best body on the team I think but I think I may also be a little bias._"

"Oh you are completely bias but its ok you are in love so its ok to be bias about your hot boyfriends body." Rachel smirks and again sees Lucas look away from the road at her, "So Brookie are you? Are you in love?" She asks and sees Lucas hold his breath and ears perk up.

"_Yeah Rach, I am._" _Brooke smiles thinking about it as Adam winks at her in the kitchen, "I never thought I would fall in love again. I mean I wasn't going to let myself fall in love because last time it was just so bad but then I met Adam and I don't know he just made me fall hard and fast. I am really in love with him."_

"Brooke that is so great I am glad you found love. And I can't wait to meet the boy that mended your heart and helped you fall in love for real." Rachel says a little loud so the whole are hears her and for a second, for a second she almost feels bad because she can almost see Lucas's whole world shatter, his entire heart break in front of her. But when she feels that small guilty she thinks of her best friend crying on her shoulder and ignores it.

"_Rach.._" _Brooke asks looking up to see where Adam is then getting up and walking into her bedroom shutting the door falling on her bed. "Is he with you?"_

"Umm..yup." Rachel said looking up at the boys then laying back on the back seat not wanting them to hear this part.

"_How is he?_" _She ask and grows angry with herself for tearing up again. A year has passed since their break up and it still makes her cry. What's wrong with her?_

"Do you want my honest answer or lie?" Rachel asked reaching her hand up for the little button so she can control the radio and turning it up so the boys can't hear her.

"_I want…_"_ Brooke trails off debating what answer will make her feel better, "I don't know what one I want."_

"He is great." Rachel lies, "Never better. I think he is so happy him and Adam will become best friends."

"_Thanks for trying to lie._"

"I'm sorry B. Do you still miss him?" Rachel asked feeling she already knew the answer.

"_Do you want my honest answer or lie?_"

"The one you want me to know."

"_Not at all._"_ Brooke lied._

"It's ok Brooke. It's ok to miss him."

"_No its really not. I have Adam who is so amazing to me. He is great I know I love him but then there is like a part of me that will always miss Lucas. And I don't know if its I miss him or I want him to miss me. Like I want him to regret everything and I don't know maybe pine for me, feel the pain I felt a little._"

"Well…" Rachel says sitting up and looking at the boy in question who is looking like a lost puppy staring emotionless out the window as we drive, "If that's what you want you definitely got it."

He felt sick. Lucas felt sick listening to Rachel talk to Brooke about some guy. Some guy she loved and made her so very happy. He thought he was better, all over it and them but truth is he really wasn't. It killed him to think how bad he hurt someone he once loved so much but what killed him more was thinking about how she moved on. She was happy with someone else and that someone wasn't him. He wanted her happy, he wanted her to get everything she wanted but that didn't change the fact a small piece of him, a small piece want her to be happy with him again. That maybe this trip would fix things or something. But after hearing Rachel talking to her that hope was out the window and he realized he just had to accept the fact he lost her. She was gone and so was his second chance.

_I can't make you turn around__  
__And I can't take back what I did__  
__I wouldn't blame you if you hated me_

* * *

**So how much do you love my fast update?**

**Oh come on I know you love me a little haha**

**Well take that love and make it last awhile because my next update may not be as quick, but this is probably my favorite to write so I will try be updating it soon....I think.**

**Also the first few chapters will be having Flashbacks a lot in them. If you totally hate having flashbacks just let me know and I will try to think of something else to put in it.**

**But until the next update please review let me know you all are reading it and I am not just randomly writing a story no one likes haha**

**Review**

**:D**


	3. A Little Too Not Over You'

**Sorry I haven't updated in awhile but thanks so much for the reviews! The song is A Little Too Not Over You and I don't own it, nor do I own anything else haha. So read and enjoy!**

**:D**

_It never crossed my mind at all__  
__That's what I tell myself__  
__What we had has come and gone_

_Brooke sat in her brother's and his best friend apartment. Cam was still asleep and Brooke had fallen asleep on the couch after a very long night, but woke up early like she normally does on night when they go out and drink. Dragging herself off the couch she walked into the kitchen to make some coffee for the boys and maybe since she was feeling very generous some breakfast._

"_I had fun last night." She heard a female voice say and some louder footsteps behind the voice._

"_Umm…yeah me too." She heard the male voice say and laughed because she knew who that was, Lucas._

"_Well I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight? Maybe get dinner or something?" the female voice asked and Brooke knew it was time for her little act. As soon as she heard Lucas mumble an umm she was walking into the living room._

"_Baby there you are." She smiled walking in giving Lucas a kiss on the cheek and him giving her the thank you smile, "I wanted to talk."_

"_Lucas who is this?" the blonde asked holding her shoes in her hand. She definitely looked like she had a fun night. Her hair was a mess going every way her makeup was all smudged and her short black dress wrinkled. All that said she definitely had sex last night but she was expecting more out of this then it was._

"_Oh Kelly this is Brooke. My umm...girlfriend." Lucas told her nervously already waiting for the slap he normally got with this news._

"_You have a girlfriend?!" she yelled and Brooke tried to hold in her laughter with this one._

"_Yeah. We broke up the other night but…" Brooke says turning towards Lucas placing her hands flat on his bare chest and giving her best fake upset look, "I think I miss you."_

"_You think or your sure? Because I told you I can't have this back and forth anymore." Lucas said holding onto her wrist and trying to be serious._

"_No I am serious this time. I know I have messed up a lot and I am sorry. I am so sorry Broody. Please forgive me I love you so much." Brooke fake begged stepping closer and running her finger up his bare chest, "You know you want me still."_

"_Of course I want you, baby I still love you but I just…" he trailed off trying to look depressed._

"_Shhh…" Brooke hushed placing her finger on his lips to silence him, "Just give into it Broody." She whispered seductively taking a step closer to him, "Just give in." she whispered with her lips inches from his and was a little surprised when he swallow hard but figured it was all for show._

"_Excuse me aren't you upset he just had sex with me last night?" the blonde questioned but Brooke just shook her head no keeping her eyes locked with Lucas's._

"_Not if he is having sex with me tonight." She smirked looking over at the girl, "What you say baby?" she asked kinking her eyebrow at him._

"_Yeah ok." he nodded grabbing Brooke and throwing her over his shoulder making her squeal, "Umm...sorry Kelly but I can't help it. I'm in love." He says and feels Brooke laughing over his shoulder and he bounces her on his shoulder to silence her but she lets out a snort making him laugh some._

"_Whatever asshole!" Kelly yelled slamming the door._

"_Well she was nice." Brooke smiled looking at the door still hanging upside down on Lucas's shoulder._

"_Yeah I could have really liked her." Lucas fake pouted making Brooke laugh._

"_Ok Broody games over put me down." Brooke ordered smacking his on the butt as Lucas threw her back over his shoulder and putting her on the ground, "Whoa…" she laughed brushing her hair out of her face. "So Luke when you actually going to settle down find a good one? Find an actual girlfriend?" she asked as they walked into the kitchen._

"_Now why would I want to do something as dumb as that?" he asked pouring both him and Brooke a cup of coffee as she jumped up on the counter next to him._

"_I don't know maybe so you're not alone all the time. I worry about you Broody." Brooke sighs some placing her hand on his shoulder and he looks up at her with a look she has never seen before. She has known Lucas Scott for almost a year and the guy still does things that completely take her by surprise. But he is a great guy, he is really great and it worries her he will never find someone. Just have many one night stands and never be really happy._

"_Why do you worry about me?" he whispers to her and it kind of confuses her by that._

"_Because we are friends aren't we?" she asked, she knew she was Cam's little sister but just assumed that after all this time and all the time they have hung out they were at least friends._

"_Yeah right friends…" Lucas says breaking her gaze and turning back to finish their coffee._

"_Luke what's wrong is everything ok?" she asks concerned running her hand through his messy hair and he nods yes._

"_Yeah I was just umm…nothing." He said shaking his head of what he was thinking and handing her, her coffee, "But yeah me and girlfriend that would take a pretty special person and none of the girls I have brought home have made me think they could be my actual girlfriend."_

"_None of them? You mean with all the loads of girls you bring here none have sparked your interest?" Brooke asked sipping on her coffee and raising her eyebrow at him._

"_Well maybe one." he smiled at her, but knew she wouldn't get what he meant, because honestly he didn't know what he meant._

"_Who?" She asked but he just shook his head no, "Come on Luke please tell me please. I mean after all the times I have helped you with getting girls to leave you owe telling me please." she begged and he just laughed at how cute she was._

"_How are you and Chase?" Lucas asked changing the subject but at the same time not really changing the subject._

"_We are ok." she shrugged, "I mean I know he isn't like my meant to be or anything but hell I am only 19 I will find my meant to be at some point." She shrugged taking another sip of her coffee._

"_Yeah…" Lucas nodded smiling at her as she just smiled back at him, "Me too."_

_You're better off with someone else__  
__It's for the best, I know it is__  
__But I see you__  
__Sometimes I try to hide__  
__What I feel inside_

"I should have known." Brooke mumbled to herself lying on her bed staring at the roof. She just finished talking to Rachel and was now just laying her thinking about everything. All the signs all the gut feelings yelling at her dating Lucas was a bad idea. That day she should have known dating him would be stupid he made it clear that he wasn't the dating type but she also should have known he was looking at her different. That he was looking at her like he wanted her and if she would have seen that maybe she wouldn't have be so surprised when he kissed her. Maybe she wouldn't have asked him to dance and maybe she wouldn't have given into him because she would have thought about how bad of an idea it would be.

But that night he kissed her she didn't have time to think so she kissed him back and after she did it all changed. Nothing else was discussed it was just them two. Though they didn't tell anyone right away it didn't matter she knew they were together. She should have just told him no that night and no pain would have been felt.

"Brooke?" she heard Adam call knocking on her door and entering and she just shook off all her feelings and thoughts because she can't change the past. She did give into Lucas and they did date and no matter the amount of wishing that she couldn't take them back and some days when she was honest with herself she wouldn't want to. "Hey I was wondering where you went."

"Sorry I was just talking to Rachel and she was telling me something private and I didn't know if she wanted someone else hearing our conversation." Brooke half lied half told the truth. She was sure Rachel didn't want Adam hearing them talk because Brooke didn't want him to hear them talk but still the lie being the private call was about her.

"That's cool. So you excited about them all coming?" he asked sitting next to her on her bed and Brooke nodded not sure if she should tell Adam what she is telling him or not.

"Adam I want you to know something." Brooke says and he just nods an ok, "Well you know Cam is coming and all his friends but there is more to it."

"Umm…ok…"

"Well there is Matt who is like a big brother along with Jason, but then there is Lucas." Brooke trailed off biting her lip nervously. She knew Adam needed to know that her ex boyfriend was staying with her but that didn't mean she was too happy to share that information with him.

"Ok…" Adam said a little confused.

"Ok remember how I told you I had a serious boyfriend back home and he cheated on me. How we broke up then a few months later I moved down here?" she asked and he just nodded, "Well that was Lucas."

"Wait so your ex boyfriend is coming down here?" he asked and Brooke this time just nodded, "The only other guy you have slept with and the only other guy you have ever loved?" he asked and again she nodded, "The same ex who when coming down here you cried about and missed so much?" he question because he remember that. Brooke and him were actually pretty great friends before dating and heard all about her ex boyfriend.

"Yes but Adam know he doesn't mean anything to me anymore." Brooke somewhat lied but was going to say what she needed to make Adam understand, "Him and Cam are best friends, they live together so when Cam came of course Lucas was going to come."

"Yeah well that's all fine and dandy but what if he came here for more than a fun vacation and tanning."

"What you mean? What else would he come here for?" Brooke asked but knew how dumb that sentence sounded as soon as it came out.

"For you Brooke!" Adam said almost annoyed, "Brooke what if he came here because he wants you back?"

"He doesn't" Brooke protested but saw the doubt in her boyfriends eyes, "It doesn't matter what he wants. If that's what he came here for I feel bad because he is going to get hurt because you see…" Brooke smiled climbing into her boyfriends lap, "I kinda have this boyfriend that I am kinda sorta crazy about." She smiled.

"Is that so?" Adam asked wrapping his arms around her.

"Yup he is pretty cute too. An amazing body and perfect smile. Perfect hair and just the most amazing green eyes I have ever seen." Brooke grins as she places her hands on his shoulders, "But then he has theses lips."

"What kind of lips?" Adam smiles looking up at her wrapping his arms tight around her.

"Well they are so smooth and soft… and when he kisses me like right here…" she says pointing on a spot on her neck, "I just go all stupid in his arms."

"You mean right here…." Adam says as he starts kissing her neck and sucking it lightly.

"Yeah right there." she said in a small moan as she tilts her head to the side and runs her hand through his hair, "He is really good at that." she gasps out and feels him smile in her neck kissing her a little longer then pulling out.

"Anywhere else you like him kissing you at?" he smirks and Brooke just nods with a smirk as he flips them over in her bed and he starts kissing her. He runs his hand down her shirt and starts to unbutton it then lets his tongue run across her bottom lip wanting to deepen the kiss but she pulls him back before he can.

"I love you." she whispers cupping his cheek in her hand, "I love you so much just know that ok?" she asked and he just nodded leaning down kissing her again.

"I love you too."

_And I turn around__  
__You're with him now__  
__I just can't figure it out_

"So we are here finally." Matt groans climbing out of the crammed car, "That was the longest and most boring ride of my life."

"I know it was terrible." Jason agreed, climbing out.

"Oh you boys and being so dramatic." Rachel teases climbing out and bending over shaking her hair some then throwing it back. "So how do I look?"

"Gorgeous as always." Cam smiles wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her into a kiss, "Mmm…I love you." he smiles at his girlfriend of almost two years. His girlfriend he never thought in a million years would become his serious girlfriend but somehow they just worked.

"Well I love you too." Rachel smiled leaning in kissing him.

Lucas just watched his best friend and his girlfriend, they were happy. They seemed to make it work and he envied it, he was so insanely jealous by it but when he looks over in the parking lot seeing Brooke's baby blue Volkswagen beetle he lets out a small smile. He really did miss her and really wanted to see her.

"Hey can ya'll not do it in the parking lot?" Jason joked grabbing one of his bags and handing Matt and Lucas's one of theirs.

"Yeah I would like to get in the apartment sometime today." Matt laughed as they started making their way up.

"Yeah sorry." Rachel apologizes pulling away from her boyfriend.

"Oh I'm not." Cam grins pulling her back into him and kissing her one last time before letting her go and grabbing both their bags as they also started walking up.

_Tell me why__  
__You're so hard to forget__  
__Don't remind me__  
__I'm not over it__  
_

"So should we knock?" Jason asked not sure if they should just enter or wait for Brooke.

"Well it is my sister's apartment I don't think I should have to knock." Cam said shoveling his hand in his pocket, "Plus I have a key." He smiled holding up a little silver key.

"A key for emergencies." Matt says, "And you know Brooke wouldn't like us just entering."

"Then she shouldn't have given me a key plus she enters my apartment all the time without asking so I am allowed to do the same." He shrugged opening the door and walking into the larger apartment.

"Damn this is nice how can Brookie afford this?" Jason asks looking around the large apartment not knowing how Brooke who doesn't have a job and parents weren't overly rich could afford something like this, something on the beach at that fact.

"Well she had two roommates but the graduated last month. They had their apartment paid off for the next few months but went back home. I think she is looking for roommates." Cam shrugs, "But that does give us two free bedrooms which one me and Rachel have." Cam already called.

"Yeah whatever I just want to find my best friend." Rachel says waving her hand at that and putting down her bag, "Hey skank where you at?" she called walking down a couple steps into the living room followed by the rest of the guys. "I just talked to her not long ago I know she didn't leave."

"Wait do you hear something?" Matt asked.

"Yeah I think her room is over here." Rachel said walking over to the closed door and leaning her ear up against it laughing.

"What are you laughing at?" Jason asked walking over and leaning up against it like Rachel to hear some low moans and gasps. "Oh…"

"Oh what you mean oh?" Cam asked.

"Well our Brookie wasn't having sex earlier but she is definitely having it now." Rachel laughs and sees how Lucas's face fall.

"Ok I don't need to hear this." Cam said grabbing his keys, "I'm going to go get the rest of the stuff out of the car." He may know his sister has sex and he knows he can't say anything because hell he has sex but that doesn't mean he has to listen to it.

"Yeah umm… I think I am going to go help you." Lucas nods standing there a few more seconds before following. That sick feeling he felt earlier by thinking of Brooke with some guy just went into overdrive when he pictured them actually in bed together. Pictured some guy's lips on her, hands touching her and him making her feel things that he has only made her feel.

"Hmm you think I should make our presence known?" Rachel smirked raising her eyebrow and moved her hand towards the door knob.

"No definitely not I do not want to see that." Matt said and Jason agreed as they both walked over towards couch and turned on the TV.

"Fine take away all my fun." She pouted walking over and falling on the couch next to them.

_Tell me why__  
__I can't seem to face the truth__  
__I'm just a little too not over you__  
__(eh eh eh oh eh eh eh)__  
__Not over you__  
__(eh eh eh oh eh eh eh)_

"So not really how I thought I would start my vacation." Cam says walking down the stairs towards his car.

"What you mean?" Lucas asked.

"Just hearing my sister and her boyfriend just wasn't what I wanted to hear." Cam cringed thinking about it.

"Yeah…" Lucas frowned looking down, "Me neither."

"Luke I'm sorry man I didn't even think about that." Cam apologized completely being an idiot and forgetting about his whole best friend, little sister thing.

"No its cool. I mean I can't really say anything right." Lucas shrugged trying not to think about it.

"You know even if it may seem weird you can talk to me about it."

"I know and I know you were in a shitty spot when it all went down. I mean she is your sister and I messed up bad. I just…" he pauses wondering if he should tell this, after all this time to Brooke's brother. Best friend or not Brooke is Cam's little sister and he hurt her, he hurt her bad and its killed Lucas losing her but it also killed him since he almost lost his best friend, he almost lost the whole Davis kids that he grew to love and it just sucked all around.

"Just what?" Cam asked opening up his car and looking at his friend.

"Even with everything that happened. With all the bad stuff I still loved her. I still do love her." Lucas told him and saw Cam nod, "I know I can't do anything about those feelings because she clearly moved on. She is happy and over me but the whole actually hearing her with some other guy. Just wasn't something I was ready for." Lucas frowned grabbing some of the other bags in the car.

"I know and I am sorry I know you didn't want to think she moved on, but she is happy. I just want to know that you are going to be ok with all this. I mean Adam is going to be around and do you think you will be ok with him holding her hand and kissing her and whatever they might do when we are around?" Cam asked knowing his best friend hasn't dated since his little sister. Though Lucas went out he never had another girlfriend since her and wasn't so sure when he would again. But at the same time knowing his sister was hurt, she was hurt bad and he won't let Lucas do that to her again, even if he is his best friend.

"Yeah man I will be fine. Don't worry." Lucas waved him on and Cam nodded an ok knowing to drop this conversation as he finished grabbing everything and heading back up. "I'm going to be fine." Lucas repeated but again frowned grabbing his sweatshirt he wasn't even sure why he brought.

_Memories__  
__Supposed to fade__  
__What's wrong with my heart?__  
__Shake it off, let it go__  
__Didn't think it be this hard__  
__Should be strong__  
__Moving on__  
__But I see you__  
__Sometimes I try to hide__  
__What I feel inside_

"_Brooke we are going to have to tell him sooner or later." Lucas said with a little bit of annoyance in his tone. He was slowly growing tired of this sneaking around and was wondering why his girlfriend just wouldn't tell her brother yet._

"_Well I choose later." She told him hopping out of his bed and pulling his sweatshirt over her head._

"_Later Brooke it's been three damn months." He growled climbing off his bed and pulling his gym shorts on heading out of his bedroom. _

_Brooke heard the slamming of cabinets, she didn't want to upset Lucas she loved him but as amazing these last three months have been she still couldn't tell Cam. He was going to be enraged, one that's they have snuck around all this time and two because he just would hate knowing Lucas was her boyfriend._

_With a sigh Brooke walked into Lucas's kitchen to find him searching for what she knew was nothing just keeping his mind off being angry with her, "I'm sorry." she whispers wrapping her arms around his waist from behind and kissing his shoulder, "I'm sorry."_

"_I know I don't deserve you Brooke." He frowned still not looking at her._

"_Lucas that's not true." she argued._

"_No it is," he said turning around to look at her, "I love you but I know I don't deserve you. I know Cam will be pissed and I know he will be pissed because he agrees with the fact I don't deserve you."_

"_That's just dumb Lucas." she growls a little annoyed._

"_Well dumb or not you agree with it hence why you haven't told him." he frowned and Brooke felt her heart breaking at the thought he really thinks that. That, that is her reason behind not telling her brother._

"_No!" she tells him quickly shaking her head, "That's not it of course I don't think that. I just…" she trails off searching for her words, "I just don't want to ruin ya'lls friendship over me." she confesses looking down from him, "I don't want to be the reason ya'll fight or whatever. And then you agreeing with him and then…" she trails not really wanting to admit that the reasons behind her fear of her brother finding out is kind of because she thinks if he knows she will lose Lucas._

"_Brooke…" Lucas finally smiles lifting her chin to look at him, "I love Cam I do he is my best friend but he is not going to keep me away from you. And though he will be angry I don't think he will really end our friendship over this. I mean maybe if it was just a little fling or something I could see him kicking my ass but this isn't a fling. This isn't just for fun I love you Brooke." He smiles brushing her hair behind her ear, "God Pretty Girl I am so in love with you."_

"_I love you too." She smiles leaning up on her tip toes wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him gently. "We will tell him tonight. We will tell him everything." She again smiles before pushing lips back against his._

"_Mmm…ok." Lucas agreed wrapping his arms tight around her and lifting her up on the counter behind them, "Did I ever tell you how unbelievably sexy you are in this thing?" he asked pulling on the string of his old worn sweatshirt never thinking it looked better unless it was on her._

"_You just think that because I have nothing on underneath it." She grins playing with his hair._

"_No…well yes but still your just so damn sexy." He told her licking his lips as his eyes wonder all over her body making her blush, "And the fact you don't know it just makes it so much better." He whispers as he starts to nibble on her ear before kissing down her neck prepared to leave a mark right next to the one he left a little while ago._

"_Luke…" she moans tilting her head to the side as he bit her then sucking harder. Brooke just wrapped her legs around his waist pulling him closer to her as he picked her off the counter and started to stumble back to his bedroom. _

_Being so caught up in each other neither heard the front door open and close, or the keys being tossed on the table by the front door, neither heard anything until they heard a very confused and pissed voice snap, "What the hell!?"_

_  
__And I turn around  
You're with him now  
I just can't figure it out_

_Tell me why  
You're so hard to forget  
Don't remind me  
I'm not over it  
Tell me why  
I can't seem to face the truth  
I'm just a little too not over you_

Cam was so pissed, but they figured finding Brooke pretty much naked in just his sweatshirt and her all wrapped around his best friend was probably the last thing he ever thought he would witness. They both tried to reason with him, tried to explain but when you find your little sister straddling your best friend it doesn't really have much to explain, because it looked just how he thought.

.

_  
__Maybe I regret__  
__Everything I said__  
__No way to take it all back, yeah__  
__Now I'm on my own__  
__How I let you go__  
__I'll never understand__  
__I'll never understand__  
__Yeah, oooh, oooh, oooh__  
__Oooooooh__  
__Oh__  
__Ooooh, oh_

"_Cam umm… this isn't..Ok look this…shit." Brooke stuttered knowing that the line 'this isn't what it looks like' is just a stupid one of course this is what it looks like._

"_Brooke if you are going to tell me this isn't what it looks like then maybe you shouldn't have your damn body wrapped around him!" Cam snapped as Brooke kind of patted Lucas shoulder and he slowly slid her down his body putting her on the floor._

"_Look man we can explain." Lucas said._

"_Well you better explain! I want to know why the hell you were just doing that with my baby sister!" Cam yelled, "What the hell is wrong with you?!"_

"_Nothing is wrong with me. I…" Lucas started but gets cut off by a fist flying into his jaw making him stumble back into the wall behind him._

"_Cam!" Brooke yelled jumping in between them before Cam went to swing again, "God Luke are you ok?" she freaked running gentle touching his jaw as he nods wiggling his mouth feeling it pop, "Cam what the hell is wrong with you!" she hissed turning to look at him._

"_What the hell is wrong with me what is wrong with him!?" he yelled, "What are you doing!?" he snapped at his best friend, "What the hell are you doing to my sister, with my sister? What making her another one of your sluts!" _

"_No!" he yelled looking over his girlfriends shoulder at her brother and his best friend, "And don't call her that!"_

"_Don't call her what one of your sluts?! Because right now it is kind of looking like it!" Cam yelled not that he thought his sister was a slut, she isn't he loves his baby sister but that didn't change the fact his sister is looking like she was about to have sex with his best friend, his best friend who is one of the biggest man whores he knows._

"_Cam!" Brooke shrieked not believing he just said that to her, said that about her, "How could you say that about me?" she frowned a little._

"_It's not you Brooke. I didn't mean to say that I meant damn it." He cursed then getting more angry since the fact he should be pissed about walking in on this not feeling guilty for anything, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to say that to you. I shouldn't have said that." he said and Brooke couldn't help but smile a little since his pissed tone for his best friend quickly changed to his sweet one for her. He always sucked at snapping at her._

"_Your damn right you shouldn't have said that to her." Lucas snapped putting a protective hand on Brooke's lower back._

"_What the hell are you doing don't touch her!" Cam yelled quickly recovering from his ping of guilt._

"_Trust me Cam I can kind of touch her whenever I want." Lucas said with a small smirk moving his arm around Brooke's waist pulling her closer to him and truth is he is only this because one it was true he can touch her when he wants, two his friend is pissing him off and three his jaw is hurting like a bitch._

"_You sick son of a bitch that is my little sister!" he hissed with a tight jaw again taking a step towards him._

"_Cam stop!" she yelled placing her hands on his chest pushing him away._

"_I know who she is Cam. I know her a lot better than you think!" he again smiled placing his other hand on her hip, "A lot better."_

"_You bastard!" he growled again jumping at him and Brooke just shoved him back._

"_Stop both of you!" she yelled, "Cam stop being an over protective ass and listen and Lucas stop egging him on damn it!" _

"_I'm sorry but baby he is the one starting it he won't damn listen!" Lucas said and it kind amazed Cam how his voice changed, his tone was completely different with Brooke, it was calmer and softer and maybe even a little apologetic, it was definitely different then his normal tone with people, with girls but it still didn't change anything._

"_Wait!"Cam paused holding up his hand and looking at them both, "Did you just call my sister baby?"_

"_Well she is my girlfriend so I can call her whatever I want." he somewhat growled completely changing his tone from just a second ago._

"_Girlfriend?" Cam sorta laughed, "Lucas you don't have girlfriends, you have girls." He told him and Brooke saw Lucas's hands make a fist and jaw tighten._

"_Luke…" she whispered but he just kept his eyes focused on her brother, "Broody…" she repeated using his nickname and turning his face too look at her, "Hey…" she smiled rubbing his jaw line, his jaw that was starting to bruise a little from her brothers hit and the jaw that she really wanted to kiss but figuring it wasn't the best time._

"_Hey…" he smiled back at her and again Cam saw how Lucas changed. His body language, his voice, even his smile was different then one he ever seen, "I'm sorry." he whispered and Brooke nodded._

"_I know just please don't talk for a second, please for me?" he asked and he nodded as she smiled leaning up giving him a small kiss, "Thank you." she told him with her back still to her brother mouthing 'I love you.' to him as he nods._

"_I know I do to Pretty Girl." He smiled both forgetting her brother in the room for a second just staring at each other with a small smile._

"_Brooke I am still damn here." Cam growled making them lose the little moment they were having._

"_Ok look Cam." She said turning to look at him, "I know what you must be thinking and how this is not what you expected to walk in on."_

"_Your damn right on that." he agreed with a nod crossing his arms over his chest._

"_But listen this…" she says waving her hand between her and Lucas, "Isn't just some fun thing. I mean maybe at first it was like that but over these months it changed it…"_

"_Months?" he interrupted, "How long has this…" he said waving his hand much like his sister had just done, "Been going on?" he asks and Brooke freezes now knowing things might get worse, hell if they could get worse, "Brooke?! How long have ya'll been sneaking around or whatever?" he repeated._

"_Three months." She whispered so quietly she sounds like a small child getting in troubled by her parents._

"_Three…three months." He said with a small laugh, "You two have been doing this for three months?"_

"_Cam just listen to her." Lucas growled in a protective tone that again was unfamiliar to Cam but seemed to silence him._

"_Cameron you're my big brother and I love you, I love you more than anything and respect your opinion more than anyone's but not this time. I'm sorry I won't. I am with Lucas, I am with him as my boyfriend and I get you don't like that I totally understand that but you're not going to change my opinion on that." she smiled looking up at Lucas, "I love him." she smiled as he leaned down kissing her softly._

"_Brooke I get you may think you feel that."_

"_No I do feel that!" Brooke snapped._

"_Brooke its Lucas. I am sorry but he is my best friend meaning I know him. I know him pretty damn well and I know he doesn't love. He has girls over, has fun with them but he doesn't love them and I will not let him use you like that." he told her cutting his eyes at his friend._

"_You don't know shit Cam!" Lucas hissed wrapping his arm around Brooke yanking her into him, "You don't know anything I feel or think."_

"_So you didn't use your I love you line to get her into bed. Get my little sister to sleep with you! She is a virgin Lucas damn even for you that's low using that you love her to get some. I never once thought that I had to worry about you trying to screw around with my sister because I thought which was stupid of me clearly that you would do whatever you want with whoever you want but my sister. Seriously was it just a fun challenge or something? Seeing if the all mighty Lucas Scott would get his best friends little sister in the sack because then you really would have accomplished it all."_

"_Cameron!" Brooke snapped to shut him up, "He didn't use a line on me he didn't push me into doing anything! If you must know he never once tried to get me to sleep with him I am the one who told him I wanted to and even after that he still almost stopped us. He told me if I wanted to not do anything it was fine we could stop but I didn't want to. I didn't want to stop because I wanted to be with him. So if you are going to yell at anyone then yell at me!"_

"_Brooke you only slept with him because you thought he cared or in your words loved you. You thought he would still be there but what happens now huh? He got what he wanted out of you so what you going to do when he gets bored and wants his fun random night out with random sluts what are you going to do then huh?!"_

"_Cam I am not some naïve child. You are acting like all this is Lucas's fault! It's not and I didn't sleep with him because I thought he cared for me I did it because I know he does!"_

"_How do you know that Brooke what because he said it?" he said with a small laugh. "Anyone can say they love someone Brooke it's really not that hard."_

"_I do love her!" Lucas finally snapped, "It wasn't a line it wasn't something I used on her. It was something that I wanted to say, wanted to tell her but put it off because of what you just said there. I wouldn't use a line on Brooke and I don't give a shit what you think, I wouldn't hurt her or use her I would never do that!" he yelled, "Do you for a second believe I would risk our friendship, a friendship of years for a damn fling?! Jesus Christ Cam!" he yelled throwing his hands in the air leaning against the wall behind him._

"_I…" he finally stuttered for the first time since finding out this small bit of information, finally becoming completely lost for words._

"_Cam its true." She whispered walking over towards Lucas, "I know it may upset you I get that." she tells him taking his arm and wrapping herself in his arms, "Cam I know he loves me." she tells him as he wraps his arms around her tighter and rests his chin on her shoulder as she leans back into him, "I know by the way he holds me, and touches me. I know by the way he kisses me or talks to me." she tells him and smiles when she feels Lucas kiss her shoulder, "But what then when he looks at me," she pauses turning her head to look up at him over her shoulder, "There is no doubt in my mind whatever he loves me."_

_Tell me why__  
__You're so hard to forget__  
__Don't remind me__  
__I'm not over it__  
__Tell me why__  
__I can't seem to face the truth__  
__I'm just a little too not over you_

_  
_"Luke you coming man?" Lucas heard Cam call looking up to see him heading back up the stairs.

"Yeah…" he sighed shoving his sweatshirt back in his bag, "I'm coming."

_Tell me why  
You're so hard to forget  
Don't remind me  
I'm not over it  
Tell me why  
I can't seem to face the truth  
And I really don't know what to do_

_I'm just a little too not over you  
(eh eh eh oh eh eh eh)  
Not over you  
(eh eh eh oh eh eh eh)_

**I know there is no actually Brooke Lucas future meeting but that is next chapter I promise so until then review please :D**


	4. How Do You Sleep?

**Seriously all the reviews and story alerts for this story are great. Its for stuff like that which makes me update sooner since that shows ya'll are enjoying the story :D**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter the Song is How Do You Sleep? and I of course don't own that or anything else.**

**:D**

**ENJOY!!**

**

* * *

**

_It's been about a year now_

_Ain't seen or heard from you__  
__I been missin' you crazy__  
__How do you how do you sleep_

Lucas and the rest of the group sat awkwardly in Brooke's living room. Well the guys sat awkwardly in the living room; Rachel just sat with a smirk watching how the longer the clocked ticked the more Lucas moved around. She was more than sure since he reentered the apartment about 10 minutes ago his eyes haven't left Brooke's bedroom door.

"Maybe we should leave." Cam suggested feeling very weird just sitting in his sister's house while she was doing things he didn't want to know on the other side of the door.

"Or we could just wait." Rachel said with an eye roll flipping through a magazine not seeing the big deal.

"I just feel weird. I mean my sister is possibly having sex in there." Cam cringed at the thought. He just wanted to believe like the rest of the brothers in the world their little sister never had sex. Like a daughter or something, they all just died virgins.

"Oh she is definitely having sex in there." Rachel laughs as all the boys make a weird face, "Oh come on why are ya'll acting like this is so weird. Everyone in here has had sex. We are all adults and I don't get why Lukie over here looks so grossed out since he has had lots of sex with Brooke. Lots of sex in random places, now that's weird."

"Rachel!" they all freaked together.

"What? Lucas did you not have sex with Brooke?" she asked and just watches him give her a look, one she couldn't read but one she also didn't care to much to figure out "Yup see their you go. Oh and Cam stopping looking so grossed out do you know how many times your sister actually heard us having sex?"

"None I hope."

"Well you hope wrong. Remember the time in the kitchen?" she questions and he nods, "Well she was in the living room watching a movie. Then the time in the hot tub on Fourth of July her and if I remember correctly Lucas were in the pool right next to us."

"God tell me ya'll weren't?" Cam hoped looking over at his best friend.

"Umm…yeah we were, but we were a little too…distracted to pay too much attention to ya'll if that makes you feel any better." He half smiled thinking about it.

_Flashback_

"_Luke tell me my brother and Rachel aren't having sex in the hot tub?" Brooke cringed as she heard her best friend make a certain noise she didn't want to hear if it was because of something her brother was doing._

"_Umm…" Lucas paused looking over his girlfriends shoulder, "Yup they are definitely doing that. Well on the way to doing that." he laughed as he moved around the pool with his girlfriend in his arms._

"_Ok gross." Brooke said making a disgusted face as she wrapped her arms around her boyfriend's neck and he spun them around so her back was against the wall._

"_You think we could be quieter than them?" he smirked leaning in kissing her neck letting his tongue run up it then kissing softly on her jaw._

"_Luke I think that would be weird. My brother is right there." she said tossing a glance over her shoulder to see him and Rachel getting a little busy in the hot tub._

"_But if we are quiet he won't even know." he smiled kissing her and running his hands up her body giving her all sorts of goose bumps, "Plus I think he is a little too busy to pay attention to what we are doing." _

"_You are probably right." She laughed pulling out of their kiss, "What if I give you ten of this…" she pauses as she starts kissing him but pulls away before he can deepen it, "And then we go upstairs and I will give you whatever else you want." she suggested and watched as he sat debating things for a second, before standing up from the water with her in his arms, "Luke." She laughed as they made their way back into the hotel, "Where we going?"_

"_Ten minutes is too long of kissing you without wanting more." He laughed reaching over hitting the button on the elevator, "and it's definitely to long when I am wanting you so bad right now." He smirked as the bell dinged and they walked inside her still in his arms._

"_When are you not wanting me?" she teased._

"_Hmm…good point." He grinned the cutest grin she has ever seen as he leans in kissing her, "Have I told you today how much I love you Miss Brooke Davis?"_

"_No Mr. Lucas Scott I don't think you have." she smiled running her hand through his damp hair as he leaned up against the elevator wall smiling at her._

"_Well I do." he smiled leaning in to kiss her, "Very, very much." He whispered to her as he kissed her._

"_I love you too." She smiled in their kiss and heard the elevator door ding signaling them they were at their floor but neither moved, "You know Rach and Cam got to do it in a hot tub before us, you think we could do it in an elevator before them?" she teased as the elevator door closed again._

"_Oh look at my baby being all adventuress." He laughed as he pulled the button on to stop them in between floors, "I think I am rubbing off on you Pretty Girl." He grinned as he spun them around again pushing her up against the elevator wall._

"_Mmm…and that is just terrible." She teased as he leaned in kissing her and mumbling "Oh so terrible."_

_Flashback over._

_I found the letter you wrote me__  
__It still smells just like you__  
__Damn those sweet memories__  
__How do you, how do you sleep__  
__How do you sleep?_

"Luke hello?" Jason said waving his hand in front of his friend face, who seemed to be in a complete daze.

"Oh...umm what?" Lucas asked shaking his head off all his thoughts once again.

"Nothing you just completely zoned out on us." Matt told him, and wondered what everyone else in the room wondered. Was he thinking about Brooke again?

"Yeah sorry guess I am just really tired." He lied and they all nodded and no one had a chance to make another comment when they heard a voice talking.

"Brooke I am home you slut. No I am not staying long just need to pick some things up before I move in with-" the girl stop when she notices people in her living room, people she has no clue who they are, "Umm…none of ya'll are Brooke."

"No but I am Jason." Jason jumps up at the dark headed girl sticking out his hand.

"Umm…hi I'm Quinn." She smiles taking it and would laugh at how this guy is staring at her.

"And I am Clay." I voice says behind her as he approaches them and wrapping one arm around Quinn's waist protectively and sticking out his own hand, "Quinn's boyfriend." He smiles.

"Well damn." Jason frowns, "Guess back to finding another girl." He shrugs dropping her hand and walking back over to his spot on the couch.

"Excuse him." Rachel said jumping up and sticking out her hand, "Hi I'm Rachel." She introduced at Quinn shook her hand telling her hi, "and this is Cam, Matt, Jason who just acted dumb with you and Lucas." she tells her pointing at each person.

"Wait your Lucas?" Quinn asked looking at the blonde.

"Umm...yeah that would be me." he frowned a bit knowing if this girl was Brooke's friend than his reputation already sucked.

"Well this is going to be interesting." Quinn told her boyfriend.

"Oh yeah." Clay agreed, "So which one of you is Brookie's brother?" he asked as Cam raised his hand, "Yeah guess I should have guessed that one. You two kind of look alike."

"Yeah I guess we do a little." Cam agreed since they both had dark hair and hazel eyes. They were both pretty in shape but the difference is Cam has well of course facial hair not much just a little scruff and their personalities are a little different. Brooke is more sociable and friendly as Cam's has always been a little more of the quiet one, well that was until he made best friends with Lucas and started dating Rachel.

"Well may we ask where Brooke is?" Quinn asked looking around not to seeing her roommate.

"Oh umm well she is in her room with I think his name is Adam." Rachel tells them and Quinn just laughs.

"Oh god she is going to die when she knows you are all sitting out her while she is having sex with her boyfriend." Quinn laughs as she walks over to her best friend's door.

"Well I mean they have been in their awhile, I bet they are almost done." Rachel tells her.

"Oh trust me if you don't tell her to come out Brooke will be in their all day with him. She takes all the energy out of that poor boy." Quinn laughs.

"Trust me I know." Lucas mumbles falling back in his chair getting a smack from Matt and they both let out a small laugh.

"Brooke…" Quinn calls knocking on the door.

"_Uhh...I'm…god…I'm a little busy Quinn._" Quinn hears Brooke gasp out making her laugh more. "Yeah I can hear that but umm… I was kind of wondering what your brother looked like." She laughs looking over at everyone who just let out a small laugh, everyone but Lucas but Quinn still just shh'd them.

"_Umm…he…Adam…_" she heard in another gasp, "He looks like Adam?" she asks and everyone just laughs more.

"_No he umm…hair…_" she moans making Quinn laugh more, "So he has hair?" she smirks leaning up against the door frame.

"_Quinn…could…uhh...could you please give us a minute. We are…uhh god baby…busy._" She heard Adam moan making her laugh more, "Sure thing Adam I will just take all these people out to lunch while ya'll finish up. And Brooke Cam is very cute; he does look a lot like you." Quinn laughs as she hears Brooke freak, "_What?! Shit!_"

"_Adam wear are my pants._" She heard Brooke and just pushed off the wall walking back over to them, "They'll be out in just a minute." She smiled holding up one finger as she walked back over to Clay who was on the couch and falling down into his lap. "So how was the ride down?"

_Tried my best at movin' on__  
__Have yet to find a girl like you__  
__See things now I didn't before__  
__Now wishin' I had more time with you_

_How do you stay awake__  
__Knowin' all I do is think of you__  
__All the things we thought about__  
__Then, never will happen again__  
__If I could just see you_

Quinn wasn't wrong about Brooke being out in a minute, because about the time everyone started sharing their ride down Brooke came flying into the living room. Everyone laughed when she slid across the hard wood floors almost doing a complete spilt but caught herself with both hands before standing back up.

"Hey guys." She smiles brushing her hair out of her face and adjusting her shirt as she tried to catch her breath, "How are things?"

"God Brooke you are such a slut." Rachel laughed jumping of the couch and hugging her best friend she missed so much, "But I missed you so much."

"I missed you too." Brooke smiled hugging her, "And I am sorry that was embarrassing." She whispered in Rachel's ear so no one could hear and the red head just laughed. "Hey Matt, Jay." She smiled as both boys walked over, boys that she will always consider family.

"Aww…Brookie we missed you." Matt smiled hugging her and kissing her cheek, "Thanks for letting us stay here."

"Anything or my boys." she smiled before turning towards Jason who picked her up in a big hug, "Jay!" she squealed as he spun her around in circles. Jason was always the crazy one, he was about 6 feet tall and not heavy but not skin either, he was like a giant teddy bear and Brooke always thought he gave the best hugs ever.

"Brookie!!!!" he laughed as he spun her around before placing her back down, "I have missed you. Why haven't you called as much as you promised? Is it because you have been a little busy with what you were just doing in the bedroom? Hmmm?" he teased as Brooke started to blush.

"Well Jay I am more than sure a phone goes both ways. What have you been busy doing? Hmm?" she asked giving him the same look he gave her making him laugh.

"I wish I was doing what you were just doing."

"Jason!" she squealed slapping his arm as he laughed giving her another hug, "But I have missed you."

"Well I missed you too crazy girl." He laughed stepping away as her favorite of the group stepped forward.

"Cam." She smiled a little happy yet sad smile as he hugged her. She felt dumb when she felt a tear burn in her eye but she couldn't help it, she missed her big brother so much. "I missed you big brother." She cried burring her head in his shoulder and he held her a little tighter.

"I missed you too baby sister but why you crying?" he asked still holding her close.

"A year is just way, way to long without seeing my big brother." She told him pulling out of the hug as he wiped her already smudge make up.

"Yeah I know what you mean." he smiles. He loved his baby sister; she was pretty much his best friend. Since they were little they were best friends, no one came in-between them, and no one dared tried. It hurt him when Brooke got hurt by Lucas and it hurt even more when she left, because he agreed a year without seeing one of the most important people to you is just way to long.

Lucas couldn't help but smile as he watched Brooke talk to her big brother. He knew how much she loved him, and how much she loved her. He honestly never meet siblings as close as they were, always hanging out, always together. They both pretty much shared friends and they both pretty much took the others side on everything, which explained why after Cam find out about them she ended them, it was only about a week but it was probably one of the longest weeks of Lucas's life.

_If I had my way come and get you girl__  
__In your favorite car with the missing top__  
__Remember 'round my way where we used to park__  
__And did all those things to steal your heart__  
_

_Flashback_

"_Brooke don't do this." Lucas felt like he had been begging her that for about the last 20 minutes. He never thought this would actually happen, he never thought when she walked into his room she would be doing this but she is and he is begging her not too._

"_Lucas I don't want to do this but I have too. He is my brother, I can't lose him." she cried, two days ago her worst fear came true, he brother found out about her and Lucas and he all but told her to pick. Pick his best friend or pick him and even if it was killing her inside she had to pick the person who has always been there for her, who will always, be there for her._

"_But I can't lose you." he sighed walking over taking her hands in his, "I love you so much Brooke and I know you love me."_

"_Of course I love you Lucas. I have never loved anyone as much as I love you but that doesn't change anything." She told him as more tears fell from her eyes._

"_He will get over it. He will be fine with it all he needs is time. Time to process it all. I will prove to him I have changed, that I am not going to hurt you." he told her pulling her into his arms and holding her tight, "I can show him I'm different I can."_

"_He won't listen Lucas, he won't listen to any of it." She cried into his chest, "I didn't want this to happen. I knew there was a chance but I didn't want it to happen."_

"_I know Pretty Girl I know you didn't. We will figure it out. I will figure it out." He promised even if he knew the promise was most likely empty since he knew his best friend and he knew Cam wouldn't believe he changed but he would do all he could to prove that._

"_And if we don't?" she asked pulling out of their hug looking up at him through blurry eyes, "If he doesn't listen and we don't figure it out what will happen next?" she questioned but Lucas just answer because he didn't know what to say. So the only thing he could think of doing was lean down kissing her softly and whispering, "I love you."_

_Flashback Over_

_It's been about a year now__  
__Ain't seen or heard from you__  
__I been missin' you crazy__  
__How do you, how do you sleep?__  
__Found the letter you wrote me__  
__It still smells just like you__  
__Damn those sweet memories__  
__How do you, how do you sleep?_

She looked gorgeous like she always did; yet looking at her did hurt. Her hair was a tangled mess even though he knew she tried running her hands through it to fix it. Her eye liner was smudged and though some of it was from tears he also knew it was smudge when she ran into the room. He recognized both her hair and makeup only because he has been on many times the cause of the tangled hair and smudge eye liner. She had on a pair of old jeans that she always wore but what hurt the most was her shirt. It wasn't a shirt it was a jacket, a guy's jacket. It was navy blue and it zipped in the front and was way too big for her, to Lucas it didn't seem to fit her as well as his clothes fit her.

Yet than what made his heart stop completely was when she turned to look at him. She just stared right at him and they locked eyes and everyone in the room saw the look they were sharing. You would have to be completely blind not to see it, but neither moved. Neither walked got up to share a hug like the rest of the room they just stayed still. Him in his chair and her next to her brother each almost daring the other to speak first and finally one did.

"Hey Luke." She whispered with a small smile and wave both of which he returned.

"Hey Brooke." He whispered back and he debated getting up giving her a hug, he wasn't sure if he was allowed to or not but he thought about it and about the time he decided to do it someone else walked in the room stopping him in his tracks. He cut his eyes over at the guy standing towards the back of everyone and saw how Brooke gave him a confused look before following his gaze to see her boyfriend behind them.

"Umm…everyone this is Adam." She introduced waving him over as he walked over slipping one hand around her waist. "Adam this is my big brother Cam." She tells him pointing at the guy in front of her.

"Adam." Cam said reaching out his hand and being the over protective brother he is squeezed his hand a little too tight, "Nice to meet you."

"You too man, although not really how I wanted to meet my girlfriend's brother." He said with a small laugh making everyone else crack a smile. Everyone but Lucas that Brooke looked over and saw looking down playing with his hands. For a second he looked up at her, they locked eyes again and Brooke could literally see all the pain in his face but looked away fast trying to ignore it all, needing to ignore it all.

"But umm…Adam, this is Rachel, Matt, Jason…" and with a small pause turning to look at Lucas, "and Lucas." she finished and felt Adam's hand tighten on her side and pulling her more into him.

"Nice too meet you all." He smiled but everyone would again be stupid to miss the look he gave Lucas. Kind of like on that says 'You messed up, I got her now don't even think about it.' Lucas definitely caught the look and just started talking to Matt as everyone talked to Brooke and Adam.

_Baby all that I hear from my friends__  
__Again again and again come and ask 'bout you__  
__They say, "We saw your girl at the game__  
__And damn we gotta say a big mistake by you"_

"I don't like him." Lucas whispered to his best friend.

"Dude you haven't even talked to him." Matt laughed at his friend.

"Don't care look at him. Look how he holds her, I don't like it. I mean she can move on her own, doesn't need him to guide her through the damn room." He tells him as he cuts his eyes over at his ex and see's how Adam keeps his hand around her or on her back the whole time, it's just annoying.

"Dude you do realize he does nothing you never did right?"

"No." Lucas scuffs leaning back in his chair making his friend laugh more.

"Dude yes you did. The only difference is that you and Brooke either groped or had your faces like glued to each other all the damn time."

"What? What are you talking about? We were not at all like that." Lucas argues but Matt just shakes his head laughing more.

"Ok I'm sorry but it's true. Luke I never seen two people making out or touching each other as much you and Brooke do. And do you want to know what I am praying to god for?"

"What?"

"I just hope for you Brooke and Adam aren't half as affectionate as you and her were." Matt told him with a small sad smile patting his leg as he stood up, "So Brookie tell me what you are going to be showing me this vacation." Matt said walking off leaving Lucas sitting there thinking.

"Yeah…" he mumbled to himself as he stood up, "Me too."

_  
__Not only does your body bang__  
__But I miss the conversation too__  
__Tell me that you're gettin' more sleep__  
__Can't think, can't eat till I come see you_

Everyone sat around talking and catching up. Apparently Quinn and Brooke had been roommates since she moved her but when Brooke told her she had family visiting she told her until they head home she will just stay at Clay's house. Clearly Clay didn't object. Everyone seemed to get along and Lucas didn't really talk to Adam, nor did Adam talk to Lucas.

They had been hanging out about an hour and in that hour Lucas probably glanced at Brooke about a million times. She was in Adam's lap; he was on the couch with one arm around her waist rubbing his hand slowly up and down her back as the other rested a little high if you ask Lucas on her thigh. It weird Lucas out a little seeing some guy touching Brooke since other than Chase he has never seen her with another guy, and he quickly found himself praying for the same thing Matt had.

"Oh damn." Adam frowned looking at his phone seeing what time it was.

"What's wrong?" Brooke asked looking at him as everyone else talked.

"I got practice in half an hour." He told her and it was clear to Brooke he wasn't overly comfortable leaving Brooke.

"Oh ok." she said as she started too easy out of his lap but he just pulled her back into it.

"It's ok I can skip it." He shrugged like it was no big deal.

"Adam you can't skip. Coach will be pissed and on top of working the hell out of you he will bench you next game." She told him as she rubbed his hand with hers, "and I don't want you benched because I planned on bringing them all to your next game and show off how amazing my boyfriend is." she laughed.

"Yeah. Ok well I guess I could go." He told her as he looked up at her ex.

"Don't guess just go. And try not to worry because I know what is going on in that gorgeous head of yours so stop." She smiled and he nodded ok as she leaned up kissing him.

"Ok well get up." He smiled patting her butt and she laughed easing out of his lap, "Ok it was really great meeting all ya'll but I got to head out. I have practice." He told them.

"Oh ok cool. I guess we will see you later. Bye man." Cam said reaching up and shaking his hand again, making Brooke very happy.

"Later man." Adam said waving to everyone else. Brooke stood up taking his hand as she walked him to the door, "I'll call you later." He smiled placing his hands on her hips as she placed hers on top of his.

"Ok well are you going to come back after?" she asked.

"Well I unlike you still have school so I was going to finish up my homework before school tomorrow." He told her and Brooke nodded. That was one thing that would suck is that even though she was out for summer Adam still have practice and was taking some summer class so he could have an easier schedule during the school year.

"Oh ok." Brooke frowned a little picking a string off his t-shirt.

"Hey what's wrong?" he asked lifting her chin to look at him.

"I just…I don't want since everyone is here you to feel like you can't be here. Since Lucas is here you feel weird so you just kind of not come over." she frowned looking down, "I don't want them here to mess us up."

"Oh no baby that's not it. I promise I just have things I need to finish. I have a paper I haven't even started yet that's due in two days and I still have to read some book for the paper. I was going to do it all tonight so I can be with you all tomorrow." He smiled brushing her hair behind her ear, "I love you."

"I love you too." She smiled a little leaning up on her tip toes kissing him, "Promise to come by tomorrow?"

"Promise." He grinned kissing her one last time then tell her goodbye.

_If I had my way come and get you girl__  
__In your favorite car with the missing top__  
__Remember 'round my way where we used to park__  
__And did all those things to steal your heart_

_How do you, how do you sleep?__  
__How do you sleep? It's been about a year now__  
__Ain't seen or heard from you__  
__I been missin' you crazy__  
__How do you, how do you sleep?__  
__I found the letter you wrote me__  
__It still smells just like you__  
_

Brooke felt a little weird walking into the living room without Adam. If he was there than she had a distraction from Lucas but with him not she knew it would be awkward tension. If Adam was by her side no comments would be made about her and her ex but when he isn't she wasn't so sure.

"Well he is gorgeous." Rachel comments as soon as Brooke walks into the room and Brooke feels dumb that just the mention of her boyfriend she smiles.

"Yeah I know." she smiles big as she walks over to the couch sitting next to her best friend and biting her bottom lip.

"I like him Brooke. I don't like walking in on what I walked in on but I like him." Cam laughs.

"Yeah I know sorry about that." Brooke says blushing a little, "But umm…on rooms. There is Quinn's that you know she kindly gave ya'll that Rach and Cam could use. Then there is our other roommate who thank god has left so it's free. But you know wait a sec." she paused pulling out her cell phone and hitting 3 on her speed dial.

"_I just left and you're already missing me?_" _Adam teased answering his phone._

"No, well I mean yeah but that's not why I called." Brooke laughed getting up, "I'll be right back." she tell everyone as she walks out into her room shutting the door, "Umm…I was just wondering if you don't mind when you're not here over the night if one of the guys could share my bed. If that makes you uncomfortable than I get it I don't have to I was just wondering." Brooke rambled as she walked around her room.

"_Baby your rambling._" _He laughed making Brooke laugh, "But no I don't mind. I mean as long as it's not…"_

"Oh definitely not." Brooke cut him off before he said Lucas, "I was thinking more Jason. You know the cute big teddy bear."

"_Yeah ok I don't mind just tell him no cuddling._"

"Ok promise he cannot cuddle me. But I guess I'll let you go to practice call me later love you. bye."

"_Love you too bye._"

Brooke closed her phone skipping back into the living room and on the couch, "Ok just wanted to make sure but ya'll can flip and whoever wins or hell whoever loses can share my bed when Adam's not here and then the other two can take Peyton's room." She tells them.

"Ok well I'll share with ya Brookie." Matt smiles and Brooke just nods grabbing her phone to text Adam telling him that it will be Matt not Jason.

"Wait that's not fair. Brooke is smaller and takes up less room I want to share with her." Jason pouts making them all laugh.

"God ya'll are both so dumb." Rachel laughed climbing off Cam's lap and grabbing Clay's hat off his head, "Thank you my sir." She smiled as she grabbed a couple pieces of paper, "Jason write down ya'lls names and whoever I draw will share with Brooke." She shrugs as he writes down the names tossing them in the hat, "Ok Brooke your loving cuddle buddy when Adam isn't here is…" she says shaking that hat and grabbing a name, "Lucas?"

"What?!" Brooke freaks grabbing the paper looking at it.

"Jay you dumbass you put my name in there?" Lucas asked. Though he would love sharing a bed with Brooke he knew that wasn't ever going to happen.

"What you said write down our names." Jason shrugged not getting the big deal.

"Yeah but not mine you idiot." Lucas said with an eye roll standing up grabbing a book off the table, "Look if it lands on the cover Matt you get Brooke's bed and if it lands on the back Jay you can share with her ok." he says but doesn't let them answer before flipping it and seeing it land on the back facing up saying Jason one, "There you go. Jason have fun." he said sitting back in his seat looking up at Brooke who was smiling making him smile.

"Well guess that's it. Everyone if you want to rest or shower or whatever just go ahead. If ya'll want to go out tonight we can or if you want to wait until tomorrow that's fine too." Brooke shrugged.

"Actually B I you don't mind I would rather just staying in tonight. It was a long ass drive and I am beat." Cam said standing up. "I think I may nap for a bit. Love you baby sister and missed you." he smiled kissing her cheek.

"Missed you too." She smiled, "And don't you two do something gross in Quinn's bed." she teased pointing at them.

"I make no promises Quinn." Rachel laughs grabbing her boyfriend's hand as they walk to the back.

"Yeah just clean my sheets and we are fine." Quinn waves it off, "But B me and my baby are out we have dinner plans. I'll call you tomorrow"

"Ok bye Quinn, bye Clay." Brooke smiled giving them both a hug as they headed out. "Jason if you want to go to sleep go ahead I am just going to go make something to eat. Luke, Matt ya'll can rest but if you're hungry or anything just help yourself." She tells them and they all nod as they head back into the rooms to rest.

_Look__  
__Now it's been about a year and I'm tryin' to figure out__  
__How could ya?__  
__Forget about who loves you the most__  
__Why would ya?__  
__Heal my heart, heal my brain__  
__Oh how I wish you could feel my pain__  
__Cuz I couldn't get you off my mind if I tried__  
__24/7, 365__  
_

Lucas laid in the bed trying to sleep but finding it extremely hard. On top of Matt's crazy snoring for some reason he didn't like the fact he had been here almost an hour and spoken maybe two words to Brooke. He knew he shouldn't talk to her, she probably didn't want to talk to him but there was a little piece of him that wondered what if she did?

Slowly rolling out of his bed, well his bed for the next few weeks he ran his hands through his hair and shuffled his feet down the hall to the kitchen. He figured until he decided on talking to Brooke or not he might as well eat something.

He felt kind of weird digging through Brooke's fridge but at the same time the fact it was Brooke made him seem comfortable. Yet when he heard someone enter the kitchen the uncomfortable feeling come back.

"Oh sorry…I was umm…I was just looking for something to eat." He apologized then felt dumb his first conversation with Brooke is about him digging through her fridge.

"No…umm its ok I told you to make yourself at home." She shrugged and he nodded as the both stood staring at each other in silence.

"Brooke…Luke." They said at the same time making both laugh a little.

"Sorry go ahead." Lucas nodded.

"Oh I was just going to ask if you wanted some help finding something." she offered.

"Oh umm…sure." He agreed and stepped aside as she started to make him something, "Before you start cooking anything has your cooking skills improved over the past year?" he teased.

"My cooking is not that bad." She says spinning to look at him and he just gives her a yeah right look, "Ok your right but I have improved a little, but this is something Quinn made not me." she says and he just laughs leaning up against the counter.

"Well that's very good to know. I do not want to get sick the first day of my vacation." he laughs earning a smack on the arm from her.

"You are so mean." she teases as she spins back around pulling out some left over's. "Do you want something to drink?" she asks popping the food in the oven to warm up.

"Yeah sure." Lucas said as she walked over to the fridge pouring him a drink then walking over handing it to him, "Thanks." He smiled and for just a second his hand grazed hers it amazed him how just that even gave him chills. They feel into a small silence as Brooke cleaned the kitchen some. "Quinn and Clay seem cool."

"Oh yeah I love them. You know I actually went out with Clay first." she tells him as she turns leaning up against the counter.

"Really? Isn't it weird some guy you dated, dating your roommate?"

"Not as weird as my ex boyfriend staying in the same apartment as my current boyfriend." She says crossing her arms over her chest.

"True." Lucas agrees taking a sip of his drink.

"But no we went out like one time. We meet in one of my classes and I agreed to a date. However I knew me and him were a no go when meet Quinn. For weeks Quinn kept saying no Brooke ya'll went out I don't like him. I laughed at her told her she was buts because we went out once there was like nothing there and then we just stayed good friends. I also told her if she didn't agree to a date than I would make sure to find a new apartment leaving her alone with our third roommate who trust me is annoying as hell." She tells him and he just laughs.

"There you go being little Miss Matchmaker." Lucas chuckles.

"I know right. I just figured if two people are completely right for why should it matter if one of them went out with another's friend ya know." Brooke shrugged.

"Yeah…I agree." He nodded since he thought the same thing about him in her in a small way. He always thought him and her were completely right for each other and it didn't matter if everyone else was against it, they were right. But sadly now he knows they weren't.

_And my night's so cold, day's so long__  
__They say you don't know what you got til it's gone__  
__When it's gone and I'm trippin how much I miss it__  
__And you're steady walkin 'round like I never existed__  
__And it's hard to understand, you gotta another plan__  
__Tryin' to play hard and you got another man__  
__But you'll never find another like moi__  
__How you ridin' round in your drop-top car__  
__Baby you're star and it's time that you know it__  
__So much love and it's time now we show it_

Lucas stood there watching her as they fell into a comfortable silence, most the silences they share are comfortable and knowing it was still like that made Lucas smile a little. However that didn't change the fact he wanted to talk to her

"Brooke I want to say something." he tells her and she turns to look at him and he can see all the worry on her face. The worry that is begging him not to make this being around each other awkward "I just don't know if I should."

"If you're not sure maybe you shouldn't say it." She whispers to him because the last thing she needs is one of his famous Lucas Scott speeches that make her go all weak in the knees. She has Adam she loves Adam but that doesn't mean a part of her heart will always belong to Lucas Scott. And that part as much as she hates it will always go stupid when he says something amazingly perfect to her.

"No I just…" he pauses leaning off the counter walking over to her and slipping his hands in hers.

"Lucas please don't." she almost begs shaking her head at him looking down but not pulling her hands away from his.

"I just want you to know that…please look at me." he asks but she just stays looking down, "Brooke…" he whispers lifting her chin to look at him, "I just want you to know that the only thing I have ever wanted is for you to be happy."

"I am happy Lucas. I am really happy."

"I know I can tell. You may have forgotten but I know you pretty well Brooke. So I can tell how happy you are." He smiles sadly as his hand slowly reaches up tucking a lose strand of hair back behind her ear, "I missed you."

"I missed you too." She whispers back to him and he nods leaning in kissing her forehead and making her whole body shake, before giving her a sad smile and heading back out of the kitchen, "Lucas…" she calls and he turns to look at her, "At one point we were really good friends. I don't know how to get there or anything but I would like to maybe someday get back to that."

"Yeah…" he nodded, "I would like that too."

_It's been about a year now__  
__Ain't seen or heard from you__  
__I been missin' you crazy__  
__How do you, how do you sleep?__  
__I found the letter you wrote me__  
__It still smells just like you__  
__Damn those sweet memories__  
__How do you, how do you sleep?_

_

* * *

_

**So there is the new chapter and I know ya'll may think Brooke is just giving into him and letting go of the past but she isn't she just doesn't want things to be weird while he is there.**

**But review the chapter and the more reviews the faster the update **

**:D**


	5. Didn't You Know How Much I Love You?

_I remember the way you made love to me_  
_Like I was all you'd ever need__  
__Did you change your mind__  
__Well I didn't change mine__  
__Now here I am trying to make sense of it all__  
__We were best friends now we don't even talk__  
__You broke my heart__  
__Ripped my world apart_

_The weather isn't too great. The rain is coming down hard and it really is hard to see anything. Brooke has no clue how her boyfriend is even able to see a thing. They just got out of a movie and of course the movie ran late so though she was supposed to be home 30 minutes ago she isn't. That is one rule her mom has, be home on time. On curfew and she doesn't want Brooke in the driveway, doesn't want her coming up the street or on the doorstep, she wants her in the house at 1 during weekdays and 2 on the weekends. Well it's Thursday and when she looks seeing that it's approaching 2 she knows she is so screwed._

"_Just tell her the movie ran late." Lucas said as they changed lanes. He knew how her mom was about curfew and it didn't help that Cam was still not exactly happy for them._

"_Luke you know how she is and it doesn't help that Cam is still being a small ass about it all. God only knows what he will say when I show up almost an hour late." She groans slamming back into her seat._

"_The truth. Brooke we weren't even doing anything, we went to a movie. Why don't you try calling her again?" he suggested not really getting why she will get in trouble, she called her mom didn't pick up. What more could she do._

"_Damn it!" Brooke cursed as her phone started beeping almost dead. Could this night get worse, everything that could go wrong has and this was her first date out with Lucas since they got back together, she wanted to do this right. Wanted her mom to trust them out and not worry and showing up late will make her worry and a little pissed, "My phone is dead do you have yours?" she asked._

"_Yeah." He nodded pulling his eyes away from the road for what seemed a millisecond to get his phone from his pocket._

"_Lucas!" Brooke screamed as a bright light flashed into the dark car with loud screeching of tires. The whole moment was silent. There was no screaming, there was no loud noises. It was almost as if everything that was happening was on mute. The car spun on the wet road spinning in circles before skidding of the road flipping. Two flips that all it was just two and as soon as the window crashed next to her she felt a gust of wind take over. The once warm car filled with wet cold air as the car finally came to a stop slamming into a tree bring it all to a halt._

_Didn't you know how much I loved you__  
__Didn't you know how much I loved you, baby__  
__I gave you everything, every part of me__  
__Didn't you feel it when I touched you__  
__Didn't I rock you when I loved you, baby__  
__Baby, tell me__  
__Didn't you know how much I loved you__  
_

Brooke eyes shot open to the dim light coming in from her window. She felt her heart racing and tear filled eyes and shook her head trying to forget it all, trying to forget the haunting of something she should for the life of her regret but still didn't. She should tell herself loving him was wrong, being with him was wrong but she just never seemed to convince herself of it fully. Every time she would think she did something would happen, a song would come on, or a saying someone said that made her mind race back to him. Of thoughts of him.

He is a part of her for reason then she would like to admit but he is. He was her first everything, first love, first person she gave her whole body too, her whole heart too, he was her first heartbreak, first tear she cried over a boy and she hated him for all those things. She hates him for making her feel so terrible that night she found out and she hates the fact he has been here a day and her mind has been completely consumed of thoughts of him. She has a boyfriend, she loves that boyfriend but for some reason she just can't get the brooding blonde out of her head.

"Please get out of my head." she mumbled to herself throwing her sheets off her. All she wanted was a night that didn't make her think of him, a night where she just slept normal and if she must dream it be about her current boyfriend, not her former.

Rolling over she noticed Jason snuggled against a pillow asleep. He really is a big teddy bear, a super cute teddy bear that she loves just as much as her own brother. Leaning over kissing his cheek he smiles a little mumbling something and then drifting back to sleep.

Crawling out of her bed Brooke stumbles into the kitchen to make some coffee figuring she would just go out for breakfast since she didn't feel like cooking when Quinn wasn't there mainly because Lucas was right yesterday, she still did suck.

Putting on 8 cups, she walked over to her purse digging through it until she found exactly what she was looking for. She should throw it out, give it away but she can't, no matter how much she wants too the small chain will always be in her purse. It's a tiny piece of metal, melted down into a ridge shape of a heart with a small engraving in the back,

'_One Last Time'_

Three words, three tiny words with suck an amazing strong meaning to her. The metal was from his old mustang. He loved that car, he loved it more than anything and she still remembered that night like it was yesterday, it was probably one of the scariest nights of her life.

_I can't get you out of my head__  
__I still feel you in this bed__  
__Left me all alone__  
__You couldn't be more gone__  
__From falling apart to fighting mad__  
__From wanting you back to not giving a damn__  
__I've felt it all__  
__I've been to the wall_

_Brooke felt her head pound with pain. She heard nothing but the rain outside soaking into the car. Her eyes flickered open slowly before shutting again. Her whole body was hurting and when she opened her eyes once more she felt the dash board tight against her legs._

"_Oww…" Brooke winced in pain as she pushed her chair back having the dash board dig into her leg the whole time moving, "God…" she growled placing her hand to her head pulling back to see a small steady stream of blood flow down, "Luke?" she called looking over not to see him next to her, "Lucas!" she called again sliding of her seat trying to open up her jammed door, "Damn it!" she cursed slamming her body over and over into it before pulling herself out of the broken window._

_Standing up out of the car she felt all the glass fall from her body and her wrist getting a shot of pain."Lucas!" she called again looking through the dark rainy night._

"_Miss are you all ok?" she heard someone call and turned to look up at a man standing on the road._

"_I...I don't know…I can't find him, why can't I find him?" she begged the man at the top of the hill to tell her._

"_The ambulance is on its way. My wife called; are you hurt?"_

"_I can't find him…" she mumbled to herself as she walked around the car, "Lucas!" she called as tears burned in her eyes._

"_Sweetie why don't you come up the hill!" she heard what she guessed was the wife called but they didn't get it. She couldn't come up the hill she needed him, she needed to find him._

"_I can't..." she again mumbled to herself not even sure the people heard her._

"_I will come down and get you." the man called as he started to slowly make his way down the muddy incline. "Are you ok?" he asked again reaching her._

"_No my head…my head and wrist hurts…" she tells him as her eyes move through the dark night, "Where is he? Is he up there with you?" she asked the man with wide eyes begging for him to tell her he was up there._

"_Who? Who are you looking for?"_

"_It's his car. I mean I was in his car. He wouldn't leave me there. He wouldn't leave me." she kept repeating as he helped her up the hill._

"_Oh my god!" she heard the woman yell and Brooke's head jerked up to see a figure in the road laying completely still._

"_Lucas!!" she screamed taking off towards him ignoring the calls of the man and woman calling her back. Telling her she needed to not see whatever she was about to see. Yet she ignored it, she ignored all of it as her body fell down next to him, "Lucas wake up!" she cried running her hand over his cut up face, "please wake up…baby please wake up!" she begged not sure if the water dripping from her face was tears or the rain, "Come on wake up! I need you please don't leave me I need you!" she cried trying desperately to stop the blood from his head to stop, "Broody wake up please. I love you…god I love you so much please don't leave me!" she whispered cradling his body against hers._

_She heard a faint sound escape his mouth and she swears it was the best noise she has ever heard, "Luke…" she smiled some when his eye flickered open to look at her._

"_Hey Pretty Girl." His voice cracked and she saw the pain as he moved some._

"_God baby your ok…you're going to be ok I promise." She kept telling him running her hand over his face, "You're going to be ok..."_

"_You think…" he spoke swallowing hard for a second, "You think this gets you out of trouble for missing curfew." He chuckles a little then wincing in pain._

"_Yeah Broody I think this definitely gets me out of trouble." She laughs a little leaning in kissing the top of his head as she heard the ambulance sirens._

"_I love you." he whispers slowly reaching his shaking hand up to touch her cheek._

"_I love you too." She cried out a little, "and I'm sure I will love you forever."_

_One day justice will come and find you__  
__And I'll be right there in your memory to remind you_

_Didn't you know how much I loved you__  
__Didn't you know how much I loved you, baby__  
__I gave you everything, every part of me__  
__Didn't you feel it when I touched you__  
__Didn't I rock you when I loved you, baby__  
__Baby, tell me_

The 5 minutes of him not talking to her was probably the scariest moments of her life. Still to this day nothing has compared to the feeling she got that night on that hard wet ground. Yet even as scary as that was one thing that came from that scary night was Cam turned around. He got better, he freaked at the thought of losing his best friend and something changed. He was ok with them together; he was happy for them and soon turned into their biggest cheerleader you might say.

The necklace came a few weeks after she moved here. At first she had the small piece of metal on a silk black ribbon that she wore all the time. Lucas gave it to her at first just something saying how it was the two things he loved most. His car, and her and when she had this necklace she would always have his whole heart. She gave it back to him after she left. Then a few weeks after she got here came a package with not letter, no card no nothing just the small heart necklace and with the new engraving on the back.

'_One Last Time.' _

Why she still had it she didn't know, maybe it was because it was a piece of him she would always have, or may it was because she liked feeling she still had his whole heart or maybe it's just because at the end of the day she did have Lucas Scott's heart and as much as she can give it to Adam Lucas will always have a piece of hers. A piece she could never get back no matter how much she tried, not matter how much she begged for it back he would always have it and truth is even if she would never admit it to herself she doesn't

_Didn't you know how much I loved you__  
__Didn't you know how much I loved you, baby__  
__I gave you everything, every part of me__  
__Didn't you feel it when I touched you__  
__Didn't I rock you when I loved you, baby__  
__Baby, tell me__  
__I gave you everything, every part of me_

_

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_

**SO this chapter has taken forever to update and not only that but is so crappy and short. It is totally a filler and I just need it for an upcoming chapter which will be up so soon I promise!! I so totally promise!!**

**Well please review**

**:D**


	6. One Last Time'

_I wanna lay in your bed__  
__Stare in your eyes__  
__Feel your heart beating with mine__  
__One Last Time...__  
__One Last Time..._

_She didn't know what she was doing, nor what she was thinking, but here she was walking up the steps to the one thing she has been avoiding all week. She is leaving in the morning, she could have easily just gone back to her house crawl into her bed and wake up in the morning and be gone. She should be doing that but it's like she isn't in control of her body anymore. That even with her head yelling this is the biggest mistake coming here, her feet won't listen, her heart won't listen and with a shake hand she reach up tapping on the door to the place she never really wanted to come to again._

_She hears the shuffle of feet and she knows it's him. It's late real late and he was probably asleep. He was probably lost in some dream world that for the last few months has been so much better than the reality hell they have both been in._

"_What?!" he growled opening the door but just like every other time he sees her that growl and hard face softens. Those blue eyes seem to lighten up even if it's only for a second before dimming again. He does look tired and that makes her feel more then guilty again. Her brother told her he wasn't sleeping well, just wondered the apartment all night and that was clearly written all over his face. His eyes are heavy; his face is almost dead looking with two very dark circles under his eyes. His hair she loved to run her hands through was now going every way and his body that still seemed to burn for her touch was weighed down, like the whole world had crashed around him and the piece laid heavy on every part of him._

_He just stood there staring at her clearly not expecting her to be on his doorstep when he heard the knock, yet at the same time more than happy to see her. He wanted to reach out and touch her, just to make sure she was there, was really in his doorstep but he held back the urge for fear she might not be there and wake up from another dream he wished was real. _

_So now he stood there studying her, studying her face, her body, everything just so when he woke up and she was gone, out of his life he would still be able to close his eyes and see her. She did look gorgeous, but then again when did she not. Her chocolate locks hung down, her eyes though seemed sad seemed to still have the sparkle in them they always do and when he saw her move shifting from one foot to the other he questioned his sanity on the fact she seemed more then real, she seemed more than just a dream._

_Then it all became a reality that she was there when her perfect lips, her perfect lips he hadn't felt against his in what seemed like a lifetime just said one word, one simple word, "Hi…"_

"Brooke…" Rachel said for about the millionth time since they have been sitting here, "Seriously when Adam is around you may not want to stare at your ex so much." She tells her and see's her best friend head jerk to look at her.

"What? I wasn't looking at him." Brooke protest but seeing both her friend shake their heads at her.

"Lie 1." Quinn said grabbing some sun tan lotion rubbing it on her arms and stomach.

"Guys really I wasn't I was just staring out into space and Lucas just happened to be in that line of viewing." She shrugged.

"Lie 2." Quinn says again handing the lotion to Rachel, "So instead of striking out with a third lie tell us what you are thinking? How you are feeling."

Brooke sits for a second staring out at the beach trying to not look at him but couldn't help it when her eyes locked onto him. "You know that awkward moment when you have a one night stand thinking you will never see them again and then all of a sudden you do?" she asked but keeping her eyes on Lucas as he laughed throwing the football with his friends and Clay.

"Umm…well we know that awkward moment…" Quinn says waving her hand between her and Rachel, "But how do you?"

"Oh my god Brooke did you sleep with Matt or Jason?!" Rachel freaked looking down at the boys then back at her best friend.

"What? No!" Brooke said quickly rolling her eyes. God her friends are dumb thinking she would ever sleep with one of the guys. Dating one of her brother's best friends was enough.

"Then what are you talking about?" Rachel asked really confused.

"Ok so for months I knew I was moving. And for month Lucas would show up at my house begging to fix us. Begging for me to give him a second chance and god I wanted too. Some days I honestly almost did because though I hate it I loved that boy so damn much." She frowns a little.

"We know you did Brookie." Rachel said in a soothing tone rubbing her friends back.

"It's just…it's just every time I would think about it I would just see him and her. Just see him in bed with her and touching her and god it made my skin crawl. I honestly got where I couldn't stand him touching me because it made me think of them." She says the last part with anger once again just thinking about it.

_There won't be any tears__  
__That's not why I'm here.__  
__Baby, turn out the lights and lets disappear.__  
__One Last Time...__  
__One Last Time..._

"So since you have a past relationship its weird?" Quinn questions.

"That and…" she trailed off looking back up at Lucas who just happens to look at her the same time. They hold each other gaze longer then both should until Cam throws the football. Lucas catches it then looks back at her but when he does she has turned back away.

"And what?"

"And maybe the fact we slept together the night before I left…" she cringes knowing both her friends were about to freak out on her.

"Brooke!!!" they both yell together and see she knew it.

"_Hi…" he smiles a little not sure if he was supposed to let her in, or stand here, not sure if she came to see Cam or him. He knew she was leaving in the morning; of course he wanted to see her before she left but figured he was the last person she would ever want to see. "Cam isn't here. I mean I don't know if you are looking for him…" he kind of trailed off then all of a sudden realizing it was past one in the morning, "Wait its really late are you ok? Did your car break down or something because I know you may want Cam but I could look at it." he offered._

"_Can I…can I just come in?" she asked._

"_Yeah of course." He nodded moving to the side so she could walk in before shutting the door. She just stood there for a moment, not moving not speaking just standing there and as she stood there, there was only one thing she wanted to do so she did it._

_As wrong as it was, as truly wrong she walked up pushing her lips against his. She felt the shock in his kiss but quickly joined placing both his hands on her cheeks stumbling back against the wall. His tongue darted into her mouth missing her taste more than he ever thought. She tasted just she always did, her lips felt just as they always felt but in the same it was the most amazing feeling he felt. Pulling away still holding on to her cheeks leaning his forehead against hers they both stood still, hearts racing, breathing heavy._

"_This is goodbye." Brooke whispers to him and sees his eyes clench tight at her words, "One last time."_

"_Brooke I…" he starts but she just places her finger to his lips silencing him._

"_One last time." she repeats and after a long pause him slowly nodding yes whispering back, "One last time."_

"Look I don't know what happened ok. I don't know why I went over I know I shouldn't have but I don't know I couldn't leave not seeing him. So I went over and I didn't plan it, I mean going over there it wasn't to sleep with him. It was like closure I thought or something. Like I don't know all ya'll talk about break up sex I guess that was ours."

"Brooke you and Lucas can never and I repeat never have break up sex!" Rachel yells.

"Why? You have told me about the guys you have dated and had break up sex why can't me and Lucas?"

"Because you are Brooke and Lucas!" Rachel said like it was so obvious, "Brooke the guys I had break up sex with or whatever you want to call it I never loved. I never missed them or wanted them back. Do you honestly think for a second if me and Cam broke up I would ever do that with him?"

"I don't know." Brooke shrugged shaking her head.

"No I wouldn't because I love him so much. I could see myself being with him forever and I know you saw that with you and Lucas. Say it was young love that it was nothing but it was. It was full of passion and need and want. It was all fighting for each other, fighting with each other and just being in love."

"Rachel I thought you hated Lucas?"

"I hated cheating Lucas." she told her because there was a major difference, "I loved the honest one. The one you changed from drinking all the time to going months without touching anything. I loved the person you made him become because you did change him for the better Brooke."

"We both changed for each other." She shrugged, "Do ya'll want to know the truth?" she asked and they both nod, "It wasn't break up sex, it wasn't closure. It was the fact I went months without him and I missed him. I missed him so much and I just needed to feel him. I need to feel the feeling I got by being with him just one more time."

_I'm not here to fight__  
__About who's wrong or right__  
__I just want your kiss__  
__I wanna feel just like this__  
__One Last Time...__  
__One Last Time..._

"_Brooke I…" Lucas paused as he laid on top of her. This was wrong, this wasn't right. Did he want to be with her? More than anything but he wasn't sure he could handle having her again after all this time just to lose her again._

"_Please Lucas...don't say anything." She begged, "I don't want to fight about anything anymore. I just want…" she trails off cursing herself for feeling her eyes burn. She wasn't going to cry. It was pointless to cry over this. _

"_Just want what?" he asked brushing her hair out of her face, "Pretty Girl just tell me what you want. You know I will do anything you want." he promises her._

"_Why can't this just be it?" she asks sniffing a little and pulling back in her tears, "Why can't we just be together one more time and it be over? I just want all this to be over Luke." Her voice cracks._

_She sees the hurt spread across his face but he doesn't say anything about it. He buries his head above her shoulder and in his pillow kissing down on her shoulder gently before slowly sliding into her._

"_Uhh…" she gasp almost forgetting this feeling of him, almost forgetting how his naked body felt against hers, and closed her eyes tight as they rocked together and him whispering, "I'll do whatever you want."_

_Your breath on my neck__  
__I don't wanna forget the smell of your skin.__  
__Touch me again.__  
__One Last Time..._

"Brooke I feel like that would just break you more. Even if you wanted it all, I feel like that night just crushed you a little more." Quinn told her honestly and Brooke nodded agreeing.

"I umm…" she paused taking in a deep breath and blinking a few times, "I thought that maybe it would happen but so much time had passed I wouldn't feel anything anymore. That I wouldn't feel hate, love, pain. That it would just be nothing, I would feel nothing."

"Did it work?" Rachel asked but knew it was a pointless question since her look told her all.

"Not even a little." Brooke told her as a single tear slipped down her cheek, "I should have known better. I mean its Lucas. I could never just have no strings attached sex with him and feel nothing. Plus he didn't do it right. He didn't play it right. He was supposed to just let me do it all and him be quiet and him not say anything. Not call me his Pretty Girl, or his baby or his anything. He wasn't supposed to kiss me like he was trying to convince me to stay and he wasn't supposed to…" her voice breaks and she shakes her head trying to get the memory out of her head, get the words out of her head.

"He wasn't supposed to what?" Quinn asked rubbing her back but Brooke kept shaking her head no not wanting to hear the words again.

Yet Rachel knew what was said. It was Lucas and Brooke so she knew he was going to say everything to keep her so he told her the one thing he knew would make her question everything, "He said he loved you."

_Cause I'm not here to fight__  
__About who's wrong or right__  
__I just want your kiss__  
__I want to feel just like this.__  
__One Last Time...__  
__One Last Time..._

_The whole apartment was silent. Unless you were in the room down the hall you wouldn't know that anyone was there. Yet even that room was quiet. There were small gasp but nothing like it normally was. Brooke never said his name, she never made a noise that she knew he loved hearing. She couldn't, if she felt the feeling build up in her throat she swallowed it, she bit down on his shoulder she did anything just not to release the sound._

_She knew he knew she was doing it, she knew that he knew every time her nails racked down his back it was an inner moan of want for him, but she also knew he was trying anything he could to get it to escape her lips. His speed would increase as if he was about to hit his point but he would just slow down after sometime like he was begging his body to continue on forever. That his mind and heart knew this would be the last time he got to hold her, touch her, feel her and that those two things were trying to get his body to understand that._

_He pulled back to look at her and gave her the look she was not wanting to see. She hated that look, well actually she loved that look but she didn't want to see it now, she didn't want to see it ever again. She turned her head away from him to avoid the look but he of course being him cupped her cheek turning her to look back at him before leaning back down and capturing her lips with his. _

_He kissed down her cheek stopping at her ear and she heard him swallow hard, she felt his hand shaking as it ran up her body and whispering, "I love you so much Pretty Girl" she felt her heart spend up as his movements went quicker and she knew it was almost over. He wasn't able to stop himself anymore and she felt his heart break when he hit his point._

_A tear escaped her eyes as it slipped down her cheek both still staying still. She felt his nose graze over her ear and she swears she felt a small tear on his part drop on her shoulder, "Please…Please baby don't ever forget that."_

"Lucas doesn't say I love you." Brooke tells them all, "He never says it to anyone. I was the first person he ever said it too and still he never over used it. I use to get this feeling…" she tells them swallowing hard again and giving up all hope of trying to stop her tears, "When he would say it I would feel this amazing feeling inside because I knew he meant it. I knew he would never say it unless he meant it and when Lucas stops feeling something he doesn't continue saying things because well he just doesn't." she shrugs, "So it just sucked that I knew he meant it. That after all that time he still felt it."

"Did you still feel it?" Quinn asked.

Brooke sat there no really having to think about the question and her answer because she knew the answer. She just had to figure out the way to get it out of her mouth without completely breaking and having her voice crack. Yet that part was way harder so she just bit her bottom trembling lip and nodded her head yes as she looked up at the boy in question.

"I'm going to ask you something Brooke." Rachel said knowing Brooke will hate her but having to ask, "You are going to hate me completely for asking. I know you are going to give me that look you give and I know that you will try to convince me otherwise but I need you to be honest. I need you to look inside yourself and just be honest."

"Alright I will be."

"You really love Adam right?" She questioned and wasn't really surprised that Brooke didn't even have to think about it.

"I love him Rachel. I love that boy so much." Brooke tells her honestly because that is true. She loves Adam so much. He is great to her, treats her right and really when she sees him her whole day is better. She kind of wishes he was here now since that would make the stupid tears stop.

"Ok I kind of guessed but the next thing I am going to ask will piss you off but I am going to ask anyway." Rachel tells her and Brooke sits there bracing herself for the question, "I know your biggest fear of getting back with Lucas all that time back was to get hurt again. That you couldn't trust him again and that he would cheat again. But I guess my question is if you could see the future and see that if you got back with him he would never hurt you again. He would never cheat again and he would seriously spend the rest of his life making things right for you just because you gave him that second chance, who would you be with then?"

Brooke was a little taken back from the question; she opened her mouth to say something but then closed it to think more. She really wasn't expecting that one. How could anyone really expect their best friend to throw that question at them. So she just choose to answer the best way she could, "I love Adam." She settled on.

"Yeah I know you do." Rachel nods knowing her best friend was avoiding her question completely but she knew Brooke had to be honest with it, "But what I don't know is if you love Lucas more."

_Brooke laid next to him and felt his arms tight around her. She knew he fought most the night not wanting to go to sleep and she also knew that when she fell asleep first he probably just stared down at her. Watched her sleep. It was still early morning and she needed to get home because her plane would be leaving soon. She rolled back over in his arms and thanked everything her Lucas slept like a dead person._

_Unless she woke him up unless she liked kicked him or on something he would stay out like I light. And for the first time she was thankful for that. Climbing out of his arms she pulled on her jeans and just because it was warmer and she loved it put in his old zip up black fleece jacket. It was always so warm, she never got why he never wore the thing and it was probably because it was a little too small for him or something. But for her it fit perfectly. It was really big on her but that's why she loved it. _

_She felt the tear slip out of her eye and down her cheek as she took her necklace from her jean pocket and flipping it in her hand rubbing the small piece of metal with her thumb and laying it on the night stand next to his phone._

_Leaning over kissing softly on his cheek she gave a small broken hearted smile whispering, "Bye Broody." And then she left._

_And then when you fall asleep__  
__I'll kiss your cheek__  
__Whisper goodnight__  
__I'll just leave__  
__One Last Time_

_

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_

**Review :D**


	7. Breakeven'

**So when I first heard this song I thought about writing this story. I don't know I thought it fit perfect and thought for a little while naming the story Breakeven but clearly I didn't hehe. But here is my new chapter and I hope my loves love it!**

**Also if you want to see the hotness which is Adam visit this link**

**http : / / f e a t u r e s . o u t i n a m e r i c a . c o m / w p – c o n t e n t / g a l l e r y / t y l e r – b a c h t e l / t y l e r- b a c h t e l 7 . j p g**

**Just put all of it together**

**That is Brooke's boyfriend and personally I am so more for him then CMM well Lucas haha**

**So damn hot!**

**If it doesn't show up go to my profile and I'll put him up along with Cam, Jason and Matt**

**:D**

**Own nothing!**

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_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing,__  
__Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in,_

The smile that spread across Brooke's face when she woke up was inevitable. She was so happy, beyond happy and couldn't wait for the day to start. Today they were going to Adam's game, well she was she really didn't care what everyone else did. She missed her boyfriend even though it had only been a day since she saw him but still that was a long day not seeing the boy she loved.

Jumping out of her bed she skipped into the kitchen already finding the entire apartment up.

"Hello people I love." She smiled big as she started making herself a cup of coffee, "Isn't today perfect? I mean really this weather is gorgeous." She grinned looking out her window at the beach.

"Yeah Brookie it's nice." Matt agreed tossing a glance at Cam who just shrugged not getting his sister's skipping mood. Brooke maybe chipper 99% of the time but she normally isn't skipping, goofy smile, loving the weather chipper.

"You ok B?" Cam asked raising his eyebrow at his sister who spun around too look at him yet still with a giddy smile.

"Of course big brother why wouldn't I be?" She smiled more leaning up against this counter behind her sipping on her coffee.

"Well you are just extremely…" Cam trailed off trying to find the right word.

"_Cheery._" Lucas commented finishing his best friend's thought as he ate some of his breakfast.

"Well that's because it's a great day." Brooke shrugged not even noticing the nickname her ex gave her, not even gave her he has been calling her that since they met; "I mean why wouldn't I be happy on a great day like this. Did I mention the weather?"

"Yeah Brooke you mentioned the weather." Rachel shook her head as she stirred her spoon around her cereal, "So Brooke what you going to take us to do today?"

"Well my very best friend I am going to a certain baseball game today since my amazingly gorgeous boyfriend is playing." She informed them all missing the falling of a certain blondes face, "Now I would like you all to come but if you don't Cam has a key so go and come as your please." She shrugged finishing the last of her coffee.

"If you want us to go Brookie we will go." Jason smiled and Brooke gave a happy wink over at him glad he agreed.

"Well good. I have to leave in an hour so if you would like to all come please be ready." Brooke said placing her coffee cup in the sink reaching over the counter and grabbing a piece of bacon from Lucas's hand, "Thank you Broody." She popped it in her mouth as she skipped out again missing the look on his face.

'_Broody_' he thought, he hadn't heard that in awhile and it made him smile she called him that. Maybe they were making progress.

_Coz I got time while she got freedom,__  
__'Coz when a heart breaks__  
__no it don't break even._

Brooke hummed along to the music as she drove down the road to Adam's game. She was going to text him earlier but knew their coach had this rule where the night before games they had to have their phones off to be ready and focused. Now of course Adam broke the rule some nights and text her or called to tell her goodnight but last night she didn't get to talk to him. She really hadn't seen him since everyone got here and she hated it.

His school had made him busier then she liked and his ball practice wasn't helping but today was going to be perfect. She was going to watch him play, then he was going to come to the pool with her and everyone and then just the two of them were going out to dinner.

Today she didn't care what anyone else wanted to do because today was their day.

"Hello?" Brooke sung happily into her phone, "Hey Quinn!" She smiled even more talking to her roommate.

"You think she is going to be this overly excited the whole time we are here?" Cam whispered to his best friends as they sat in the back.

"I don't mind. I think it's cute." Lucas smiled as he glanced back up at the driver's seat hearing Brooke laugh at something Quinn was telling her.

"Luke she could be cussing out orphans and you would still think it's cute." Jason rolled his eyes since everyone knew no matter what Brooke did; Lucas would smile at. He would agree with anything she did just for the hope of getting her back, well at least her friendship.

"Dude shut up." Lucas said punching him in the arm getting a laugh from the back of the car.

"God Luke this trip is either going to be the best thing for you or the worst." Matt shook his head falling back in his seat as Lucas looked back up at the front of the car not letting him know he agreed completely.

"Yes sweetie I will be there soon. I am actually pulling into the parking lot now." Brooke said hitting her left blinker so she could turn.

"_Good because they are warming up and I am bored. Plus you will not guess who is here?" Quinn said._

"Do I want to know?_"_

"_Probably not. It's a short blonde with a new bob hair cut and just happened to call a certain Adam Hamilton at one point boyfriend." Quinn told her rolling her eyes at the skank trying to talk to the clearly not caring Adam._

"That slut!" Brooke yelled getting everyone to turn and look at her, "Sorry not talking about any of ya'll." She apologized waving her head and everyone just slowly nodded an ok, "What is she doing there? Doesn't she know today is mine and his day!?"

'Mine and his day' Lucas mouthed to Matt who shrugged not knowing either what that meant.

"_I think she does hence why she is here. God Brooke please hurry she is walking over to me, love you bye._" _Quinn said quickly into the phone as the skank walked over, "Hi Kender." She miss spoke her name._

Brooke hung up with a laugh as she heard her correct Quinn saying Kimber. Quinn actually hated her almost more than Brooke because after she and Adam got together Kimber threw herself at Clay, while he was dating Quinn.

"Brooke you ok?" Lucas asked as she slammed her phone in the cup holder.

"What is wrong with blonde skanks!? I mean really I do not see the appeal at all for a skinny short skank with twig legs and stupid haircuts." She growled not getting why Kimber was at _her_ boyfriend's game. She wasn't dating anyone on the team so she shouldn't be there.

"I don't know. Luke what is the appeal of blonde skanks?" Rachel smirked looking at him burn holes in her from the back seat.

"Rachel…" Cam warned but all were surprised when Brooke jumped in.

"Ok Rachel I love you but I don't want past being brought up. The past is the past and we all have moved on." Brooke said wanting to lay the cards out on the table now before she was around Adam because she didn't want her past with Lucas being brought up around him, she didn't want to remind him of the little fact her ex was staying with her.

Lucas wasn't sure if he should smile at that comment or frown. Now of course the fact he didn't have to hear about Rachel's little comment made him want to smile big but then the fact Brooke said they had moved on, now that one sucked.

"But again back to my point!" Brooke freaked again changing her mood quick again, "She is not his anymore! He is mine and here she goes just showing up in his face again."

"Brooke none of us have a clue what you're talking about." Matt laughed a little.

"Adam's ex!" She snapped like they should know that, "I mean she is his _ex_ meaning she doesn't need to be around. She just needs to disappear because once you break up that's what happens. You don't loom around while the person he loves isn't around! Why would he let her come?"

"Brooke I'm not trying to overstep because I don't really know Adam at all but don't you think maybe he didn't invite her?" Cam tried to reason knowing his sister jumped to her boyfriend cheating right away now since Lucas. He honestly still hated his best friend a little for doing that to his sister. Yeah they fixed their relationship but it wasn't easy. Especially when Cam first found out.

_Her best days will be some of my worst,__  
__She finally met a man that's gonna put her first,__  
__While I'm wide awake, she's no trouble sleeping,__  
__'Coz when a heart breaks__  
__no it don't break even, even no.__  
_

"_Lucas!" Cam slammed the front door of his apartment as he threw his stuff down looking for said roommate and supposed to be best friend. He searched his entire apartment for the blonde finding him laying face down on his bed beer bottles scattered along the floor, "You bastard!" he yelled yanking him from his bed not letting him speak as he reared back punching him in the face._

_Cam has never been violent in his whole 23 years. He has only struck two people his whole life. One being a guy in high school and two being his best friend, both of the times were because of his sister. He beat some kid up in high school for grabbing his little sister's butt and then the time he found out about his best friend and little sister and again now._

"_How could you do that to her!?" he screamed punching his friend again, "She is my little sister! She is my little sister and she loves you sorry ass!" he reminded him as his fist connected with him again, "You crushed her; you cheated on my baby sister! You son of a bitch!" he yelled pulling back to hit him again yet when he did he stopped, "Why aren't you fighting back?" he asked knowing his best friend, knowing his temper and knowing even when he is wrong he doesn't let people hit him._

"_Get off me." Was all he growled shoving his friend back as he got off his bed face swollen, blood coming from his lip and dragging his feet into his kitchen._

"_What is wrong with you!?" Cam demanded to know as he followed him seeing his friend open the fridge pulling out another beer, "Don't you think alcohol has screwed things up enough?"_

"_Doesn't matter now does it!?" Lucas threw his hands in the air stumbling back as he did, "Doesn't matter what I drink. Doesn't matter anything because she is gone!" he yelled looking at the beer in his hand before taking it throwing it at the wall smashing just above his best friend's head, "I tried calling her!" he slurred, "I called over and over and over and she wouldn't answer!"_

"_So that makes it ok to cheat on her!?"_

"_No!" Lucas yelled, "I left message after message but did she call me back? Nope." He shook his head, "So I went out. I went out got drunk and it happened. Do I wish it didn't?! Every second of every fucking day but I can't change it!" he screamed walking over to his roommate, "So hit me." He asked standing in front of him, "Hit me!" he yelled and Cam did as he asked pulling back punching him again, "Doesn't even hurt." Lucas shrugged pushing past him towards his bedroom._

"_Did you even love her?" Cam yelled and saw Lucas freeze at his bedroom door before turning to look at him, "Because even if you were drunk I don't see how if you loved her you would ever cheat!"_

_Cam was more than sure he had never seen the pure hate he saw in his friend's eyes as he made his way towards him and before he could stop him punching him, "I maybe a piece of shit and I may have never deserved her but don't you ever tell me I didn't love her!!"_

"_Well cheating is a clear sign." Cam challenged and stepped towards his friend again._

"_Stop." They both heard a broken voice call turning to see a very emotional looking Brooke. Her hair was in a pony tail, eyes still red and puffy; she had on long gym pants with a plain white t-shirt on. She looked like a mess to Cam as he saw a mixture of pissed off and hurt in her eyes, yet to Lucas she looked beautiful._

"_Brooke…" Lucas's lips pulled into a small smile as he took a step towards her yet she just stepped back waving her hand at him to stop._

"_Cameron I told you not to do that!" she hissed looking at her ex's face, "I told you to leave it alone!" She knew as soon as her brother found out it would be bad, she knew it was going to end like this. That is why she came by when Rachel's told her but clearly she got here a little late._

"_Brooke he deserved it! He-"_

"_I know what he did Cam." She growled not needing to hear it again, "Trust me I know. I saw it." She whispered the last part to herself closing her eyes cursing when she saw it all over again._

"_Pretty Girl.." Lucas whispered reaching for her hating she was in pain. Hating he hurt her._

"_Don't…don't call me that." She growled a little not wanting to hear it, not wanting to hear anything he really had to say, "Let's just…let's get you cleaned up. Cam get some stuff and go home." _

"_No! This is my place too and just because he was a drunken ass doesn't mean I have to leave!" _

"_Cameron!" Brooke growled not in the mood to argue with anyone, "He has nowhere else to go ok! And I know you two can't be stuck in this place alone together so get some damn stuff and go!" She snapped, "Please."_

"_Fine." Cam agreed seeing in his sister's face arguing with him was the last thing she wanted to be doing, hell cleaning up Lucas was probably the last thing she wanted to doing right along with being here. He knew she only came here to stop him from doing something stupid, so he also knew being here was not what she wanted to be doing._

"_Lucas come on." Brooke shook her head at him exhausted as she grabbed his wrist and started to his bathroom hating when he slide his hand up and laced his fingers through hers. _

_  
__What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you__  
__What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok__  
__I'm falling to pieces__  
__I'm falling to pieces_

"I don't know." Brooke shrugged as she put the car in park and everyone got out and started to head towards the fields.

"Brooke." Lucas called reaching for her hand to look at him and it scared him when she jumped from him, "Sorry…"

"No I'm sorry." She apologized running her hand through her hair shaking her head at herself for being so dumb, "I didn't mean to jump; I just…"

"Brooke…" He stopped her, "The last person you ever have to explain that to is me. I understand."

"Yeah…" She whispered laying her hand on his as he laced his fingers through hers, "I did miss you Luke." She confessed without even thinking after a small silence fell between them.

"I missed you too Pretty Girl." He gave a small smile brushing her hair behind her ear, her closing her eyes and holding her breath as he did, "Trust him Brooke." He whispered and she slowly nodded knowing he was right, "I mean if he can handle the person he loves under the same roof as her ex you should be ok at a crowded ballpark."

"I know but you haven't seen this girl Luke. She-"

"Doesn't hold a candle to you." He again interrupted her loving when she smiled, "Brooke I don't need to see this girl to know she doesn't for a second compare to you. Adam seems like a good guy," he said hating admitting it but knowing all he wanted was for her to be happy and it killed him it was not with him but he could tell Adam made her happy, "He isn't going to hurt you."

"Yeah but I have had a really great guy hurt me before." She told him again cursing herself for being so honest with him, for always just telling him what she was feeling, what she was thinking.

"Nothing about me was great Brooke."

"There is plenty great Luke. I just wasn't the one to make you see that." She offered a small smile leaning up on her tip toes kissing the side of his cheek letting her face rest against his for a second remembering what it felt like. Remembering what it felt to have his hand placed on her hip and his breathing against her cheek, the way he smelled, the way it felt to be in his arms yet again, "Don't be afraid to open your heart up again Lucas." She whispered and felt him nod.

"You don't be either Brooke." He whispered back placing a gentle kiss to her temple taking in the sweet smell of strawberries. He felt her nod against his face and he just prayed she would open up. He hated to think he was the cause for someone as perfect and amazing as Brooke to never find love again, to never open her heart to it.

Brooke hesitated a second from pulling away from him. She didn't know why she did but she just wanted to remember what it felt like a little longer until she heard her best friend calling her.

"Brooke come on!" Rachel called not knowing what was happening between the two ex lovers but knowing when it came to Lucas Brooke had way too much of a soft spot.

"I'll umm…" Brooke pulled away from Lucas and he nodded knowing what she was thinking.

"Yeah go ahead." He offered a smile releasing his hands from her hips and it bothered Brooke how her body seemed to miss his touch.

"Yeah." Brooke nodded walking away knowing his eyes were on her the whole way she walked.

"Ok what the hell was that?" Rachel asked as soon as the brunette got next to her.

"What was what?" Brooke played dumb as Rachel looped her arm through Brooke's.

"What was that with Lucas, Brooke?" She asked a little annoyed Brooke was trying to act like it was nothing.

"Rachel I was just talking to him it was nothing I swear." Brooke rolled her eyes not sure she was trying to convince herself of that little fact or her best friend. But even not knowing the answer for real still tossing a glance behind her at her ex who was walking behind her, "I need to find my boyfriend."

"Luke what was that?" Matt questioned as they all waited for their friend who took a little too long to say something to a certain ex.

"Nothing man." He shrugged and they all gave him a look that gave him a cold chill, "We were just talking. Do you honestly expect me to be down here for the summer and never talk to her?"

"Just depends on what you were talking about." Cam shrugged not wanting Lucas to hurt his sister yet again.

"Nothing you need to worry about ok." Lucas told them somewhat annoyed they were being so dumb. He wasn't going to hurt her again, he wasn't going to do anything to hurt her and if he wanted to talk to her he would, well if she allowed it. Yet then he smiled a little, ok a lot when he saw her walking a few steps ahead of them and tossing a glance over her shoulder at him. He wanted to say it was but he couldn't and he knew she couldn't either because they both knew there was definitely something still there, they were definitely not over fully yet. 

_They say bad things happen for a reason__  
__But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding__  
__'Coz she's moved on while I'm still grieving__  
__And when a heart breaks__  
__no it don't break even, even no._

"Please kill me." Quinn begged her boyfriend, "Please just real quick shoot me in the head because if she talks to me one more time I will shoot her."

"Baby she isn't that bad." Clay laughed shaking his head at his girlfriend's dramatics.

"She isn't that bad?" Quinn asked almost in disbelief, "Clay she threw herself at you when I wasn't around and then when she found out Adam moved on with Brooke he came home to her on his bed in pretty much nothing! That girl is a skank!"

"That I all agree with but she isn't that bad to me because I am not worried about it. Adam and I both know we are not going to do anything with her because we have you and Brooke. You and her are the ones who get so bothered about it."

"Adam stop!" Quinn heard Kimber giggle the most annoying noise she has ever heard looking up to see her talking to Adam. Adam was of course looking all around for who Quinn was sure his girlfriend and Kimber was clearly not getting the hint.

"There she is." Quinn smiled looking up to see her best friend along with the rest of the crew making their way over to them, "Adam!" She yelled as he looked up at her giving her a help me look that made her laugh, "Your girlfriend is here." She called nodding her head towards the brunette who was skipping over to them.

"Thank you." He smiled not even saying anything to Kimber as he started towards her.

"That boy looks amazingly fine in a uniform." Rachel whispered to Brooke not wanting her boyfriend to hear.

"I know it's like that body was made for a uniform." Brooke agreed, "Boyfriend!" She squealed when he got close enough jumping up in his arms wrapping her legs tight around him and kissing hard on the mouth.

"One step forward ten steps back." Jason slapped Lucas on the back who mumbled a 'yeah' agreeing. Yet not admitting the pain that shot through his chest. Seeing Brooke with someone else was definitely going to take a lot to get use too.

"I missed you." Brooke breathed out between kisses truly missing her boyfriend the last days.

"It was only a day." Adam laughed pulling away from their kisses her still in his arms.

"Do you know how long a day is in Brooke time?" She told him tilting her head to the side with a smile.

"I can't say I do but I am guess forever." He said exaggerating the word forever.

"Exactly." She nodded kissing him again completely getting lost in their kiss until she heard someone clear their throat. Turning to see her brother who got a smack from his girlfriend and a death glare, "Sorry." Brooke mumbled slipping down her boyfriend's body to stand on her own.

"Hey everyone." Adam gave a small wave and they all offered a hi.

"Ok you said hi to them but do you know what today is?" Brooke asked pulling him back to her attention.

"Umm…Tuesday." Adam said playing dumb.

"No!" Brooke rolled her eyes.

"Oh is it not Tuesday? I was pretty sure it was." he teased get a laugh from everyone and actually even a small smile from Lucas.

"Adam." Brooke pouted crossing her arms over her chest.

"Here she goes." Lucas mumbled to his best friend knowing that look all too well. It's the pouting, I want to get my way, please let me get my way and please don't tease me look. She use to give him that look all the time.

"Oh Tuesday." Adam said like he just got I smacking his hand to his head, "Like I don't know maybe my anniversary to my gorgeous girlfriend Tuesday." He smiled reaching into his back pocket.

"It is that Tuesday." Brooke smiled like a child twisting her body side to side.

Lucas was pretty sure he just broke a little more. He wasn't even sure why he came on this damn trip because this was all slowly killing him. He wanted her happy he did, but was it selfish he wanted her happy with him? That hearing her going all giggly over her anniversary to her new boyfriend literally made him ill feeling. Was all he feeling wrong?

"Well I got you something but since I didn't wrap it I don't think I can give it to you." Adam shrugged keeping his hand closed behind his back.

"No!" Brooke freaked not caring if it was wrapped or not, "Please give it now please please please!" she begged.

"Only if you can pick the right hand." He teased with both hands behind his back.

"Hmm…" she pondered her choice tapping her chin, "Well I would say your right hand since you are right handed, but…I know you keep your stuff in your left pocket so you can sit so I say that one." She decided pointing at his left hand and eyes grew big when he pulled out the most gorgeous piece of jewelry her eyes have ever lead eyes on.

"Right answer." He smiled loving the look on her face.

"Adam…" Brooke said looking at the ring that was lying in the palm of his hand. It was a pear shaped faint pink diamond with a silver band and two small diamonds on either side of the pink one.

"Holy shit is that a-" Rachel stopped looking over her friends shoulder at the gift in his hand; then tossing a glance at Lucas who had his hand in his pocket and looking down away from them. She was pretty much positive she just heard a heart completely shatter.

"It's a promise ring." Adam said quickly seeing his girlfriend relax at that, "My grandfather gave it to my grandmother on their one year anniversary. Now I know this is only our ten months but he promised that no matter what he was going to take care of her. That she would be his forever and he would never cause her any pain." He said the last part tossing a glance over at the guy behind his girlfriend then back to said girlfriend, "So I thought I would promise the same. Do you like it?"

"Yes!" Brooke agreed quickly grabbing it and putting it on her finger, "Oh my god its perfect!" she grinned a mile long hugging him tight, "I love you so much." She whispered kissing the side of his head then along his face until she reached his lips.

"I love you too." Adam smiled in their kiss, "Who would have thought when you first turned me down we would have been together 10 months." He teased pulling out of their hug.

"Shut up." She laughed pushing him some but still looking at her finger, "Come on I have to show Quinn!" she told him grabbing his hand and taking off.

'10 months,' Lucas shook his head. They had been together longer than that. They had been together a year, well they would have been together a year.

_What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you  
What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok  
I'm falling to pieces, yeah_  
_I'm falling to pieces, yeah_

"_Damn it." Brooke cursed as she tried to open some rubbing alcohol to clean up Lucas's face. Cam really did a number to it._

"_Do you know what today is?" Lucas asked knowing it was dumb since he knew she knew._

"_Thursday." She mumbled lifting her shirt up some to twist the lid, "I swear they make these things so people can't open them." She growled more to herself then him._

"_Brooke…" he took her hand in his and pulled her close to him as he sat on his bed._

"_Lucas stop." She begged but it was almost like she was begging him not to. Like she was saying it because it was what she was supposed to say not what she really wanted._

"_It's a year today Brooke." He whispered placing her hand on his chest._

"_No…" she shook her head pulling her hand away, "It would have been. We aren't together it's not anymore."_

"_Please don't leave me." he begged like a child grabbing the side of her shirt pulling her towards him, "Please Brooke, please don't leave me." he clung to her, to her shirt resting his head against her stomach._

"_Luke…" her voice cracked as once again her vision blurred with tears wrapping her hands around his head._

"_I don't work without you. I don't know to do anything without you." He cried into her stomach and it even shocked Brooke when she felt her shirt become wet with his tears. She has never in her life seen him cry, she didn't even know if he knew how to cry._

"_Lucas…" her heart broke a little more as he pulled his face from buried in her stomach and started to kiss up her body, over her clothes until reaching her lips and before she could stop him, he kissed her. She knew she should be fighting him of but it's like when her hands pushed against his chest he just grabbed her wrists yanking her body into him._

"_I love you." he mumbled against her lips pulling her down on the bed with him, "I love you so much and I know you love me." he told her but not removing his lips from hers almost scared what would happen if he did._

"_Lucas…" She whimpered as tears slipped out of the corner of her eye onto his bed._

"_Please tell me you love me." He begged running his hand up her side and under her shirt grabbing onto her side, "Please say it."_

"_Don't make me." she cried not wanting to admit it. Not wanting to tell him she still loves him. She shouldn't love him, he cheated on her. He broke her. Yet then it hit her where she was. She was on his bed. The bed not a few days ago he was with someone else in, "No." She pushed him off her and got up fixing her shirt._

"_Pretty Girl." He reached for her hand but when he did she just spun back around slapping him right across the face._

"_Don't…" she choked on her words not believing she just hit him, "Don't call me that." she whispered placing her hand over her mouth as he sat still on his bed looking away from her, "This isn't my fault!" she yelled at him, "I didn't do any of this! I didn't want any of this to happen and I didn't want to see it! God damn it!" she cried wiping her nose with the back of her hand, " Why couldn't you have just passed out or something?" she asked giving a small shrug shaking her head._

"_I don't know." He whispered knowing nothing he said mattered anymore._

"_I loved you Lucas! God damn it I loved you so much and gave everything I had to you! I gave you everything that is me too you!" she screamed shoving him some, "I picked you over my own brother! Someone who has been there for me my whole entire life!"_

"_I know." he nodded reaching for her again yet when he did she once again slapped him making him again look away from her._

"_And look what I got out of it. I gave you everything and you cheated on me! You claim you loved me but you cheated on me! Do you even know how to love someone?!"_

"_Don't!" he yelled back jumping off the bed grabbing onto her wrist so she couldn't hit him again._

"_Let go of me!" she wiggled in his grasp but he didn't listen._

"_Don't you ever tell me I didn't love you! I still love you!" he yelled in her face making her flinch at his tone "I messed up ok! I will tell you I will tell everyone this is my fault! I am losing everything here!" he screamed and she slowly stopped trying to get away from him, "I lost my best friend! He would prefer kicking my ass then talk to me. Matt hasn't talked to me all week and Jason talks to me but the whole time just talks about how I messed up! Then to add to all that, add to the loss of all my friends and possible even the place I live I am loosing you! You don't get what it's like. You have your family, your friends, and your brother. You have everyone! I have no one!"_

"_That's not true." She whispered and he looks at her confused, "You have the bar slut." She hissed coldly at him yanking her hands away, "Don't try to make me feel guilty. Don't try to make me regret ending this. The only thing I really regret is ever giving myself to you." she growled through a tight jaw as she grabbed her purse to leave._

"_You don't mean that." he said as she started out of his room pausing at the door trying to swallow any guilt that might be creeping up before talking to him again._

"_Get yourself together Lucas. I'm only saying this for the people who have to deal with you. Get up, go to class; take a shower." She told him shaking her head at how almost pathetic he looked sitting there, "And for the love of god stop drinking."  
_

_What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you__  
__What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok__  
_

"I am so hoping this guy completely sucks." Lucas mumbled over to Matt who let out a laugh shoving him some as they sat on the bleachers.

"What happened to the whole trying to be her friend, trying to make sure she gets what makes her happy?" Matt asked raising his eyebrow at his best friend who scuffed at him.

"I may want her happy but I am still me." Lucas reminded him and Matt shook his head at his best friend.

"You want her back don't you?" Matt questioned already knowing the answer just wanting his best friend to confirm it. To admit it.

"Yes." Lucas admitted in a low whisper looking down almost as if he was ashamed.

"Luke man." Matt threw his head back.

"I'm not going to do anything about it." He told him quickly, "I can't help if I still love her ok."

"No you can't but you can help what you do about it. She is happy Luke. I mean look at her." He threw his hand out to where Brooke was standing with everyone else going all stupid over her little gift from Adam, "She is happy don't ruin that for her. Don't come here and complicate her life."

"I'm not doing any of that ok!" Lucas snapped annoyed, "I said I wasn't going to act on my feelings. God why don't you believe that? Why doesn't anyone believe that?"

"Because you are still you." He repeated the words Luca just used a few minutes ago, "She is over it Luke. She is over ya'll and I'm sorry if it hurts you-"

"She isn't over it." Lucas interrupted and Matt gave him a confused look.

"Lucas tell me you didn't already try something?"

"No I didn't ok. I didn't but we have moments alright. And I know how lame and dumb that sounds but we do have them and it proves we aren't done. She isn't completely over me. I know Brooke, I know her better than anyone and I know the look she gives me ok."

"Luke you have to let her go." Matt sighed feeling so bad for hurting his friend but knowing he needed to hear it, "Yes ok maybe there is a part of her that will always love you maybe not even love but feel something but it may just be all the things ya'll went through. You are the first guy she ever loved, the first guy she ever slept with and for girls that shit is just always there. They take that as a big deal. You are always going to be there for her Lucas but you can't use that against her."

"I'm not! I wouldn't!"

"Good because I haven't seen Brooke smile this much in a long time and I don't want her hurt again."

"Well then you should give that speech to Adam because I am _never_ going to hurt her again." he told him letting him know and prepared to let anyone else know that is questioning him that he isn't going to do it again. If Brooke gave him the chance, even if it was just as a friendship but if she did he was never going to hurt her. He was never going to ruin things for her, "Matt she was the best thing that has ever happened to me."

"I know she was." Matt nodded since he was pretty much positive he never saw his best friend as happy as he was when Brooke was around. Even before he knew about them he saw something on his face that lite up when she walked into the room. He actually felt stupid he didn't realize it sooner.

_I'm falling to pieces, yeah__  
__I'm falling to pieces, yeah_

_  
"Luke man why are you so fidgety?" Jason questioned noticing since they got to the café he has not stopped moving. Every time the bell above the door went off his head jerked to see who entered. Plus he was smiling like an idiot and texting like crazy on his phone._

"_Fidgety? What? I'm not fidgety." Lucas shook his head at them. Ok so maybe he was looking like an idiot, smiling like an idiot but he couldn't help it. Brooke was going to be here soon and he wanted to see her. He hadn't seen her all weekend and it made him nervous a little. He wasn't sure why but he just didn't want her to feel like he slept with her and wasn't going to be there anymore._

"_Well I mean you're a little fidgety." Matt teased and Lucas rolled his eyes but then like an idiot smiles when the door jingles and in walks the person he had wanted to see._

"_Sorry we are late Cam was once again fighting with Rachel." Brooke rolled her eyes not getting why he brother didn't just admit he was wrong because he was wrong, "Hey guys." She said to each and biting her bottom lip as her eyes wandered over to her boyfriend._

"_Hey Brooke." They all greeted with a wave._

"_Hey." Lucas smiled pulling out the chair next to him everyone missing the smile etched on his face as she slid into the offered chair._

"_Hey Luke." She smiled at him, starring a little too long before turning back to the table of friends._

"_So what were ya 'll fighting about?" Matt asked but looked away from his friend long enough to see a certain brunette at the table giving a smile to a certain friend of his who just gave her a shrug making her roll her eyes. He turned to look back at his best friend who was explaining his fight with his girlfriend but couldn't help but still cut his eyes ever so often at the other two._

_Brooke almost slapped her boyfriend when his hand rubbed up her thigh tracing circles on the inside. However when she cut her eyes over at him he shrugged. He shrugged! Did he not know how serious this was, he brother was right there. Her brother could catch them and the fact his hand would creep up so high under her skirt so she felt his finger graze between her legs making her whole body shudder was not helping. _

"_I need to go to the bathroom." Brooke jumped up making his hand fall and him let out a laugh, "I will be right back." she said glaring at her boyfriend before walking away._

"_So…" Lucas picked up his drink taking a sip, "Now what was it about that fight?"_

_You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain,__  
__You took your suitcase, I took the blame.__  
__Now I'm tryin' make sense of what little remains, oh.__  
__'Coz you left me with no love, with no love to my name.__  
_

"Its just hard that's all." Lucas sighed running his hand through his hair.

"I know it's hard but you have to figure it out. I mean at least do it for Brooke. If you love her still like you say you do just _try_ and let her go." Matt said patting his friend on the back as he got up walking over to his friends.

Lucas sat looking out away from everyone. This was what he chose. How could he be upset with Brooke being happy and just acting like a girlfriend would with her boyfriend when he lost her. It was his fault he lost her and it was his fault she was with Adam but a part wondered if that was how they were. If he and her were so over the love touchy top like her and Adam or if she was just doing it as almost punishment to him.

"Luke…" He heard a familiar voice say almost sounding like it felt bad as he turned to see her sit down next to him.

"Hey…" He offered a smile before turning back to look at the field.

"You ok? I mean with the whole gift thing."

"I'm fine Rach." He lied and knew she knew it was a lie he was far from fine.

"Lucas I know you're not fine and I know it hurt. I mean…" Rachel trailed off not wanting to bring it all up. Of course she gave him a hard time and of course she hated him for hurting her best friend but she also saw his face. She saw how he looked like someone punched him right in the chest. She was almost positive when that ring came out the wind got knocked out of Lucas.

"It doesn't matter. That's over with." Lucas shook his head not wanting to think about it, "I thought you would love this." he gave a dry laugh.

"Well you know." Rachel teased brushing her hair over her shoulder, "You know I hate you for hurting her right?" She question and he just nodded, "But I did know you before I met Brooke. We were friends before and hell we were friends before I met Cam and being so you know I love you."

"Yeah I love you too Rach." He nodded. Rachel and him have known each other for years. They met in high school and then when to the same college where he introduced her to Cam. One spring break Cam and Rachel went with Matt and Jason and someone he just knew as 'Cam's little sister' to California however he had to stay home with his mom. Next thing he knew Rachel came home not just tan but with a brand new best friend. It was about another 2 months before he met a taken Brooke and it was about 7 months before he actually got to date her. He and Rachel had been though a lot since high school and it almost hurt as much losing her friendship as it did Cam's.

"I'm sorry." She apologized placing her hand on his leg, "As much as I want to hate you for hurting her I also know that in the last 3 years I have had an amazing boyfriend but we have had our share of break ups."

"I know all about your break ups." Lucas laughed since the night he finally confessed his feelings to Brooke was one of their break ups. Cam drank so much that night Lucas was pretty much sure he didn't remember any of that night.

"Yeah well in one of our break ups he started seeing someone else. It was just one date and he brought her to eat at a place he knew I always went to and I don't know when I saw them together it killed me. Hell all they were doing was eating and I felt like someone had seriously killed me. And honestly I don't know what I would have felt like if they were doing other things." She told him looking over and literally seeing all the pain in his eyes, "I don't know how I would feel seeing him kissing someone else, hugging someone else telling someone else they love them. I really don't know how I would handle walking in on what you walked in on the other day."

"I deserve it all." He shrugged, "It may hurt like hell and trust me it does. Just the thought of him touching her and…" he trailed off not really wanting to think about what they were doing the other night, not wanting to picture it, "But I deserve it. I _want_ to think this is just how she is. That this is just how they are and she isn't doing it to like hurt me or something."

"Yeah I know." Rachel nodded not really sure if she though Brooke was exaggerating her relationship with Adam or not. Yeah her and Lucas were like this, hell in her opinion she thought they were a little worse but she really wasn't sure what Brooke was doing, "It will get better I promise."

"I'm holding you too it." Lucas finally cracked a smile bumping his shoulder into hers.

"Yeah." Rachel laughed standing up, "I need to pee I'll be back in a few." She climbed off the bleachers, "I will return."

"Alright." Lucas laughed as she walked off.

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing,__  
__Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in,__  
__'Coz I got time while she got freedom,__  
__'Coz when a heart breaks__  
__no it don't break, no it don't__  
__break, no it don't break even no_.

"And it's just the prettiest thing ever!" Brooke once again squealed about her ring as she stood with her boyfriend and all her friends.

"It is the prettiest thing ever." Cam teased mocking his sister's squeal and getting a laugh from everyone but a slap from his sister.

"Shut up I just love it." She pouted looking at it as it sparkled in the sun.

"Well I am glad I did good." Adam smiled wrapping his arms around his girlfriend's waist from behind. He was not only happy he made Brooke happy but he was happy that he was getting along with everyone. They all seemed cool and though Lucas wasn't his favorite person he hated to admit the guy was cool with him. He was just happy that he got to know this part of her life.

"You did very good." She smiled spinning in his arms kissing him then pulling him into a hug. She was happy really happy and it slightly pissed her off when she was hugging her boyfriend she saw Lucas. They locked eyes like they always do when they are around each other she saw the pain across his face. He offered her a small smile that she tried to return but she knew it was forced. It was completely fake, "I'm going to run to the bathroom real quick and be back in just a few." She told them giving her boyfriend a peck as she walked off.

"Brooke." She heard behind her growling when she turned to see the last person she wanted to see.

"Kimber hi." She once again forced a smile. She really hated this girl.

"Hey girl how are you?" she asked pulling Brooke into an awkward hug.

"Great. Today is mine and Adam's anniversary. Look what he got me." Brooke smiled proudly shoving her hand in Kimber's face. Brooke didn't want to be mean, she really didn't but she hated that this girl was all over_ her _boyfriend all the time. It was ridiculous that when Brooke wasn't around, hell even when she was Kimber would do what she could to get Adam's attention and it annoyed her.

"Very pretty." Kimber obvious lied. Not that Brooke didn't think she thought it was pretty more of the fact she was completely jealous and pissed.

"I know."

"Well I am happy for you two. But you know I was thinking we should all go out to dinner. You know the whole group. You and Adam, Clay and Quinn and me, we all haven't hung out in forever." She whined a little and Brooke just looked at her really wondering if she thought of them as _'a group'_.

"Well actually I have some friends in town." Brooke fake frowned really wanting to get away from this girl

"Well bring them too. I would love to meet you other friends." Kimber smiled excitedly and it really made Brooke feel sick. The fakeness of this girl was ridiculous.

"You know I will let you know about that." Brooke nodded and thanked God above when she saw her best friend round the corner, "Rachel, let's go to the bathroom."

"I just ca-"

"You just have to pee oh me too." Brooke cut her eyes over at a dumb smiling Kimber.

"Umm yeah really bad." Rachel lied not really getting it but shrugging it off anyway.

"Ok great." Brooke said grabbing her friend's arm, "Kimber I really have to go but you know I will let you know about that whole hanging out thing. Alright, great, bye." She turned around quickly rolling her eyes when she heard Kimber mumble a '_Bitch_' under her breath.

"There a reason I am once again going into this god awful smelling and dirty bathroom?" Rachel scrunched her nose when they walked into the bathroom.

"Because that girl is annoying as hell and Adam's ex. I can't stand talking to her." Brooke told her as she walked in the cleanest looking stall and shutting the door.

"Oh ex's." Rachel shook her head wanting to laugh that Brooke is all ok with her ex _living_ with her for the summer but not with Adam's being in the same ballpark with him.

"What?" Brooke called not hearing her favorite red head.

"Nothing." Rachel lied as she looked into the mirror fixing her hair.

_What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you__  
__What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok__  
__I'm falling to pieces, yeah_

Lucas sat there a few minutes thinking before getting up himself just so he didn't have to sit there anymore. He figured he could just walk to the car or get something to eat just until all his friends broke away from his ex and Adam and came and sat with him.

"God sorry." He apologized when he was too busy looking down to what was in front of him smashing right into someone.

"Oh it's ok I wasn't watching where I was going." She waved her hand at him as she shook her hand off from where she spilled her drink a little.

"Damn I spilled your drink I'm really sorry." Lucas again apologized grabbing some napkins off the table next to him and drying off her hand, "Let me get you another one." he offered as she looked up at him and smiled. She was really cute. She was no Brooke but it wasn't going to be fair to compare every girl he met to Brooke because he knew for a fact none would ever compare. But everyone told him to move on and he had to start somewhere, "Hi I'm Lucas." he extended his hand as she smiled a little more.

"Kimber."

_Oh, it don't break even, no__  
__Oh, it don't break even, no__  
__Oh, It don't break even, no_

_

* * *

_

**Ok so truth is I know I have dropped some Peyton being the annoying old roommate at one point and I was going to make Kimber Peyton but after I thought about it I couldn't. I'm sorry I really love Peyton, well as long as she isn't going stupid over Lucas, breaking up Brucas and is happy with Jake, so I changed it.**

**I may even have a little Jeyton appearance at some point I don't know yet.**

**Also I was thinking about doing a Love That Shouldn't Happen "Beginning" I'm not sure yet but thinking maybe at some point if enough people would like to see one have just the whole what happened before this story. The relationship going from their friendship to their dating to their break up and everything in between.**

**It would have the flashbacks that are in this story in it so that kind gives you the preview so just let me know in a review or PM all ya'lls thoughts on it!**

**Review please :D**


	8. Cry'

_If anyone asks,__  
__Ill tell them we've both just moved on.__  
__When people all stare,__  
__I'll pretend that I don't hear them talk._

"_Lucas!" Anna squealed throwing her arms around the blonde's neck, "I haven't seen you in what seems like a lifetime. How have you been?"_

"_I have been pretty great." Lucas said over the loud music to the girl he has known for years. They actually use to date back in high school and when she said they haven't seen each other in a lifetime it was no joke. Other than a few texts back and forth over the last few years he hasn't seen her for almost 5 years, "How have you been?"_

"_I have been pretty good. Definitely have missed you." A slightly drunken Anna smirked stepping closer missing the look on the brunette's face that was sitting at the table arms crossed tight over her chest and glaring at her._

"_I've uhh…I've missed you too." Lucas took a step back his legs hitting the table his girlfriend and best friends were sitting at. Yeah he wasn't doing anything wrong but he still felt Brooke's eye burning through his back. He wanted to be able to say something about it but knew he couldn't because his girlfriend wasn't really his girlfriend._

"_We should dance. Come on let's dance for old times' sake." She said grabbing onto his hand._

"_I have to use the bathroom." Brooke stood up pushing herself between the tiny space between the dark headed girl and boyfriend making sure to pass by with a glare._

"_You know Anna I would love to but I can't right now." He said letting his eyes wonder towards where Brooke had moved off to cursing he lost her in the crowd._

"_Aww…" Anna whined running her finger up his chest, "Well come find me when you want to catch up." She winked before walking off._

"_Dude what is wrong with you?" Jason slapped his friend on the back of the head, "That girl was totally hot."_

"_Yeah I know she is my ex girlfriend." He mumbled eyes still looking around the club._

"_No way a girl actually got Lucas Scott to calm down and be her boyfriend?" Matt teased placing his hand to his chest, "I personally am shocked." He said getting a laugh from Cam._

"_Well he did say ex girlfriend." Cam joked yet Lucas just ignored them all, "I think it will take an extremely special chick to get Lucas to actually stay longer than a month."_

"_Yeah it did." Lucas mumbled not catching the confused looks of his friends, "I'm going to get a drink ya'll want anything? No alright be right back." He walked off quickly._

"_Well I mean I didn't say no." Jason mumbled getting a laugh from his friends._

_Lucas searched the dark club for the fiery brunette he loved. She couldn't be mad at him; he didn't do anything wrong so she couldn't be mad. Yet then again this was Brooke, the girl he loved and the girl he has grown to know so well and her being her if she wasn't mad she wouldn't be the girl he fell in love with._

"_Brooke!" He grabbed her arm as she walked out of the bathroom but she jerked away from him as she moved down the dark hall, "God what did I do?" He followed behind her as she ignored him, "God damn it Brooke." He growled grabbing onto her arm and yanking her into the guys' bathroom, "Out!" He ordered the skinny kid at the urinal nervously trying to get his zipper up, "Out!" _

"_Don't yell at him!" Brooke yelled, "He is in the guys bathroom trying to take a piss and you dragged me in here interrupting it so stop yelling!" She screamed slamming her finger into his chest._

"_What is wrong with you?" He asked annoyed, "I didn't even do anything and you are once again pissed at me!"_

"_Excuse me sorry." The kid apologized sliding between them and out the door back into the club._

"_God I can blink wrong and you get pissed." He snapped spinning the lock on the door._

"_Don't yell at me!" She screamed right in his face._

"_I am not yelling!" He screamed back._

"_I don't have to put up with you Lucas! I don't have to stay here if I don't want!" She yelled shoving her hand into his chest pushing him backwards._

"_Don't push me Brooke." He warned but she just pulled back shoving him again, "Brooke stop!"_

"_No Lucas! No I won't stop! I do not have to put up with you! I don't have to and I don't want to anymore! It's not fair to me!"_

"_Then don't! If you clearly hate me so much don't be with me anymore!" He yelled back and as soon as the words came out he wished them back. He didn't mean for them to and the look on her face she wasn't expecting it either._

"_Would it be that easy for you?" Her heart broke as she looked up at him, "You would be able to just end it just like that?"_

"_You said it first Brooke. You said…" He trailed off not really knowing what he was going to say._

"_I didn't mean that. I just meant theses girls. I just meant I didn't want to or have to put up with these girls. I never…I didn't think you would break up with me." Her voice cracked as she took a step back from him walking over placing her hands on the sink closing her eyes, "You want to break up with me." She whispered more to herself as her eyes welled up with tears._

"_No…no…no I don't." He said walking over wrapping his arms around her waist as she let out a shake breath that turned into a small sob, "I don't want to break up. I don't want that."_

"_But you said it." She let out a dry laugh._

"_Cause I thought you were going to say it." He buried his face in her neck holding her close, "I thought you were about to leave me."_

"_I don't want to leave you Lucas." She shook her head, "But…but if you want to just do it now." She choked out moving away from him, "If it's just easier to end it now, if you are looking for a reason I just gave you one."_

"_I'm not." He moved towards her quickly grabbing onto her face giving her a gentle kiss, "God baby I swear I don't want that." he promised leaning his forehead against hers._

"_I just hate those girls." She confessed holding her hands onto his wrist as he held her face, "They are always around and I can't do anything about it. I'm…I'm jealous of them."_

"_What? Why would you ever be jealous of them? Brooke they don't compare to you, they don't even come close."_

"_But they do get to be near you. Touch you and laugh with you. They can do whatever they want with you in public, behind closed doors or anywhere and I can't."_

"_Pretty Girl don't worry about them." He shook his head hating she felt like that, "They mean nothing to me. They will never mean a thing to me because I love you. You know I love you; your it for me Brooke Davis."_

"_You don't know that." Brooke shook her head knowing there was no way he could know that she was it for him, life is so unpredictable._

"_Look at me…" He pulled her face up to look at him giving her a look she has never gotten from him, a look that made her heart race and almost every fear within her erase, "I love you Brooke, and you are it for me."_

_Whenever I see you,  
I'll swallow my pride  
and bite my tongue  
Pretend I'm okay with it all  
Act like there's nothing wrong  
_

"That's really cool." Lucas's voice rang back into her ears pulling her out of her dream world to find him still talking to Kimber. What was he doing? That girl was such a bitch, so stuck up and so fake it was ridiculous. Nothing about her was Lucas's type, nothing about her was what he liked yet here they still sat laughing and joking and talking and it was driving Brooke nuts.

"You ok B?" Cam asked taking a seat next to his little sister as they all hung out at the pool. The game ended about an hour ago and Adam's team won which was cool but now they are all out by the pool and Cam sees the unhappy look on his sister's face about a certain blonde's new friend.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Brooke asked pulling her eyes away from her ex landing them on her big brother.

"Brooke…" Cam tilt his head to the side giving her a look she knows all too well, "It's me. You can lie to everyone, you can lie to Rach and Lucas and even Adam but you cannot lie to me. We share the same blood." He smiled grabbing her knee giving it a squeeze, "So talk to me Sis."

"I'm not jealous." She stated first and though Cam knew that was complete bullshit he let it slide and just nodded for her to continue, "It's just I hate that girl Cam. She tried so many times to take Adam away from me and I don't like her being around him."

"Lucas or Adam?" He asked not really sure which _him_ his sister was talking about.

"Adam Cam, why would I care about Lucas and her?"

"I don't know because the last hour we have gotten to the pool you have been sending daggers in both their backs or the fact the entire game you had no idea what was happening because you were too busy trying to hear them talk." He shrugged making his sister scoff at him, "Brooke seriously don't get mad at me for stating what happened."

"I'm not jealous." She mumbled crossing her arms tight over her chest cringing when she heard Kimber let out an annoying laugh.

"For someone who isn't jealous you sure seem to state it a lot. What's that saying oh yeah 'the lady doth protest too much, methinks?" He smirked making Brooke growl at him.

_I'm talking in circles  
I'm lying, they know it  
Why won't this just all go away_

"Bite me Cam." She hissed not at all agreeing with her brother.

"That's Adam's job or maybe Lucas's I can't keep up anymore." He teased making his sister crack a small annoyed smile, "Oh no I saw it. Don't try to hide it; it's too late the dimples were shown."

"Shut up." She shoved his hand out of her face when he pointed at her smile, "Don't you have a girlfriend to annoy?"

"But you're so much more fun Sissy." He joked but not missing how she still stared straight at his best friend, "Can I tell you something and not get my head bit off?"

"You can try?" She finally turned her head to look at him.

"You're my sister. At the end of the day I am with you on everything and have your back no matter what but it doesn't change the fact that Luke over there is still my best friend. Other than about you we have never fought."

"I know that Cam." Brooke sighed hating them fighting for something that never even worked out.

_Is it over yet?  
Can I open my eyes?  
Is this as hard as it gets?  
Is this what it feels like to really cry?  
Cry  
_

"Yet in the last year he hasn't had a girl around. He hasn't dated, really even fooled around with anyone and Kimber even if you hate it is the first girl since you to make him actually laugh, make him actually not mope over…well you."

"What are you trying to say Cam?"

"I'm saying that unless you are going to be the person to put that smile she is putting on his face again don't mess with it. All he hears is move on, get over her because she has and now he finally is and it's not fair to him for you to mess it up when you know full well you are not going to give him a second chance." Cam said not wanting to hurt his sister but not wanting his friend to get hurt again either. Even if Kimber was just for fun, which Cam was more than positive on was the case least it gave him a distraction from Brooke and Adam.

"You think he deserves a second chance after what he did to me?" Brooke snapped almost annoyed her brother even suggested it.

"Don't bit my head off Brooke." He said making her roll her eyes, "And honestly I think whether you want to admit it or not you still love him. I know it, you know it and hell I'm sure Adam even knows it and I think also that you sometimes want to give him a second chance but are scared to so you hide behind Adam."

"I love Adam Cameron. Don't you say I don't." She hissed at him and he knew she was serious if she used his full name.

"Yeah well I think you love Lucas too." He stood up down with this conversation as he made his way over to his girlfriend.

"You and Rachel belong together." She growled since she already heard that line. She wasn't jealous, she wasn't jealous at all. She had a great boyfriend who she loved and she was just sitting her because he had to go to work for a few hours and that is the only reason she seemed to be in a bad mood. It had nothing to do with Kimber and Lucas what so ever.

_If anyone asks,  
I'll tell them we just grew apart  
Yeah what do I care  
If they believe me or not  
_

"Hey." She heard turning to see Lucas fall down in the longue chair next to her.

"Hi." She barely muttered back as she looked at her friends playing in the pool; mainly just so she didn't have to look at the boy next to her.

"You going to get in?" Lucas nodded his head towards the pool.

"Does it look like I'm getting in the pool?" She asked turning her head to look at him like he was the stupidest person ever.

"I guess not." He mumbled not getting why they seemed to be getting along earlier at the ball game and now she was pissed. Yet it wasn't a shock being as Brooke loved to get pissed at him for the littlest things. He could have shut her car door wrong and she would be pissed saying he slammed it too hard.

"Adam is going to be back soon." She randomly stated making him turn to look at her, "We are going out to dinner tonight and he just had to work a few hours but he will be back."

"I'm sure he will." Lucas mumbled really not wanting to talk about Adam.

"What is that supposed to mean?" She snapped her head to look at him.

"It means I am sure he will." He repeated again as he turned his head to look at her.

"You know Lucas some people keep their promises and Adam is one of them." She glared at him.

"Well Brooke I didn't say he wasn't. I said I'm sure he will be here soon." He said once again not getting what was happening.

"Well it sounded like you were questioning him." She growled crossing her arms tight over her chest.

"Are you trying to pick a fight with me? Because if you are then you're really doing a hell of a good job."

"And why would I be trying to pick a fight with you?" Brooke changed her tone to a sweet innocent one with a smile, "To pick a fight I would have to care and trust me I don't."

"Fine Brooke." He stood up not wanting to listen to her anymore, "Don't care because I don't care anymore. I don't care if you care and I don't care about anything!" He yelled making all her friends turn to look at them, "If your little goal was to hurt me will good job, you accomplished it." He walked off leaving her almost dumb found but his little outburst. Yeah of course she was trying to get a rise out of him but he never yelled at her like that before. Normally he just sat and took it.

_Whenever I feel  
Your memory is breaking my heart  
I'll pretend I'm okay with it all  
Act like there's nothing wrong  
_

"Lucas!" She yelled chasing after him to the parking lot where his car was, "What the hell is your problem?"

"My problem? Seriously you're asking me what my problem is? I wasn't even doing anything to you Brooke! I was trying to be nice and your just take jab after jab at me!" He yelled not getting at all what had just happened in the last ten minutes. Why she just got so pissy.

"I wasn't taking a jab at you! I was just stating what I was thinking about!" She yelled back not thinking anything she did was wrong.

"Well don't! Because god I can't hear you talk about you and Adam! If you want to talk about him talk to Rachel or Cam or Quinn hell anyone but me! I am the last person you should mention him too."

"Why? You said you wanted to be friends' that is what friends talk about." She shrugged crossing her arms over her chest, "I was talking to you like a friend."

"No you were trying to make me jealous! You were trying to play some little game to see how I would react and you got the reaction you wanted."

"What to get yelled at? No Lucas that is not the reaction I wanted."

"Then what did you want?"

"I don't know!" She yelled running her hands over her face, "I don't know ok. I don't know why I said it or why I pushed you I just did ok." She sighed lowering her tone to almost a guilty one. She didn't know why she did it, she doesn't know what happened it just happened and once she started it she somewhat liked the feeling and didn't stop pushing his buttons. Almost wanting to see how far she could push him.

"Brooke I don't want to fight with you. I want to be able to get along even...even if it's just because we have too." Lucas sighed leaning up his car.

"Lucas I don't want to get along just because we have too. I want to get along because I want to be friends again I do I just…you know how I get sometimes." She frowned taking a step closer to him, probably a step to close, "You of all people know how I get."

"Yeah I know." He nodded hesitantly placing his hand on her hip pulling her a little closer.

"I didn't mean to hurt you." She whispered running her finger over his scar across his chest.

"I didn't mean to hurt you either." He whispered back but meaning something completely different.

"It's ok." She shrugged.

"No, not really." He said with a dry laugh and she looked up at him and when she did she wish she didn't. She saw the look in his eyes, it was like the one he had so many times before since she has known him. It was the look he had at the club when he said she meant everything to him, she was his forever and it scared her. She wasn't sure what she felt about that look still being there and honestly with him living under the same roof she wasn't sure how she was going to handle seeing it there either.

_Is it over yet?  
Can I open my eyes?  
Is this as hard as it gets?  
Is this what it feels like to really cry?  
Cry  
Cry_

_

* * *

_

**Review**


	9. Cold'

**I Own Nothing**

**Song is Cold by Jeremy McComb**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

_Somethin in the way your movin  
is tellin me that your still crazy for me _

"It's fine." Brooke lied as she sat on the phone with her boyfriend, "Adam it is I promise. No it's not your fault you can't help they called in sick." She tried to relieve some of the guilt she knew he was feeling, "Adam it's ok. Just finish work and we will go out tomorrow. Ok. I love you too. Bye." She hung up tossing her phone on the bed as she sat there. Well this wasn't how her nigh was supposed to go.

"Hey Brookie." Cam smiled as his little sister walked into the kitchen, "You look nice." He commented on her black tight fitted dress that stopped just above her knee.

"Looks like Brooke here can stop traffic in that dress." Jason whistled as he walked past her, "Gorgeous baby girl." He smiled kissing the top of her head.

"Thanks." Brooke forced a smile that Lucas quickly noticed. You don't know someone as well as he knows Brooke and not notice when she was not ok with something, that something was bothering her.

"Is lover boy picking you up here or you meeting him somewhere?" Rachel asked as she moved around Brooke's kitchen cooking something for everyone to eat.

"Oh umm…" Brooke scratched her head as everyone looked at her, "I'm meeting him somewhere. Umm we are uh meeting at this bar off of Main Street. We met there so it was fitting but I'm off see you all later." Brooke darted out of the room before more questions was asked.

Lucas sat thinking about what was just said. No one seemed to notice, no one made a comment just as Brooke left went on doing what they were doing but they missed that Brooke was just lying. How was it no one noticed but him?

_Somethin bout' the way your lookin  
is tellin me that you're not really over me_

"_Lucas stop yelling!" Brooke snapped into the phone, "You have no right to be mad at me!" She growled annoyed. This was the second talk they have shared since she left Tree Hill. The first one was crying, screaming, begging and arguing about how things were left and this one, well this one she wasn't sure how it was going to end._

"_I'm not mad ok! I'm not and I'm sorry I yelled I just…how could you do that? It's only been a few months Brooke." He frowned bring his voice back down to a calm one. He didn't expect her to get over him so fast, fined someone else so quick but he just happened to walk into his best friend's room to hear Rachel talking to Cam about some new guy Brooke was dating and how she was sure falling in love with. He wished he could get over them so fast, he wished he knew how to end his feelings like that._

"_Lucas it's been a few months that I have been here. We were broken up awhile before I even left." She reminded him. _

"_But…" He trailed off not even sure what he was going to say. She was right, she was always right. "It just hurts."_

"_I didn't do this to hurt you Lucas. I didn't tell Adam yes because I thought it would somehow get back to you and you get hurt. I said yes because for the first time in months there is a guy that I really care for. A guy that for the last few weeks has been an amazing friend to me."_

"_So he is good to you?" He asked knowing he just wanted someone to take care of her, to love her and make everything right. Make her feel what he never could._

"_Lucas he is great to me." She told him honestly._

"_Is he a club guy? Guys you meet at clubs aren't ever good and I'm not saying that because I am jealous or whatever I am saying it because it's true. Don't date a guy from club." He randomly said hearing her laugh for the first time at him, "Don't laugh I am serious. Guys at clubs, especially ones in Miami are just douchy."_

"_Douchy?" Brooke laughed really enjoying where this conversation was going, not the whole boyfriend talk but the fact they were laughing and getting along was nice._

"_Yes douchy. So just don't…don't date one from there."_

"_What about bars? Can they be douchy?" She joked._

"_Not as much as rich asshole douchy guys from clubs. Bars are legit so just pick one from there, or you know better yet pick one from school. They may have their shit together." He said hearing her laugh again making him smile._

"_Well he is from school. We had a class together." She informed him just thinking about Adam making her smile, "That was where we met."_

_Am I holdin not letting go  
The things that never went away  
Am I not holdin on I've got the need to divide you from every living breath_

"You know I think I may go for a walk." Lucas stood up quickly.

"But dinner is going to be ready soon." Matt called to his friend that was moving out of the kitchen.

"I'm not really that hungry." He called back grabbing his wallet and moving out the door. So he would just walk to the bar on Main street and if Adam was there he would head home and if not; well then he would figure out why Brooke left all dressed up with a distant look in her eyes and a face that looked like she just wanted to cry.

He just hoped she really was going to Main Street otherwise he would just be completely screwed.

_I'm cold in the morning thinking about you  
Cold in the evening when I'm without you  
Cold in the morning and I go crazy living life like this  
_

The music was low playing throughout the bar as Brooke ran her pinky over the rim of her glass. She hated coming to bars alone. It made her feel pathetic or something but the thought of sitting at home tonight was something she didn't want to do.

"You look like you could use a friend." She heard as a body slid in the chair next to her, "Which is good because I could use one too."

"I'm actually ok." Brooke forced a smile over at the guy next to her, "But I'm sorry you need a friend but I'm actually waiting for someone." She lied turning back to stare at her drink.

"I'm Jared." He smiled again at her making her annoyed, she just wanted to drink he drink and go, why were people annoying her, "What is yours?"

"Candi." She spun around to face him, "My name is Candi and I have three kids all from different dad's and I might be pregnant right now hence why I am drinking away my troubles. Honestly I am thinking about switching to woman so unless those extremely tight pants are hiding something else then I would suggest you go away."

"You're feisty Candi." He smirked placing his hand on her thigh, "I mean you're full of shit but feisty and I like that."

"Fine." She spun around, "I'm not thinking switching to woman and I don't have any kids but I also have no plan what so ever to sleep with you. So remove your hand from my thigh go into the back room somewhere and use it to make nice with yourself because the thought of you actually touching me makes me want to gag."

"Bitch." He mumbled giving her leg a squeeze a little too tight before standing up, "Don't bother with her she is nothing but a tease." He said looking over Brooke's shoulder and Brooke looked confused before spinning around to see Lucas sliding in the chair next to her.

"Well here Cam and I worried that you couldn't take care of yourself." He laughed as she just stared at him confused.

"Well I always told ya'll I could." She said spinning away from him and taking a sip of her drink, "Ya'll just thought I was super naïve and would get taken by the boogie man."

"Yes and now I apologize for both." He smiled as she nodded picking at the cherry in her drink, "Brooke…" He placed his hand gently on top of hers as she took in a shaky breath, "Pretty Girl what you doing here in a pretty dress and drinking alone?"

"I just…" She breathed out licking her lips and biting her bottom lip, "Adam had to work." She told him, "We were supposed to go out tonight. We were supposed to have a great anniversary dinner, walk on the beach, dance some but he had to work."

"So you came to a bar with creepy douches hitting on you instead of just having dinner with us?"

"It's embarrassing Luke. All I do is tell everyone how great he is, how amazing my boyfriend is and what are they going to think about this amazing boyfriend I brag so much about who can't even take off work for our anniversary?"

"I thought it was already planned? That he only had to work a few hours." He said remembering at the pool she made it clear he was coming over, that he was going to take her out and that her night would be great. She pretty much slapped him across the face with that one.

"He did but he works at this internship thing that's like a big deal and he works with a friend there. It's actually Charlie's dad's company that's how they got it but Charlie is sick and they have this big project they are trying to finish and he is stuck helping."

"Brooke I may not know the guy that well but I can pretty much tell he wouldn't purposely do something that would upset you. I don't think he would work if he could get off." Lucas said knowing that even though he doesn't like Brooke with someone else if he had to see it; if he had to have her with someone else then sadly Adam was a good pick.

"I know it's just I want to spend time with my boyfriend and well he isn't here." She shrugged sad.

"Well…" He looked around the place then back at the girl next to him, "Well I am not going to have you sit here in a bar with guys like your friend from earlier so…" He stood up grabbing some money out of his wallet tossing it on the bar paying for Brooke's drink, "We are going to do something."

"Lucas…" She whined a little as Lucas grabbed her hand.

"Brooke we use to have so much fun. Now I plan on having some fun again and that fun starts right now." He informed her pulling her out of the bar not taking no for an answer.

"Well what if I say no?" Brooke asked as they started walking down the sidewalk Lucas's hand still in hers.

"Well you know better than to say no to me." He grinned over at her, "You know I always get my way."

_Somethin bout' the way your movin me  
is telling me that your still crazy for me  
Somethin bout' the way I'm feeling  
is telling me that I'm not really leavin  
_

"Lucas!" Brooke squealed as Lucas threw her over his shoulder and he spun her around on the beach.

"Say you're having fun! Say you are or I will so throw you in the water." He threatened making her laugh more.

"Ok, ok I am having fun! I promise." She admitted actually being honest. She was having real fun tonight. Lucas took her to eat and get drinks and now they were walking on the beach and she was just enjoying her night. Now of course she wished she was with her certain boyfriend but Lucas was trying hard to make her have a good night and she was thankful for him.

"Ok good." He dropped her, "Because I am getting dizzy." He shook his head trying to making the whole beach stop spinning, "Why did you let me do that?" He teased falling on the beach and on his back.

"Aww you poor baby." She teased standing over his waist looking over him.

"Don't make fun of me." He ordered pointing at her and she laughed that gorgeous laugh he missed hearing grabbing onto his finger helping him up, "Do you want ice cream?" Lucas asked as they started back down the dark beach.

"Luke you don't have to buy me ice cream. I'm ok I promise." She gave him a smile rubbing her hands over her arms as she got some chills.

"Here." He pulled off his jacket draping it over her shoulders.

"Thanks." She smiled wrapping herself in his jacket forgetting the feeling of it and just how good it always smelt.

"But I am not offering ice cream because I don't think you're ok. I am asking you if you want some because I want some ice cream." He shrugged tilting his head to the giving her that smile that still made her weak in the knees.

"Ok." She agreed as they walked up to the vender at the end of the pier.

_I'm holding on not letting go  
the things that never went away  
holdin on I've got the need to provide you with every living breath_

"Two chocolate chocolate chip please." Lucas held up two fingers pulling out his wallet passing over the money and looking over at a smiling Brooke next to him, "What?"

"Nothing I just didn't know you remembered that was my favorite ice cream." Brooke said taking the ice cream cone he handed over.

"Well I do remember things about you Brooke Davis."

"Like what?" She grinned as they started walking down the pier enjoying the peaceful Florida breeze.

"Well let's see…" He tapped his chin as they walked, "People would assume your favorite color is pink or purple being the girlie girl you are but it's actually brown. You like rain but hate thunderstorms and you are cold 99% of the time." He teased making her laugh, "But I know you like ice cream and cheeseburgers and hate those stick skinny girls who eat nothing."

"I know it's so annoying! There is nothing wrong with having a shape!" Brooke growled making Lucas laugh.

"Yeah I know." He agreed as they walked back on the beach taking a seat in the sand, "I know you hate people seeing your vulnerable side and that you will do anything in your power to make sure people don't see that side of you." He said turning to look at her loving the how her hair blew in the wind, "Yet you don't know that, that is the only way I see you."

"I wish that wasn't true." She pulled her knees to her chest resting her arms on them as she licked her ice cream cone.

"It is." He admitted watching her take in a deep breath as he brushed her hair behind her ear, "I know you Brooke. I may know you better than anyone here."

"I know." She swallowed hard, "I wish it wasn't true but I know it is."

"Yeah." Lucas nodded finishing off his ice cream and a silence fell over them as they sat thinking and Brooke finished hers.

_I'm cold in the morning thinking about you  
Cold in the evening when I'm without you  
Cold in the morning and I go crazy living life like this  
cold in the morning thinking about you  
Cold in the evening when I'm without you  
Cold in the morning and I go crazy living life like this_

"_This should be weird." Brooke commented as she walked into her brother's apartment, "Lucas you kissed me last night in a state of drunkenness and I am not sure what I am supposed to do about it."_

"_Brooke…" Lucas sat up on his couch seeing the brunette move into his living room._

"_No Lucas I'm serious! We should feel uncomfortable around each other; we shouldn't just be out at lunch with friends and my brother like its all fine. I mean we made out last night! Doesn't that seem weird to you?"_

"_No." Lucas told her honestly and watched the shock look spread across her face as her purse dropped to her side._

"_Lucas! What we did last night was not ok!" She yelled at him and grew annoyed that he was not agreeing._

"_What did we do?" He teased resting his hand behind his head as he relaxed on the couch._

"_Lucas!" She growled trying to ignore his shirtless body as he laid out on the couch._

"_Brooke you said I was drunk so please remind me what happened." He joked, kind of enjoying the frustration that spread across her whole face._

"_Lucas Scott I am not playing with you right now!" She snapped moving to the edge of the couch looking down at him._

"_I'm not playing either Brooke." He shrugged, "I totally don't recall what on earth you are talking about. I am thinking I need you to refresh my memory." He smirked grabbing onto her wrist before she could object and pulling her over the couch on top of him; his lips smashing into hers. She fought it at first but within seconds she was kissing him back and he was begging for entrance that she quickly accepted._

"_Lucas!" She growled shoving away from him and falling off the couch making him laugh, "Stop doing that!" She groaned sitting up on the floor._

"_Brooke I didn't do anything. You kissed me back; I didn't force you to kiss me either time. Didn't force it now and didn't force it last night at the club."_

"_You weren't in your right mind. You were drunk." She reminded him once again making him roll his eyes as he flipped on over on his side._

"_Yeah well you weren't."_

"_Lucas you need to stop." She said in a calmer tone shaking her head at him._

"_I don't want to stop Brooke. I kissed you last night because I told you I wanted to; I had been wanting to and I kissed you right now because…because I like you Brooke." He admitted and saw the shocked look again cross her face, "I like you a lot."_

_You say you don't know, you say you don't know me  
since I lost my soul  
ohhh take a look inside, you can't deny  
ohhh take a look inside there's more than just a ghost to find in me  
_

"Luke…" Brooke whispered through the night turning her head to look at him, "I'm sorry." She apologized resting her chin on her arms.

"For what?" Lucas asked confused not getting why she would be sorry. She never did anything wrong when they dated or even now; everything was his fault.

"For the way I left you." She shrugged tucking her hair back, "I shouldn't have come by that night and I shouldn't have left without goodbye; it wasn't fair to you."

"Brooke…" Lucas shook his head turning to look at her, "I don't regret you coming by that night. Do I wish you were there when I woke up? Of course I did but I also wished everything was just a bad dream and you weren't leaving. Everything was my fault ok? Nothing was yours and I got it. You needed closure, we both needed closure."

"Did you get it? Did that night give it to you?" She asked because she knew it sure as hell didn't give it to her.

"No." He told her honestly and she nodded looking out at the ocean swallowing the lump in her throat.

"When I first moved here…" She swallowed blinking away her tears, "Every night without fail I would have this dream and every morning I would wake up and feel the pain in my chest that it wasn't real."

"What was the dream?" He asked cursing the tears he saw in her eyes; he didn't want to upset her. All these years he had made her cry and he didn't want to give her something else too; not tonight, not after already being upset about Adam.

"That you were here." She admitted her voice cracking as she turned to look at him.

"Brooke…" He frowned stopping the urge to pull her into him.

"Every night I would make myself think of something; anything just so I didn't have that dream but I always did. It was always the same. I would come home from class one day and you would be inside my place sitting there waiting for me. You would tell me you missed me, you loved me, that you still wanted me and that your insides were ripping apart without me around you."

"They were Brooke. Just because I wasn't there don't think I didn't die inside because I did. God I swear I did. If I knew you wanted me here I would have been here in a second. I would have done anything to get here to you; I just didn't know you wanted me too." He cursed the feeling inside telling him once again it was his fault. He should have been here; he should have come because he thought about it so many times but was scared of hurting her again; of breaking her heart. If he knew she wanted him here he would have come, and he was more than sure if he did come she would have been his again.

"I thought moving would fix things." She looked back at the ocean watching the waves crash, "I thought if I didn't see you every day, hear your voice, pass somewhere that we had been then I would be ok. I would have a fresh start, be who I wanted to be, have no one know what happened and it all be better. Yet it's true what they say; you can move wherever you want but you take your heart with you and those dreams were just a reminder of that."

"I wish we could go back Brooke. I wish everyday that I could go back and do things different because I would. I would have never been so stupid and jealous and insecure with us. I would have believed in your love and your trust and believed there was no way you were with him somewhere. God I never would have drank so much."

"We can't change the past though." She shrugged standing up and wiping off the sand, "One day you wake up Lucas. You realize wishing and wanting doesn't get you what you want and that no amount of tears fixes things. You just have to accept it live each day and know the day comes when those dreams stop."

"Did they?" He asked as he stood up in front of her seeing her breath become quicker and heart race as he took a step closer only inches from her face, "Did you stop dreaming that dream?"

"Yes." She admitted; hating her skin burning when his thumb grazed over her bottom lip.

"When?" He pushed wanting to know and shouldn't have been at all surprised when she whispered back, "When I met Adam."

_I'm cold in the mornin thinking about you  
Cold in the evenin when I'm without you  
Cold in the mornin and I go crazy living life like this_

_

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_

**Review :D**


	10. Just A Dream'

_I was thinking about her__  
__Thinking bout me__  
__Thinkin bout us (us)__  
__What we gunna be?_

"_You look amazing," she spun around to see her boyfriend leaning against the door frame. "Hey Pretty Girl," he smiled at her._

"_Hey," she flashed a dimple smile, before looking back in the full length mirror. "You sure I should wear this?" she looked back over her outfit choice. "I feel like it's to revealing or I don't know," she did a twirl to see the back of her short black dress. "I just don't look good in it," she dropped her shoulders with a frown. _

_Normally Brooke felt pretty confident in herself, her clothes and looks but not now. She knows she is going out with her boyfriend and friends but she also knows there is going to be a certain ex at the club of her boyfriend. She of course knows Lucas wasn't serious about the girl, dated all but a week like years ago but still, she didn't want to look beneath her or anything._

"_Are you serious?" Lucas felt like she had to be lying but she just kept looking in the mirror. "Ok baby," he walked towards her and took her hand. "You look absolutely gorgeous, so gorgeous I might get into a fight for some asshole staring to long," he joked loving when she smiled._

"_Now I don't want that," she laughed a little, playing with the button on his shirt. "I just want to look perfect for you," she admitted. "Someone you are like yes that is my girlfriend."_

"_Brooke," he frowned, sitting down on her bed, pulling her to stand in front of him. "I never want you to ever think I am not going to be proud to say you are my girlfriend. You are beyond perfect," he played with a strand of her hair. _

"_Thank you," she leaned her head down to give him a kiss. "Lucas!" she giggled when he grabbed onto the back of her head and pulling her on the bed, keeping his lips locked to hers. "Baby we are leaving in a few minutes," she reminded him as his hand started to slide her black dress up on the side._

"_Yeah so?" he smirked against her lips and moved his mouth to her neck. "They can wait."_

"_Don't think they will," she gasped out as he clamped down on the soft skin, making her body thrust into his. "Luke," she closed her eyes as his warm tongue flicked over the spot he just bit._

"_I'll drive," he said rocking his hips into hers. "We will meet them there," he moved to kiss her back on the lips._

"_Ok," she caved, her hands doing quick work on his shirt and getting it off. "Sounds like a plan to me."_

_Open my eyes, (Yeah)__  
__it was only just a dream..._

"Stop it Brooke," the brunette shook her head of her thinking, throwing the black dress she was about to put on back on the bed. "I can't wear that," she said grabbing a skirt and top.

"Brooke you- whoa," the voice behind her spun back out of the room. "Sorry Brookie."

"It's ok Cam," she pulled her shirt on and then skirt. "All covered you can enter," she called, looking at herself in the mirror.

"You know you should really lock that thing," Cam came back into the room, plopping down on the bed. "I don't want to ever see what I just saw again."

"Well dumbass you should have knocked," she informed him, "Plus I live with girls and if it's not one of them it's my boyfriend," she shrugged sitting on the chair and pulling on her heels. "Not locking the door is a habit."

"Yeah still gross," Cam made a disgusted look of his sister just walking around not clothed. "Gross, the image is in my head," he cringed, scrunching up his face.

"Oh shut up," she threw a pillow at him. "What you wanting anyway?" she walked over to her dresser to put her earrings in.

"I was wondering why that boyfriend of yours isn't here tonight," Cam shrugged. Not that he cared one way or the other he just didn't want his sister not to have her boyfriend around when Lucas was hanging out with Kimber, he didn't want her getting her feelings hurt by him…again.

"Oh he has night classes, but morning practices," she explained. "He normally gets out of his finally class around nine, nine thirty and then heads home does homework and bed for his early classes in the morning and practice. We usually hang out during the day," she told him, putting on some lip gloss.

"He is a lot different than the guys you normally date. He is like…responsible," Cam said the word like it was foreign to him and Brooke laughed.

"Yeah it's really refreshing," she admitted spinning the plastic stick so it closed. "How is Lucas doing with school?" she carefully asked.

"He is doing alright," Cam told her as he flipped through a book that was on her nightstand. "He was lost a little on a few classes for a little awhile but he fixed himself. He has actually has only two classes before he graduates," he said really proud of his friend. Though Lucas went through that spell of not going to class, and just staying locked away in his room he realized he had to get his life together and he did.

"That's great," she gave a genuine smile. "I'm proud of him," she dropped the lip gloss in her purse.

"You know," Cam sat up on her bed, tossing the book back on the desk. "He wants you to come to his graduation."

"He does?" Brooke looked up at him.

"Yeah," he nodded. "I mean he hasn't actually said it out loud but all he says is this was the first thing he ever really accomplished on his own and says he did it for you."

"Me?" Brooke raised her brow not getting why he did that for her.

"He thought that if he finished school, got a real job and turned himself around you would come back," he confessed seeing the look that spread across his sister's face and not sure how he felt about it, that wasn't a look that read what she had been speaking. "He thought if he changed and you saw it you would believe he was changed," he stood up from the bed, watching as his sister stared off into space. "You look pretty Brookie," he kissed the side of her head before leaving her alone thinking.

_So I travel back (uh)__  
__down that road (road)__  
__Will she come back? (Uh)__  
__No one knows__  
_

"_Lucas are you seriously mad at me?" Brooke placed her hands on her hips completely in disbelieve. She hadn't done a damn thing but of course he picks a fight, he always picks a fight._

"_Nope," he shook his head taking another sip of his beer. "I'm in a good mood," he gave a fake smile that made her growl._

"_Lucas," she snatched the beer from his hand. "Just stop drinking damn it," she ordered so over him and his alcohol. He had a problem, she knew it, he knew it, everyone knew it but still he drank and drank and drank and soon it was going to get him into trouble._

"_Why?" he snapped already on the search for the best way to get to the bar and avoid the crowd. "So I can watch you and him sober? Yeah don't think I want that," he moved to storm passed her but Brooke grabbed his arm to stop him. "What!" he spun on his feet to look at her, the smell of alcohol on his breath making her cringe. _

"_I love you," she gave him a hurt expression. "I just…" she sighed dropping his arm. "I just love you Lucas but I love the sober you," she pulled in a long breath "But I don't think he is here anymore," she frowned, handing back over his beer and moving passed him getting lost quickly in the crowd; leaving him looking at the drink in his hand and back over at her._

"_Damn it."_

_I realize (Yeah)__  
__It was only just a dream_

"Goodness," Rachel dropped back down in the booth that held her friend. "I love your brother I do but I can't handle all that dancing," she laughed pushing some red hair out of her face.

"Yeah," Brooke looked down at her drink before slowly taking a sip.

"Hey," Rachel slid over in the booth closer to her friend. "What's going on?" she questioned over the loud music.

"Nothing," she shook her head, pushing a fake smile. "Everything is fine," she gave a nod, tossing a glance back into the crowd, just in time to see Kimber place her hand on Lucas's thigh and throw her head back laughing at something he was saying.

"Oh," the red head caught on. She knew that one was going to get brought up sooner or later. Though she had no problem with Kimber she could tell Brooke hated her, it was hard to miss with her comments and glares she threw at the girl. Yeah her laugh was a little annoying and she talked a lot, I think Brooke's biggest problem with the girl is the fact she had caught the attention of a certain blonde brooder. "Jealous huh?"

"I'm not jealous!" Brooke objected quick, getting a questionable look from her best friend. "I'm not ok? It has nothing to do with Kimber and her nasty sluty self."

"Then what does it have to do with?" Rachel popped a cherry in her mouth from her drink. "Because you have been sending daggers into the girl the whole night."

"She just reminds me of _her_," Brooke growled crossing her arms over her chest. "But a little longer hair on the small twit and you got the slut."

"How do you know?" Rachel raised her brow confused how Brooke would ever know what she looked like.

"Because I saw the slut," Brooke snapped over at her, not knowing why the pain took over her body again. "I saw her with him and god…" she cringed at thinking it again.

"I didn't know that," Rachel leaned back in the booth not sure why she didn't know that Brooke had actually seen the girl.

"Yeah, well I did," Brooke scoffed. "And she looks just like her."

"You know," Rachel leaned in close. "If you don't want her around you know all you have to do is tell him you don't like her."

"No I can't," Brooke shook her head. "It's not my place to tell him that," hurt spread all over her as Lucas stood up, helping Kimber through the crowd of people and back to the table, hand in hers.

"Brookie," Rachel frowned, knowing it hurt Brooke a whole lot more then she would ever admit. She loved him, she didn't care if Brooke gave the line of course he will always be part of her and I love Adam, Brooke was still clearly and completely head over heels for the blonde heading their way.

"Its whatever," Brooke waved her hand at it. "We ended, we are finished and I'm happy now," she forced a smile and swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat. "I'm fine."

"If you say so," Rachel still didn't believe it but chose to let it go, well for now.

___I was at the top and now it's like I'm in the basement__  
__Number 1 spot, Now she find her a replacement__  
__I swear now I can't take it__  
__Knowing somebody's got my baby_  


"_I'm sorry," two arms circled around her waist as Brooke stood there. "I'm sorry," he repeated holding her close and kissing the side of her neck._

"_I know you are," she frowned, running her hand slowly over his. "You have to know you are all that matters to me Lucas," she traced over the small scar across his hand. "I would have given up everything for you."_

"_I know," he held her tighter. "I know Pretty Girl."_

"_Then trust me," she spun in his arms to look at him. "Understand that he means nothing to me, he is just a friend and you are everything I ever wanted."_

"_I do trust you Brooke," he brushed her hair over her shoulder. "I just know you can do better, you deserve better and I'm scared the day you realized that is quickly approaching," he confessed, leaning his forehead against hers. "I can't lose you."_

"_Lucas," she shook her head, taking his hands in hers. "I'm right here ok? I'm right here with you," she held his hands to her chest. "I just need you to be here with me."_

"_I'm here Brooke," he gave her a gentle kiss that made her heart flutter. "You have to know I would never do anything to mess that up, mess us up. I'll stop, I promise," he looked into her eyes, seeing all the doubt that was formed there. She didn't believe him, he knew she didn't. Yet the truth was he knew it was an open ended promise. He knew the next time it was offered, he got mad or bored he would drink something and sadly he knew she knew that too._

"_Ok," she finally spoke looking back down at the ground. "I believe you," she wished she did, she wished she trusted him but knew it wouldn't happen._

"_I love you Brooke," he tilted her chin to look at him. "I may be a piece of shit in everything that is life but you have to know that loving you has been the only thing I have done right in a real long time," she saw the honesty in his words, that one she did believe. _

"_You're perfect Lucas," she leaned up on her toes to give him a kiss. "You can do anything you want, I know it," she pulled back smiling at him and when she looked at him like that, smiled at him and showed so much love in her eyes, for a moment, even if brief he really believed he could do anything; be anything._

_I'm going through it every time that I'm alone__  
__Now I'm wishing she would pick up the phone__  
__But she made a decision that she wanted to move on__  
__Cause I was wrong._

"Are you like alive in there?" Jason's hand waved in front of his friends face.

"What?" Lucas came out of his thoughts to see a table of people staring at him. "Yeah sorry," he pushed his friend's hand out of his face.

"What are you thinking about?" Kimber leaned close, placing her hand on his leg and making him jump a little.

"Nothing," he lied looking up at the brunette who was looking at him. "I wasn't thinking about anything," he gave a smile, thankful when the waitress walked up to their booth.

"Hey ya'll want a drink?" She asked handing Brooke and Rachel a refill on what they had before.

"Oh yes, I would like a Sex on the Beach please," Kimber smiled and Brooke scoffed, of course she would drink that. A girlie pansy drink that Brooke would never dare order, she definitely wouldn't order it with the boys because growing up they put her in what they called '_training_' and would teach her how to drink. Soon she could drink better than most of them and a Sex on The Beach would not be one they taught her to drink.

"Ok," the waitress wrote it down and turned to Lucas. "What about you doll?"

"Just a coke is fine," he told her and she nodded before walking off.

"A coke?" Kimber raised her brow at him as he sat there. "You don't seem like the type to come to a bar and just drink a coke," she said shocked. She definitely hadn't taken Lucas as the non drinking type.

"Yeah I don't really drink anymore," he shrugged feeling a certain pair of hazel eyes on him. "I haven't actually had a drink in about a year," he confessed looking up to see the shocked look on the holder of those eyes.

"Why?" Kimber asked.

"Because someone told me they didn't like the person I was when I drank," he kept his eyes locked on Brooke's. "And I really didn't like the feeling I got too much by that," he held Brooke's gaze a little longer before she looked down. "So I stopped," he looked back over at Kimber.

"Oh," Kimber sat there a second as she thought about it, not at all missing the gaze between the two at the table. "Well I'm sure I would have liked you either way," she gave a flirty smile sliding closer to him.

"Yeah," Lucas let out an awkward cough, not missing the irritated noise Brooke made with her comment. "But I need to go to the bathroom," he slide away from the blonde next to him. "I'll be right back," he gave the group a look over before walking away.

Brooke wasn't stupid, she knew what he wanted. He gave her the sign, the look they had when they dated. Before anyone knew when they went out and he wanted to talk to her he would excuse himself to the bathroom, make a phone call or something and stand up, scan the group and then land on her and scratch his eyebrow before walking off. Now of course right now he might have just done it as a habit but the glance he tossed over his shoulder as he disappeared through the crowd told her differently.

___Now you ain't around, baby I can't think__  
__I shoulda put it down, shoulda got that ring__  
__Cuz I can still feel it in the air__  
__See her pretty face, run my fingers through her hair_  


Lucas leaned up against the wall listening to the song play through his head and watching the people in the crowd room dance up against each other. He wondered how many people knew each other, how many had just met that night and how many people in the room knew the feeling of dancing with someone like that who you actually cared about. How if the chemistry between two people is strong enough then just dancing with them can be so sexual, can send you to the point where you have to control yourself from not taking them right there on the dance floor.

"Hey," the familiar raspy voice rings into his ears as he stands there.

"Hey," he smiled turning to look at her. They hadn't talked much, not since their night out and not since she admitted what she did to him and that was hard on Lucas. Living in the same place as the girl you are crazy about and going a few days without having an actual conversation was too much for him.

"You ok?" she asked, worried something was wrong with him.

"Dance with me," he said the music making him smile and frown all at the same time.

"Luke…" she sighed not thinking that was his reasoning for asking her to follow and if she did know not have come at all.

"Don't Brooke," he shook his head to stop her. "Don't say no," he took a step closer, "Just come dance with him," he offered his hand and watched the battle she had in her head.

"O-ok," she caved slipping her small hand into his larger on. Don't ask her why she agreed, don't ask why she said ok but she did and when he started to pull her through the crowd to the center of the dance floor a way to familiar feeling took over.

Spinning with her back against his chest Brooke moved to the music. Her head tilted to the side as his mouth lingered close to a certain spot he knew drove her crazy. Her heart raced with his hand placed on her hips holding her close and her body trembled when one of his hands met hot skin as her shirt raised a little on the side.

"I want to tell you something," he whispered in her ear as they moved, Brooke craning her head back in hopes of possible feeling his lips graze over her skin.

"Ok," she swallowed hard, sliding her hand up through his hair, as they kept moving.

"I don't want you to say anything though," he said trying to ignore the feeling over her body close against his and her hand playing with his hair.

"Ok," she felt her heart slam into her chest about what he was about to say.

"I'm sorry," he spoke over the loud music right into her ear and her felt her mouth go completely dry when his lip accident grazed over her ear. "I know I have said it before but in a way I don't think I meant it. I understand what I did to you now Brooke, I understand what I made you feel and I need you to know how sorry I am. Never in my life would I hurt you like I did and I need you to know I'm sorry."

"I know," she nodded, tilting her head back to look at him, her heart stopping completely for a second at him being only an inch from her lips. "I know you are," she repeated, keeping her eyes locked on his.

"Brooke…" he spun her body around to look at him. "I can't can I?" he tossed a glance down at her lips and she felt her body freeze. "Stop me Brooke," he begged, his eyes looking in hers for what he should do.

"Stop," her eyes dropped to the floor, her body getting a chill by him pushing the kiss to her forehead. "I'm sorry," she apologized. "I shouldn't have...I-"

"My fault," he shook his head, not wanting her to blame herself for it. Yet he couldn't ignore the part in his chest that let him know she would have let him if he didn't tell her not to let him. "I don't know why I did that."

"Kimber likes you," she stated keeping her eyes locked on his shirt. "She _really_ likes you," she let out a dry laugh thinking about it, it actually made her feel a little sick inside.

"Brooke…" he frowned sliding his arms around her and pulling her close to him.

"Do you like her?" she questioned, his shirt opening up a little on at the top and her running her thumb back and forth over the scar. "Am I allowed to ask that?" she questioned never really trying the whole friends thing with an ex before, well not an ex that she was as crazy about as Lucas.

"No," he admitted, his thumb stroking her soft skin, making her shiver.

"To which question?" she let out a dry laugh finally lifting her gaze to look at him.

"No you aren't allowed to ask that," he said watching her gaze drop back down to his scar. "But you know we don't really go by the rules of things and you always ask what you're not supposed to."

"Yeah," she nodded, the song they were listening to slowly coming to an end.

"A little ironic huh?" he said, her looking at him confused. "The song," he pointed up as the song places throughout the room.

_And I just hope that she notice she the only one I yearn for__  
__No more will I be missing, will I learn?__  
__Didn't give her all my love__  
__I guess now I got my payback_

_If you ever loved somebody put your hands up__  
__Now they're gone and you wish you could give them everything_

"Funny how that works sometimes," he let out dry laugh. "Guess songs are really good at being a soundtrack to your life huh?" he dropped his hands from her side and brushed a kiss against her forehead. "I get it now," he murmured against her skin. "It hurts and it took awhile but I get it."

"Lucas," she didn't think his name even came out of her mouth as he spun on his feet away from her, leaving her alone on the dance floor, feeling cold without his touch.

_I was thinking about her__  
__Thinking bout me__  
__Thinkin bout us (us)__  
__What we gunna be?__  
__Open my eyes, (Yeah)__  
__it was only just a dream..._

_

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**Review**


	11. Is It Really Over Now?

_I drove by your house today guess it's a little out of my way_

_I saw you and him laughing and carrying on what could i do but just drive on_

_I couldn't help but stare right in my rear view_

_We used to be that way girl me and you_

"Brooke!" Rachel stormed into her best friend's room.

"What?" Brooke looked at her confused as she put away her clothes.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" she slammed the bedroom door, making the brunette jump.

"Well other then my best friend acting like a crazy bitch nothing," she spun around placing her hands on her hips. "What the hell is bothering you?"

"I don't know Brooke maybe it's because I'm hungry or tired or annoyed I'm not on the beach with my boyfriend or maybe, just maybe it's because my _best friend_ who I take the side of over everyone kissed her ex last night!" she snapped, watching Brooke's eyes widen.

"Rachel wait I-"

"Do you know how many times I have took your side? How many times when Lucas would be whiney I would tell him to get over it, he messed up and needed to move on? God do you know how many times I have told him that since we have been here? Tons!" she threw her hands up still not able to process yesterday. "Hell how was I supposed to know you were off giving him false hope!"

"I'm not doing that!" She yelled. "God we didn't….we didn't kiss ok?" she told her, bringing back to a calmer tone.

"You sure because it looked pretty damn close to a kiss," Rachel crossed her arms and leaning back.

"Of course I'm sure! I was there wasn't I?" Brooke questioned, hating that moment ever happened.

"Yeah so was I and from where I was sitting it was a full on Brooke and Lucas moment that would make someone blush," she argued, Brooke shaking her head no. "Yes it was Brooke! You think I missed where his mouth was located or the look you gave him? The look everyone knows what means when you give it to him or how your body was all against his and his hands were running places that only one person should run, a person who isn't Lucas Scott anymore!"

"I know that ok!" Brooke yelled dropping down on her bed, letting out an exhausted sigh. "It…it was just caught up in a moment, a moment that was confusing and scary and I didn't mean to ok?"

"Not meaning to isn't a good excuse Brooke," Rachel dropped down beside her. "You love him."

"No, no I don't, I don't love him I-"

"Love him?" Rachel questioned and Brooke let out a shaky breath.

"I…" she spoke and just chose to shut her mouth, not say anything else.

"Brooke just…just say what you are feeling?"

"I don't know ok?" she stood up, running her hand through her hair. "I love Adam I know without a doubt I love him."

"And Lucas?"

"He is Lucas," her voice cracks and eyes tear up. "No matter what he is always there," she grumbled tightening her fist. "If he isn't physically there he is in my damn mind. Whether it's a damn song I hear or a joke, a comment or god something and he crosses my mind and I don't know how to turn it off!"

"Brooke you can't," she sighed, resting on the bed. "You can't just turn it all off. If it's there it's there and if you care you care."

"God it would be so much easier if I just hated him," she dropped back on the bed, running her hands over her face. "God why can't I just hate him? My life would be so less complicated."

"I've heard that one before," Rachel let out a dry laugh leaning back on the bed.

_Is it really over now?_

_Tell me is this the way it all works out?__  
__Is this the day I never dreamed would ever come?__  
__Tell me is this the final straw? Did our love really matter at all?__  
__I guess I should find a way to get over you some how.__  
__Is it really over now?__  
_

"_Brooke you ok?" Rachel walked into her friend's room, finding her moving around way too much._

"_Fine," Brooke held back the crack in her voice as she put all of Lucas's stuff in a box, needing to get rid of it. _

"_I don't think I believe you. You aren't as Cheery as normal," she explained dropping on the bed._

"_Please…" a small crack. "Please don't call me that," it broke out as her throat grew tight. _

"_Brooke…" Rachel jumped off the bed moving over to her friend on the verge of a break down._

"_I can't cry," she shook it off walking over and rewinding her iPod and the verse she has listened to about a million times. "If I cry I won't stop and I can't."_

"_And listening to this over and over is helping?" she pointed to the song as Brooke sniffled, going through her CD's. _

"_Yes," she nodded dropping a CD in the box and moving towards her closet._

"_Brooke…" Rachel shook her head going to turn off the song. _

"_No!" Brooke slapped her hand to stop her. "I like this part," she turned it up._

_That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles__  
__And my daddy said stay away from Juliet__  
__And I was crying on the staircase__  
__Begging you please don't go_

"_Brooke you rocking out to a country teenbot isn't healthy, nor is how this song has a relation to anything," she said a little confused._

"_Her music makes sense," Brooke argued dropping a picture in the box. "I mean yes I agree I use not to agree but when your heart is broken its perfect and this song…it's perfect."_

"_Why because you were born in a time where outfits were dreadful?" she raised a brow and Brooke groaned._

"_No Rachel!" she threw a book in the box. "Because I love him and don't want him to leave me and because your boyfriend is an over protective dick who won't let him near me!"_

"_Oh gotcha," she nodded that making a little more sense. "You talk to him?" she asked and Brooke shook her head no._

"_It makes it harder," she frowned looking at a photo of them, stroking her thumb over his smiling face. "I know he loves me," she spun around to her friend. "Cam may not but I do," a tear slipped out of her eyes. "And I don't care if you don't believe it or he doesn't but he does. I saw a Lucas none of ya'll saw and I fell in love with that Lucas."_

"_Then why not tell Cam to shove it?" Rachel asked confused. "If you are so sure why not be with him? I mean I love Cam with everything in me but you can't have him tell you who not to be with. If you think Lucas has changed and believe he loves you then go for it."_

"_Cam is making it so hard Rach," Brooke swallowed the hate she had for her brother and the way he has been acting since he found out about her and Lucas. Though she didn't think he would be kind she never thought he would be like this. "God why do I love him? Things would just be so much easier if I didn't love him."_

"And like that time I don't know Brooke," Rachel rubbed her back feeling guilty she didn't have a better answer.

"I just need him to not be around me so much," she stood up, fixing her shirt. "Adam has been crazy with school and ball that he hasn't been around but I need to make myself be around him. I don't need to spend every second with Lucas; I need to be around Adam more."

"Brooke I don't think-"

"It will work," she moved to her dresser, grabbing her light jacket. "Its not even like I love him like that anymore and when he wasn't here I was fine," she lied a little. "So I just need to be away from him."

"Brooke no, honey look…"

"No!" Brooke threw her hand up to stop her. "It will work….I promise I just…I need Adam."

_Guess I should throw them all away,_

_Every memory that you and I ever made__  
__Like that summer down in Mexico I can't believe how far we let ourselves__go._

_We made love that night on a bed of sand_

_We watched the sun come up baby hand in hand_

"Cam!" the dark headed boy's head lifted to catch a flying ball. "Talking here," he caught it to throw it back. "She did that?"

"Yes and I don't…" he got cut off when the ball flies back towards them. "Jay!" he grabbed the ball annoyed. "You can keep up the game in like a minute but for now chase a bird or something," he slammed the ball back, Jason catching it and laughing as he goes over to talk to Quinn and Clay. "And I don't know what to do."

"Well she did stop you," Matt said as he stood there.

"Yes because I told her too," Lucas repeated for about the millionth time. He didn't care what anyone said if he didn't say '_Stop me Brooke'_ she would have kissed him. "And the look guys…I saw the look."

"That look could be a million things," Matt tried to say, hoping his friend didn't get his hopes up.

"No it doesn't!" Lucas sounded annoyed. "God Brooke…Brooke doesn't have that look for a million things, it said she cares, it...it meant something."

"Luke…" Cam sighed; annoyed with the game his sister was playing. "I don't want you to get your hopes up over a look that _might_ or _might not_ have meant something."

"It does Cam," Lucas growled that no one would believe him. He knew there was something and he knew that she could deny it all she wanted but she wasn't over things. "I just don't know what I'm supposed to do about it."

"Nothing," Matt spoke what he was sure his friend was thinking. "Luke she might care, she might still love you but it doesn't change the fact that Adam is still here, she has moved on," he told him, not ever wanting to hurt his friend's feelings but it being true.

"You say this like I don't know it already," Lucas sent over a glare that made both the guys get an uncomfortable chill. "I know _he_ is around but it doesn't change that it's true, she loves me still and she can really only fight those feelings for so long," he walked away feeling like he was the only one who believed in them anymore.

_Is it really over now?_

_Tell me is this the way it all works out?__  
__Is this the day I never dreamed would ever come?__  
__Tell me is this the final straw? Did our love really matter at all?__  
__I guess I should find a way to get over you some how.__  
__Is it really over now?__  
_

"Hey," Cam walked into the kitchen to find his girlfriend, the guys following behind.

"Oh umm," Rachel looked at the opposite kitchen cut out and back at them. "Hey."

"You ok?" Cam gave her a questionable look as she fidgeted on the counter.

"Fine," she answered a little too quickly. "I just assumed ya'll would be back you know later," she again tossed a glance over before looking back at them.

"Rach why are you acting so weird?" Matt questioned opening the fridge and grabbing a water for him and his friends.

"Yeah you are all jumpy," Jason waved his hand up and down her body making her roll her eyes.

"I'm not jumpy," she leaned her head against the cabinet behind her head. "I'm just tired, I didn't sleep well last night," she lied knowing she slept like a baby last night. She normally slept like a baby when she was with Cam.

"Well baby do you feel ok?" Cam grew concerned, walking over and touching her head.

"I'm fine," she gave a small smile at his concern. "I promise just tired," she lied again, secretly praying that the guys would leave the apartment, well at least one of them. "But Luke," she looked over her boyfriend's shoulder.

"Yeah?" the blonde leaning against the counter lifted his head.

"I have something in the car that I forgot to get out will you help me?" she jumped down, fixing her shirt, searching her mind for something in the car.

"Sure," Lucas spun the lid back on his water.

"I'll go with you," Cam offered, not getting why she wouldn't just ask him.

"No it's ok, I like ordering Lucas around," she teased and he rolled his eyes.

"Come on Crazy Girl," Lucas lifted his arm and Rachel looped it through. "What is it that you forgot?"

"Oh I-" she goes to answer but the thing she was trying to avoid walks into the kitchen, all in his boxer covered glory.

"Oh…" Adam scratched the back of his head completely uncomfortable. "I uhh…hello," he awkwardly smiled, tossing a glance over his shoulder.

"Hey," all the guys answered in the same dead tone, tossing a glance over at the tense blonde.

"I was…I was just…" he trailed off not at all wanting to admit he was coming into the kitchen to get his wallet. The wallet that held an extra condom since he and Brooke ran out of the box in her bedroom. He couldn't really admit that in front of her brother and ex.

"Adam…" Brooke giggled, spinning towards the kitchen. "What are you-shit!" she jumped behind her boyfriend when she noticed the kitchen full of people. "What are ya'll doing here? I thought you were going to be out late," she tugged Adam's shirt tighter around her body as she stood behind him.

"We came back early," Matt told her, keeping a glance between her and Lucas knowing what he had discussed at the beach was quickly vanishing from his mind.

"A few hours early," Rachel mumbled, slipping her hand down to Lucas's and stroking the back of his hand trying to calm him.

"I didn't umm…" Brooke tossed a glance over at Lucas to see him staring hard at her, seeing all the different emotions that flickered through him.

"Let's go get what you needed Rachel," Lucas tightened the grip on her hand and spun around out of the kitchen.

"I'm going to get dressed," Brooke laced her fingers through her boyfriend's, her whole plan being ruined, her whole mood being ruined. Yes of course she planned on spending her day with her boyfriend but she didn't plan on this happening and never planned on Lucas finding them like that. Even if they weren't doing anything it was pretty obvious what was happening and was about to happen. She would never do that to him again, not after the first day here and she really did think they wouldn't be home for awhile. Last time she talked to Cam they were at the beach, where they planned on being for awhile and then they were going to eat, neither of which clearly happened.

"Awkward," Jason mumbled against the rim of his bottle when the room cleared out, the other guys letting out a small laugh and eye roll at their friend.

_Tell me do you remember the first glance all the sun sets I have no__  
__regrets__  
__with you__  
__with you__  
_

"Luke…" Rachel said as he all but drug her through the apartment complex. "Lucas…" she tried again. "Luke you're hurting my hand," she slightly lied making him come to a dead stop.

"Sorry," he released it and looked down. "I didn't mean to."

"I know you didn't," she ran her eyes all over his broken body. "Oh sweetie," she threw her arms around him pulling him into a comforting hug.

"I thought you of all people would love this," he let out a dry laugh.

"I did too," she held him closer knowing all she wanted was him to hurt for hurting her friend but also knowing he has _never_ stopped hurting. Least Brooke has clearly had times of happiness, Lucas she knew for a fact not so much. "I didn't want you to see that."

"You tried," he smiled slightly at the fact Rachel he knew didn't need anything. Just didn't want him seeing what he saw. "I'm so stupid," he pulled back running his hand through his hair. "Why did I come here Rachel?"

"I don't know," she shook her head, not at all knowing that either.

"I thought maybe she would come back to me or forgive me. I never thought she would be _that_ in love with someone else," he threw his hand towards the apartment building.

"Luke you knew she had a boyfriend."

"But I thought _I_ was the one," he confessed. "I thought that even if she had someone else it wouldn't compare to what we had, what I swear to god we still _have_. That soon she would want me back. I mean she always came back to me Rach, every time she came back."

"I know Luke," she ran her hand slowly up and down his arm, knowing the hope he had was slowly starting to disappear. His look was different then the last time she saw him like that, his look this time had no hope.

"_He gloomy Gus," Rachel walked into her friend's bedroom as he sat on his bed. "Cam not here?" she asked but he grunted, spinning the dial on his iPod, head phone plugged in his ears. "Ya'll getting along?" grunt, "You ok?" grunt, "You want to have some hot hate sex?"_

"_Not funny," he finally spoke, eyeing the box in her hand._

"_It's from Brooke," she nodded her head, slowly sitting it on his bed. "Just some things I guess belong to you," she peered in the box, her fingers grazing over some things. "Do you have anything for her?" she asked and he nodded his head at the box on the chair by the door. "Oh I can take it to-"_

"_No," Lucas shook his head, finally showing some emotion. "If she wants her stuff she can come get it."_

"_Luke…"_

"_She can come and get it," he repeated, his voice more sure. _

"_Lucas call her," Rachel said moving over and sitting on the edge of the bed. "Just call confessing you still love her and don't give a shit what Cam says, because if I hear one more repeat of Love Story I will seriously slit her pretty little throat."_

"_Am I supposed to know what that means?" he raised a brow confused._

"_No because you have a dick which your girl referred to my boyfriend as. You know she has a pretty dirty mouth when she wants," she teased him cracking a smile._

"_Yeah I know," he looked down at the song on his iPod. It was something stupid he hated but let Brooke put on it because she wanted her very own playlist for when she was in his car. She told him all the songs made her think of him in a way and with her little smile he of course allowed it. He just secretly cursed every time one would play when his iPod was on shuffle. "She probably got it from being around me too much."_

"_Ya'll are going to be ok," Rachel promised, placing her hand on his knee. "I know that it may not seem like it now but I've never seen you like this before and I've seen you with __tons__ of girls."_

"_I've never loved anyone but Brooke before," he answered honestly looking up at his red headed friend. "She means everything to me Rach. I know it's wrong and I know I might lose my best friend over it but I don't think I can give her up. If he forces me to choose I don't even need to question it."_

"_And he knows that," she nodded. "I think that's why he hasn't told you too. Brooke he knows will choice him because they are blood, they are family but he doesn't want your answer. You're his best friend and he loves you. That's how I know it will all be fine because I don't think you two idiots really work without each other," she teased making him laugh._

"_I think your right," his smile dropped as he sat there a second. "But I don't work without her either," he admitted. "I need her to work Rachel; I don't think I can even function through every day without her."_

"_It's going to be ok," Rachel gave his knee a squeeze. "I promise just keep that hope because everything is going to work out."_

_Tell me is this the final straw? Did our love really matter at all?__  
__I guess I should find a way to get over you somehow__  
__Is it really over now__  
__oh baby__  
_

"I lost her didn't I?" Lucas finally spoke the one thing he never wanted to. "She's gone and I'm not ever going to get her back."

"Luke…" Rachel frowned not knowing the answer to give him, not sure she could give him the answer he wanted.

"I need to get out of here," he dropped her hand. "I just… I can't be in _there_."

"Lucas, where are you going?" Rachel asked, not at all liking the idea of him alone in a place he didn't know.

"I'm just going for a walk Rach," he told her.

"I don't think I like that, why don't I come?" she offered taking a step towards him.

"No," he waved his hand at her. "I get it Rachel," he swallowed the lump in his throat. "It took me awhile and it hurts like hell but I finally get it and accept it," he blinked a few times. "I just think I need some time alone to really process this it's over feeling," he gave a tight lipped broken smile before spinning away from her.

"Ok," Rachel said more to herself as she watched him spin out of the gate and onto the side walk, her heart actually breaking a whole lot more for her broken friend then she ever thought it would have.

_Is it really over now__  
__are we really over now_

_

* * *

_

**I know I've been MIA! I hope you all don't hate me. However I have some sad news. I have been in the processes of moving and I have no internet right now plus my computer got a virus and I haven't really had time to send it off to get fixed explaining my never updating. However I do sometimes get time off from work and visit my family and when I do I will try to write and update as soon as I can.**

**I hope you all enjoy the new chapter and look for another one. I'm at my grandparent's house right now and if I have some free time I will try and update my others. Hoping to get internet soon but make no promises.**

**Well anyway HAPPY HOILDAYS!**

**Review!**


	12. I Still Love You'

_If we walk away now  
There's no turning around  
Gotta say what I mean  
While you're here with me  
I'm not sure I'll find words  
To cover the hurt  
That I see in your eyes  
But I gotta try  
_

Lucas sat there thinking; thinking about everything that has occurred in the last two years of his life. He went from not caring about anyone to caring about too much for someone to losing them. A night of fighting and drinking lead him to a bar that night, sorta of like tonight. But much like that night no amount of alcohol could let the pain he felt numb even a little.

"_Brooke I am so sick of this shit!" Lucas yelled as he walked into his apartment with his girlfriend after a night out. After a night of watching some guy flirt with his girlfriend nonstop and his girlfriend just letting it happen._

"_Well don't be tired of it just quit acting like a damn idiot! God Lucas why would you for a second believe I still had any feelings what so ever for Chase? We broke up, we have been for almost a year now and I have been with you for almost a year now. You think you would believe I'm not going anywhere!" Brooke argued so tired of this conversation. So tired of arguing and making her boyfriend believe she had no feelings what so ever for her ex._

"_Yeah well with the way you spent the whole night throwing yourself at the guy!" Lucas scuffed walking over and pulling a beer from his fridge._

"_Don't you think you have drank enough tonight?" Brooke asked but Lucas just took the lid off tossing it on the counter and taking a sip._

"_Nope, I think I will drink as much as I want. Since you kind of do whatever the hell you want without listening to me, don't really think I have to listen to you," he shrugged downing his beer and brushing past Brooke to his living room._

"_Lucas will you stop being an ass for two seconds and really think what you are saying? I mean damn it he is my friend I can talk to him."_

"_Fine go talk to him. Talk to who you want see what I care." _

"_God you are such an asshole. A drunken asshole and I hate you right now!" Brooke yelled. She hated when Lucas got like this, when he got all jealous over nothing and then would drink to try to ignore his feelings but it just made everything worse._

"_Aww you hate me I am truly hurt," he mocked placing his hand over his heart. "I guess you should go run to your little Chase and get him to make you feel better."_

"_Wow, are you so insecure that you would think I would do that?"_

"_Oh baby I am not insecure at all. I know I am way better then that tool," Lucas pretended to laugh finishing off his beer and walking to grab another one but Brooke grabbed his hand to stop him._

"_Lucas take another beer and I swear to god I am out of here, I am not even kidding," she threatened. He drank too much, when he got upset he drank more then he should and when he drank he became someone she hated. His drinking seemed to slow down since they started dating but now he was like in old Lucas form._

_Lucas looked at her for a second then the beer in the fridge, then back at her and coldly replied with, "Tell Chase hi." Grabbing his beer and storming past her into his room slamming the door. Sitting there a few moments he heard the front door slam. With a sigh he looked at his beer before throwing it and smashing it against his wall causing it to explode and glass to go everywhere._

_He laid on his bed thinking about the ass he was for no reason. He knew Brooke didn't care for Chase, he knew she loved him but he was just so tired of that guy always around. He was tired of this feeling he was going to lose her because he knew she was better than him; that she was so much more then he deserved and he counted down the days until she realized that._

"_Hey baby it's me. I'm sorry I shouldn't have snapped at you. I shouldn't have drank so much but you know how I get when I drink. I'm sorry. Please call me back. I love you," he left her a message and as he laid there his phone never rang, not once and as the seconds became minutes and minutes became hours he climbed out of his bed craving and needing another drink. His fridge was empty and after a long debate he grabbed his keys and went to the bar down the road._

"You want another?" the bartender asked pulling Lucas out of his thoughts and Lucas just nodded as the older tattooed man walked over grabbing him another then sitting it down in front of him. He slipped his hand in his pocket pulling out the thing he had still yet to get rid of. Placing it between is thumb and index finger playing with it he sighed, "Just want to numb the pain a little."

_I know rocks turn to sand  
And hearts can change hands  
And you're not to blame  
When the sky fills with rain  
But if we stay or walk away  
There's one thing that's true  
I still love you  
I still love you  
_

Brooke just got back from Adam's. They went out to dinner that night and though Brooke felt bad leaving everyone to kind of do their own thing for the night she enjoyed spending time with her boyfriend, she felt like they definitely needed it. And after the awkwardness of them walking in half naked with the _entire _house there, she was more than glad to get out of her place.

"Hey guys what's up?" Brooke asked throwing down her purse and walking over to her fridge grabbing a bottled water then walking into the living room to see most her friends there, well all her friends just no Lucas. "Where is Lucas?" she asked and saw them all give each other worried glances.

"Umm..he…" Cam trailed off knowing his sister wouldn't like where he was.

"He what?" She asked taking a sip of her water then growing nervous with all the looks the group was tossing each other, "Guys where is Lucas?"

"Well he was just not having a good day," Jason said but Brooke still didn't get how that explained where he is.

"So he went for a walk?" She asked but they all shook their heads no, "Matt?" she turned look at him, "You never lie to me so tell me where he is?" she ordered.

"He just wanted to get out so he went to get a drink. You know to relax some," Matt shrugged trying to act like it was no big deal but saw by Brooke's face it was, they all knew it was.

"And ya'll let him!" she snapped and they all sat quiet, "Damn it guys you know he shouldn't drink! What the hell. Why would you let him go do that?" she yelled walking over grabbing her purse.

"Brooke wait where are you going?" Rachel asked knowing it was not a good idea for Brooke to go find him.

"I am going to go find him. Something all you should have done. Hell you shouldn't have let him leave!"

"Brooke, Lucas is a big boy. And you know like the rest of us if he wants a drink he will have a drink doesn't matter what any of us say," Cam tried to reason.

"Yeah well you should have tried," she snapped storming out of her apartment slamming the door before they said anything else.

_Can you search down inside  
Let go of your pride?  
If I forget trying to win  
And just let you in  
I didn't travel this far  
To watch it all fall apart  
So give me your hand  
And take a chance  
_

She drove down the road knowing there weren't many places Lucas could have gone since he had only been there a couple weeks. He didn't know much about this place and then that worried her because he could get drunk and get lost. She pulled into one bar after another to find them empty, well not empty just not having Lucas in them. As she made her way to one of the ones she brought them to a few weeks ago, her heart started to hurt thinking about maybe he wasn't at a bar because he went home with some girl, and then that thought made her think of when she found him in that very scenario.

"_Luke?" Brooke called entering her brothers and boyfriend's apartment. She felt bad about fighting with Lucas. She hated when they fought and hated even more she stormed out without fixing things. The apartment was dark but she saw his car outside so knew he was home, "Lucas?" she called walking into the living room flipping on the light to find no one but she did find his shirt from that night thrown across the couch._

_She headed down the hall towards his room and with every step she felt her heart race faster and faster by some noises she was hearing. Though it grossed her out the thought she prayed to everything the noises were coming from her brother's room. That him and Rachel came here instead of staying at her house and were in his room. But as her steps got closer to the bedrooms she realized her brother's door was open, it was open and his room was dark and no one was in it._

_She stopped in front of her boyfriend's room closing her eyes reaching for the door handle, taking a deep breath she heard someone moan his name. Someone moan her boyfriend's name and as bad as she wanted to run, get the hell out of there she couldn't stop her hand from turning the handle and opening the door to find the last thing she wanted to see._

"_Oh my god," she whispered covering her hand over her mouth as his head snapped to look at her._

"_Brooke…"_

"_Oh my god," she repeated but louder this time as she turned to leave. She wanted to run; she wanted to run as fast as she could but it was like her feet were against it and just walked down the hall. She placed her hand on her stomach as she walked feeling physically sick as tears ran steady down her cheeks. Stopping at the door cut out that entered into the living room she leaned against it letting in a long breath and when she went to let it out it just came out a long sob as she broke._

_She felt his arms wrap around her as she started to fall but his arms bringing her back up and she cursed herself for not fighting him off. Not pushing him away, but the shock of walking in on what she just walked in on was still set in and it was like she had yet to really grasp what the hell just happened._

"_God Brooke I'm sorry…that…that wasn't…" he tried searching for his words but failing so bad. He knew there was no way to explain it, he messed up, he got drunk he had sex with someone else and there was no way to explain that. She cried in his arms and he closed his eyes burying his face in her neck and hair and squeezing her tight, "Baby I'm sorry," he whispered._

"_No…" she choked out removing herself from his arms around walking almost zombie like towards the front door. _

"_Brooke please stop!" he begged grabbing her hand that she yanked away from him, "Brooke!" he yelled again grabbing her but this time when he did she spun around slapping him hard across the face._

"_Don't touch me!" she yelled finally letting everything take over, "Don't you ever touch me again!"_

"_Please just listen to me please ok that," he said pointing to his room, "Was just stupid. I was drunk and mad. I was pissed you wouldn't answer your phone and I didn't know where you were," he started but realized that it didn't matter, none of what he said mattered because it wasn't an excuse. And as the words actually came out he realized just how stupid they sounded._

"_So fucking someone else is your solution to me not answering my phone!" she yelled, "God I hate you. I hate you so much," she hissed heading back to the door._

"_Baby please stop. I'm sorry it was a mistake, please. God I love you so much!" he pleaded taking her hand. "I can fix this," he tried to say but she just pulled away from him._

"_Lucas you cheated on me! You can't fix that! You can't go back and let it not happen. You say you love me and claim it but you slept with someone else! You slept with someone else in the bed you claim to make love to me in god damn it!" She was trying so hard to be mad at him, not show pain but all she thought about was that she was losing him and she couldn't help but cry, "How could you do that?" she said in such a whisper she wasn't even sure he heard her._

"_Let me fix this please," he begged but she kept shaking her head no as tears fell down her face._

"_No Lucas you can't and I won't let you try because…because I'm done. We're done," she choked out turning to leave again._

"_Baby please don't say that...please don't. We can't be done, we can't," he pleaded as he felt the heat build in his eyes. "Pretty Girl please stop!" he begged but she didn't. She didn't stop she walked out the door with a slam. "I need you," he whispered falling against the wall staring at the door she just left._

_Brooke ran down the steps of the apartment building falling on the last step as tears seemed to not stop. "Damn it!" she cursed cradling her legs close to her body, "How could you?"_

_I know rocks turn to sand  
And hearts can change hands  
And you're not to blame  
When the sky fills with rain  
But if we stay or walk away  
There's one thing that's true  
I still love you_

Brooke shook her head at all thoughts because that didn't matter anymore. She just needed to find him and bring him home before he did something stupid he would regret. Pulling up at the last bar she could think of she grabbed her keys and walked inside but stopping dead in her tracks at the scene. He was there he was but he wasn't alone.

Some long hair blonde was talking to him. She had her legs crossed showing off her long tan legs and her back straight trying desperately to catch his eye but to Brooke's almost surprise it wasn't working. As the blonde seemed to ramble on about something Lucas just took a sip of his beer and peeled the label clearly not interested.

He looked down running his hand through his hair making it stick up every which way before tipping towards the bartender he needed another beer and after that Brooke knew it was time to step in. Slowly walking over to him without a word took a seat next to him and nodding at the bartender for a drink.

"Nice night don't ya think?" she smiled over at him and saw his head shoot up to look at her almost surprised she was there. She also noticed the blonde giving her a glare. "Hi I'm Brooke," she smiled sticking out her hand and the blonde just took it slowly telling her name was Sarah. "Well Sarah it was very nice to keep him company but I think you should get going," Brooke said in the nicest way possible.

"Well I was talking to him first. What makes you think he wants me to leave?" she asked and Brooke laughed looking at Lucas who was still just staring at her almost shocked she was sitting next to him.

"Broody how long has Sarah been sitting here?" she asked.

"Who?" he asked looking confused and finally breaking his long gaze on her as she pointed at the pissed looking blonde behind him. "Oh umm…I…I don't know," he said really not sure because he hadn't paid much attention to her.

"Yeah well bye-bye," Brooke smiled waving at her and the girl with a growl got up and walked away. "Well she was nice."

"I know I could have really liked her," he teased remembering this talk they had many times before dating. "What you doing here Brooke?" he asked moving his attention away from the Sarah blonde who already seemed to find someone else to talk to and look at the only girl who would be able to hold his attention tonight.

"I could ask you the same question," Brooke whispered running her hands through his hair and making it look a little more tamed.

"Don't do that," he said pulling away from her touch and Brooke slowly pulled her hand back mumbling an I'm sorry. "And don't give me that look," he mumbled not even having to look at her to know what look she is giving him.

"What look?"

"You know what look I am talking about. So stop," he said turning to look at her and she felt her heart break. He looked like a mess, he was clearly drunk well on his way there, his eyes were all blood shot and glassy looking, he had dark circles under his eyes and he just didn't look like the Lucas she once loved. "Why are you here Brooke?"

"I want to know your ok," she sighed.

"I'm fine. Couldn't be better," he said in a fake cheery tone.

"Luke…" she sighed not sure what to say, because he was anything but fine.

"You want to know how great my trip has been so far?" he asked but didn't let her answer before he continued. "Well before even getting in the car to come down here I had long sleepless nights because every time I closed my eyes I would have some damn dream about you. But it wasn't really a dream as much as memories but then the ride down I got yelled at by Rachel about how much of an ass I am. Oh I got here and got to hear you having sex with your boyfriend, which after that I should have just left. Then I get a front row seat to watch you two all lovey dovey shit the past three weeks. And then the icing on the damn cake which is my life I get to watch you dancing around half naked with this tool _after_ spending the night flirting with me, touching me and _almost_ letting you kiss me!" he pointed out and she so badly wanted to tell him that wasn't true but she knew it was crap. She did let all of that happen.

"I'm sorry," she glanced down but he completely dismissed her.

"But can I say something? No, I can't say anything because I am not supposed to be hurt, I am not supposed to be upset because I am the one who was the reason we ended. I am the one who cheated so it is impossible for me to be upset by anything," he said with a dry laugh taking a long sip of beer.

"Lucas I never said you couldn't hurt," she sighed.

"Yeah well the rest of the world would disagree with you," he frowned peeling on his label before finishing it off and asking for another.

"Luke maybe you should stop," she said in a soothing voice placing her hand on leg then looking at him and wondering how many he had so far; since he had two in the short ten minutes she sat here.

"Maybe I should but that doesn't mean I am," he laughed pulling his leg away from her hand and making it fall before taking his drink.

_Riding with me as close as before  
Whatever happens, I won't ask for more  
Here in my heart from now 'til the end  
Flame out or fly, we have to try again_

Brooke just sat there watching him drink beer after beer, and did nothing. Said nothing just watched. She knew she couldn't stop him but wasn't going to leave him alone so just waited. An about an hour of waiting he was all drunk and stupid, slurring half his words.

"Hello bartender," he called the older guy over.

"What can I get for ya son?" he asked about to cut the young blonde off anyway, would have cut him off sooner but once the young brunette showed up decided to let it go for now. Since she clearly wasn't going to let him drive home.

"What is your name?" Lucas asked tilting his head to the side moving his hand with it and almost spilling his beer.

"I'm Jim," the bartender told him and saw Lucas nod.

"Well Jim being a bartender you listen to peoples' lives or problems or whatever right?" Lucas slurred.

"Yes I have heard some stories," Jim nodded tossing a glance at Brooke who was too busy staring at the beer in Lucas's hand.

"Well I want to tell you mine," Lucas smiled "You see this girl next to me?" he asked nodding his head towards Brooke and Jim nods, "Isn't she gorgeous?"

"Yes son she is very pretty," Jim smiled over at Brooke who said a small thank you.

"Well you see she use to be mine. Wasn't I lucky?" Lucas slurred looking at Brooke "I had the most amazing and gorgeous girl and I messed it up," he said in a small whisper as he cupped Brooke's cheek and she just looked at him. "You want to know how?" he asked breaking his gaze on Brooke and dropping his hand.

"Luke come on why don't we go home?" Brooke tried to say grabbing onto his shoulder not really wanting the world knowing her business.

"No no I am telling Jim a story," Lucas said shrugging of her hand. "Now you see Jim I was jealous. So so very jealous I mean when your girlfriend looked like mine wouldn't you be jealous?" he said with a hiccup but didn't let Jim answer. "Of course you would but you see we got in a fight. We always got into fights but this one was different. I tried calling her. I tried and I tried and I failed and I failed," he said with a small laugh.

"Luke come on really lets go," Brooke pleaded.

"No, I am not done yet so just sit your pretty little butt down and let me finish," he said with another hiccup placing his hand on Brooke's leg to stop all her moving. "Ok…ok Jim you see I knew she was better than me. Everyone knew she was better than me, everyone but her. She didn't realize how much better she was then me so I just waited for the day when she realized that and that night I thought she finally did," he told him and Brooke frowned thinking he thought that and for reasons she will never know slipped her hand in his playing with his fingers. "I was drunk, I knew she hated it so of course I shouldn't have but there I was drinking myself into oblivion and when she never called back I got this image in my head that I couldn't for the life of me get out. I had this image, that my girlfriend was having sex with her ex. But she wasn't; she wasn't because she only had sex with me. I'm mean I did take her virginity."

"Lucas!" Brooke shrieked grabbing his arm but he again pulled away.

"So I got drunk, I got so so very drunk and there was this girl. Was she pretty? Hell I don't remember but she was there. And I had sex with her, but you know this girl was not so great. I mean I don't even remember the sex but I remember I said Brooke. Can you believe that? I called some girl while having sex Brooke and she said nothing; didn't stop us or nothing just let it go. So how much of a slut do you think she was?" Lucas laughed.

"I don't know but it looks like Brooke here is worried about you so why don't you let her take you home?" Jim tried to help but Lucas just shook his head no.

"You see Jim if I let her take me home I have to see Adam and I don't want to see Adam," Lucas slurred leaning over the bar toward Jim. "I really don't like him but shh don't tell Brooke," he laughed falling back into his seat.

"Luke, Adam isn't there so please will you come home with me, please?" Brooke tried to beg and thanked everything when Lucas stood up but he didn't really move just stood there and swayed some digging his hand in his pocket.

"You want to see something Jim?" he asked and Jim just nodded sure as he pulled out a small ring. "I was going to give this too her," he said and Brooke's hand dropped from his arm making him fall back in his seat as she stared at the ring in his hand mouth opened and eyes widened. "I was going to say Brooke Davis be my forever. I called her best friend and we went getting it even though Rachel told me I was nuts," he slurred and Brooke felt a tear burn in her eye and also a pain in her chest then she thought that he was going to ask her to marry him and on top of that Rachel knew. "But I didn't care if I was nuts because I was in love. I was so happy in love and I wanted to be with her forever. I was going to ask her to be with me forever but I didn't. Then Adam goes and gets her this…" he growled grabbing hand showing the ring, "but didn't even ask her to marry him. I was going to ask her but I didn't do it but it doesn't matter anymore," he frowned staring at the ring a little longer. "I don't really need this thing anymore," he said tossing it on the bar and start stumbling out the door.

Brooke stood in shock a few more seconds. Being completely frozen just like that night he kissed her at the club. Sending her through a completely world wind and she sat frozen a few moments before grabbing the ring off the bar and chasing after him to find him stumbling down the empty dark sidewalk.

"You bastard!" she yelled and sees him stop and turn to look at her.

"Are you mad at me again?" he asked and she walked up to him and slamming the ring into his chest.

"How dare you say that! How dare you come here bring this here and say that to me!" she snapped.

"I didn't say anything to you I said it too Jim," he smiled proudly like he won this argument.

"What is wrong with you? Why are you doing this to me?" she asked throwing her hands in the air.

"I'm not doing anything! I am just here, but I'm not here I don't know where I am," he sighs falling on the curb. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore," he mumbled running his hands through his hair as Brooke just stood there staring at him, "I'm glad I cheated on you."

She heard him, she did but she had to have heard him wrong, he did not just say that to her, he didn't actually say he was glad he cheated.

"What?" she said but her voice choked so bad she wasn't even sure it made a word more of a noise. It was like the word along with her breath all got stuck in her throat and all that pain she felt by him came rushing back.

"I said I was glad I cheated on you," he repeated turning his head to look at her holding her gaze for a second then looking back down. "I never made you smile like he does. I don't make you laugh or your eyes light up. Everything Adam does I never did too you," he whispered to her and Brooke closed her eyes as a single tear slid down her cheek at his words. "See I bet Adam never makes you cry," he said looking at her, "I made you cry all the time."

"No you didn't Lucas," she frowned shaking her head sitting next to him, "Lucas do you have any clue how happy you made me?"

"I don't know how, all I did was cause you pain."

"No you didn't. There was only two times in the whole time dating you when you hurt me one being that time we broke up for like a week because Cam thought us dating was such a bad idea."

"God he flipped when he found out. I have never seen someone so pissed at me in my whole life," Lucas said with a small laugh, "His whole what the hell were you thinking man that is my little sister. That is my baby sister and you are with her? What the hell!" he said in his best Cam voice.

"Yeah he acted like it was all you and that I was just a victim or something in the whole thing," Brooke agreed laughing and they both fell into a silence thinking about it all.

"Me cheating on you," Lucas whispered breaking the silence and Brooke turned to look at him, "The second time I hurt you bad was when I cheated on you," he said and she nodded. "I never deserved you," he whispered looking at her and Brooke could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"That's not true."

"I didn't want to hurt you."

"I know you didn't Luke," she whispered as another tear fell running her hand slowly through his hair, "God I loved you so much," she choked out as the tears fell faster.

"I still love you so much," he confessed and Brooke closed her eyes letting the feeling of hearing him say that sink in again. And it scared her that even after all this time, even with having Adam; hearing him say he loved her still makes her heart flutter.

She watches as he moves closer to her, his eyes opened the whole time and he tilts his head to the side stopping right in front of her lips. They are so close she felt his breath on her lips and felt his nose graze over hers, she felt her head telling her to move away from him but her heart yelling don't you dare. She saw him swallow hard and lick his bottom lip pausing waiting for her to stop him but when she doesn't she watches him close his eyes and slowly and softly touch his lips against hers.

She tasted his alcohol and he tasted her tears but neither broke apart. Neither move their bodies or pulled away just let their lips almost mold together. It's not deepened, it's not full of passion and lust and it's not like many kisses they have shared. It's soft and Brooke knew it was on his side full of so much love.

Brooke placed her shaking hand on his cheek and pulling away from him leaning the side of her head against his. "I should get you home," her heart raced as she stood up, wiping her hands on her pants and spinning away from him.

"No," he shook his head, standing up and grabbing her wrist, spinning her around and catching her mouth with his again. His tongue grazing over her soft bottom lip, sucking it between his and tangling her hair in his hand.

"Luke…" she whimpered against his mouth, hating herself for accepting when he deepened their kiss, swaying her towards the side of the bar and her back slamming against it. "Lucas…" she moaned in his mouth, digging her nails in his hair and pressing her mouth harder against his.

"Let me take you somewhere," he begged, sliding her arms around her small waist and smashing her body harder against his.

"No," she shook her head, pushing his mouth away. "Luke stop, we can't."

"Mmm…" he latched his mouth onto her neck, finding the spot quickly he would never forget.

"Luke…" she swallowed the moan not at all wanting it to come out, she couldn't. This was wrong, this was beyond wrong. "No stop," she jerked to the side away from him. "You're drunk," she blinked the tears and cursed the shaking in her voice. "And I need to get you home," she told him, Lucas resting his head against the brink wall, trying to make his breathing normal again. "Please Lucas," she took a step forward taking his hand. "Please let me take you home this time, please listen to me."

"Ok," he caved breathing in a deep breath and trying to push off the wall. But the alcohol seeming to rush through him and make him stumble.

"Come on," she pulled him towards her car, helping him inside before climbing into the driver's seat.

"Brooke…" he turned to look at her, tears slowly trickling down her face.

"Don't," she held her hand up to him. "Just don't say anything," she begged keeping her eyes focused on the road.

"And again I make you cry," he shook his head at himself and stared out the window, hearing the small cries that she tried to swallow and hating himself for crushing her all over again.

_If we stay or walk away  
There's one thing that's true  
I still love you  
I still love you_

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**Sorry its been so long.**

**Hope you enjoy **

**Please review.**


	13. Stop Fighting Love'

_I'm the one that loves you__  
__I'm the one that cared__  
__Night comes and I think of you alone__  
__We've changed__  
__Love remains__  
__So give me one more chance__  
__I'll wait another day__  
__Until there's nothing_

"_I hate storms," Brooke cringed curling into her sheets. "They scare me."_

"_What happened to the girl who loved the sky when it lit up with lightening?" Lucas wrapped his arm around her and laid his head on her shoulder. _

"_That was before a storm almost made me lose you," she brought her hand to lace through his fingers. "And I now hate them."_

"_You will never lose me," he rolled her over on her back so he could see her. "Stuff…stuff happens Brooke but you can't let it make you be scared of it. My Brooke Davis isn't afraid of anything." _

"_Your Brooke Davis is afraid of a lot," she reached up touching his cheek. "You scare me," she whispered and his brow creased. _

"_Why do I scare you? I don't want to scare you."_

"_That night I realized how much I need you Lucas. I lost you just a few weeks and my world ended. I couldn't even leave my house because I just felt so dead inside. I don't like someone holding that power over me. I don't like someone meaning so much to me."_

"_You listen here Brooke Davis," he grabbed her chin and turned her to look at him. "You are my world and I know you are scared and I understand that but if you give me your heart, if you give it to me fully I swear I will protect it from everything."_

"_Promise?" her bottom lip trembled. "Because if I give it to you I don't think I will ever want it back. You sure you want to have that responsibility? You sure you want to always be with me?"_

"_Yes," he answered without thinking. "I know not everyone wants me with you," he told her and she frowned. She hated he thought that, she hated even more it was true. She couldn't even count the amount of times her mom would sit down and talk about Lucas, or even Cam, who was better now, still wasn't thrilled with the idea. So many people, so many talks, so many people just not understanding. "But I swear Brooke I'm serious here. I will spend forever making you feel safe because I love you. My whole life is wrapped up in you and I promise that I will change. I will become someone they want with you and I will be that person Brooke."_

"_I don't want you to change," she ran her hands through his hair. "Lucas I love you. I fell in love with this person and I don't care what everyone else's thinks. They don't see you loving me when no one else is around so screw them."_

"_Brooke…"_

"_Lucas…" she took his face in her hands to look her in the eyes. "Don't change. Don't become someone who isn't you just because you think everyone will be happy about it. You're a good person, a great person and you can do anything you want."_

"_I don't know if I can Brooke," he frowned. "I don't know if I can give you all you deserve. This may be my life always," he shrugged and she let out a small smile. _

"_I would be ok with that," she told him. "Just me and you laying in bed all day making love," she smiled at the idea. "Then maybe one day have a baby, you think you would want a baby with me?"_

"_Yeah," he smiled brushing back her hair. "I would want a baby with you, as many as you would want."_

"_A little boy just like his daddy," she grinned leaning up and giving him a gentle kiss. _

"_No, I want a little girl with her mother's smile," he admitted looking down at her. _

"_Maybe we should start practicing," she smirked, sliding her leg up a little his body positioning perfectly on top of her. "You know to be safe. Just so when we are ready we can have one quick."_

"_Yeah?" he lifted himself up a little to line up against her and sliding slowly inside._

"_Yeah," she moaned, arching her back and closing her eyes. "That feels good…"_

"_You feel good," he smirked, dropping his mouth to her neck. "So damn good baby," he rocked himself on top of her loving the noises she makes. _

"_Luke…" she ran her fingers through his hair. "I love you," she moaned, him lifting his head to cover her mouth with his whispering, "I love you too."_

_Stop fighting love__  
__Baby I just want to know the reason why__  
__Stop fighting love__  
__Don't say goodbye__  
__And you'll be back in my arms again_

The loud crash was what woke her from her dream. If she is honest she doesn't ever hear a thunderstorm and not think of that day together. It had stormed the whole weekend and her and Lucas never left his bed. They made love more times then she could count and Lucas repeated his love for her the whole weekend. The only time they left the bed was when Lucas climbed from it and made them something to eat. Just to return to the bedroom and make love all over again.

She loved Adam, she did and when they slept together she felt amazing, it felt amazing but Lucas as a lover…god she shivered every time she thought of it. She didn't know if it was because he was her first love, her first time or anything but being with him was so different then Adam. They touched her different, kissed her different, moved different but though they were both good, very good something about being with Lucas was...she didn't want to say better, it wasn't better it was just different.

When the door cracked open she didn't have to even turn over to see who it was. She knew, she felt it in her heart, heard it with his footsteps, with his movements. She knew every inch of that boy, every scar, every freckle, everything so when he was around she knew it. Just like she knew he knew she was awake. The stupid connection she couldn't understand.

"Please…" she begged when his arms came around her as she laid in her bed. "Please don't hate me…"

"Why would I hate you?" he pulled himself closer to her, enjoying the smell of strawberries that hit him in the face.

"Because…" her voice cracked, lacing her fingers through his. "Because I need you to forget about that kiss…"

"Brooke…I can't…" he shook his head, kissing the back of her shoulder, hating when he heard her whimper.

"You were drunk and I was just…I was being stupid…" she tried to convince knowing it was no hope. "Please Lucas, please forget it."

"But I love you," he whispered, flipping her over to look at him. "And Brooke I think you love me still too."

"Please stop…" she pleaded, a tear dropping to her pillow.

"Remember our rule?" he rested his forehead against hers and her eyes closed. "You came up with it, so I know you remember…"

"We can't…" her voice cracked.

"Tell me you remember…" he grabbed her chin and tilted it up.

"Of course I remember…" she opened her eyes too look at him.

_I can make it better__  
__I can make it right__  
__If only you could try and see the light__  
__Someday__  
__Someway__  
__I'm gonna make you see__  
__That I've paid__  
__For my mistakes__  
__Until there's nothing_

"_I never thought I would love a storm so much," Lucas teased, pouring him a drink. "Here you go," he handed Brooke the glass as she sat on the counter. _

"_Yeah, just wish the power would come back on," she took a sip as her boyfriend moved in front of her. "That candles are going to burn out completely soon," she glanced over at the waxed object flickering low. _

"_Then it's just you, me and the darkness," he ran his hands up her bare thighs as she sat with just his shirt on._

"_As long as there is the you and me part I don't mind so much the darkness," she tilted her head to the side as he started kissing up her neck. The crackling outside making her pulse race, just adding to what he was doing. "You know what I think?"_

"_We should go back to bed?" he smirked making her giggle._

"_No," she pulled her neck away from him and he lifted his head to look at her. "Well yes but no…"_

"_Don't think I like that…" he frowned and she laughed._

"_Some of our defining moments have involved storms," she pointed out and he grinned._

"_First time I kissed you it was storming," he reminded her knowing that the night at the club was one hell of a storm. "And the first time I said I love you, it wasn't storming but it was raining pretty hard."_

"_Maybe it's like a sign," she suggested and his brow creased. "Storms are our thing. Every storm I'm in makes me think of you. Like God is trying to remind me or something. Trying to make me remember that all of the happiest and scariest moments of my life involve thunder and you." _

"_So what are you thinking then?"_

"_A storm is like our recharge time," she said and he looked confused. "From now on every time it storms we do something."_

"_We do something?"_

"_Yup," she slid her arms up around his neck. "So whenever it storms we don't think about the scary storm but of all the fun and good times we had."_

"_Well ok," he chugged down the rest of her drink and sat the glass on the counter. "Up we go," he threw her over her shoulder and she squealed._

"_Lucas!" her legs flew up a bit as he held her secure. "What are you doing?"_

"_Making a memory," he walked into his bedroom and threw her onto his bed. _

"_And what memory is that?" she bit her lip having an idea. Growing a little confused when she watched him walk over to his closet. "Baby?" she tilted her head to the side finding him disappear in the small closet._

"_I'm coming," he dug through his stuff before locating what he wanted. "Ok," he walked back in the room, dropping down beside his girlfriend. "This," he held up a small metal heart on a black silk ribbon. _

"_Luke…" she touched the heart smiling. "What's this?"_

"_Well," he wiggled up on the bed and propped his head on his hand looking at her. "My car as we know is forever destroyed…"_

"_I'm sorry."_

"_Hey," he grabbed her chin to look at him. "You're safe, that's all that matters," he told her and she nodded however still looked sad. "But I loved that car, can't even lie. And now," he reached up hooking it behind her neck. "You hold everything I love," he shrugged and she smiled. _

"_What's the date?" she looked at the back with the engraving._

"_That my beautiful baby is the day I realized I was in love with you."_

"_But we weren't even together then," she told him and a gentle smile graced his face._

"_I know."_

"_Luke…" she slid her hand through his hair bringing him down to kiss her. "I love you," she whispered, "so much," she brought him back down to kiss her. "And here I thought you just wanted to have sex," she giggled against his mouth and he laughed._

"_I do, that's my rule," he ran his hand up under her shirt, well his shirt. "Stormy weather means good day for Lucas," he grinned like a kid on Christmas._

"_You're stupid," she rolled her eyes before breaking into a grin. "But it's ok, I wouldn't change it."_

"_Good," he wiggled out of his boxers and started to tug her shirt over her head. "Because stupid me wants a naked you," he joked, looking down at her, smiling before covering her mouth with his._

_I let your lust for love excite me__  
__You took my heart instead__  
__And now there's nothing_

"What am I supposed to do here Brooke?" he questioned dropping his head to rest against hers. "Everything is telling me to not give you up again."

"I don't know," she breathed in deep. "I had everything figured out just fine until you showed up. Now everything is so complicated."

"I'm sorry," he frowned. "I don't want to keep hurting you. I don't want to make things hard for you but god Brooke what I feel… I know you feel it Brooke."

"I don't," she shook her head quickly. "I can't…"

"Yes," he cupped her cheek, stroking the soft skin until her eyes opened up again. "Yes you can. If you didn't feel anything this wouldn't be hurting you so bad. You wouldn't be so confused and upset. Just tell me what you feel Brooke."

"It doesn't matter what I feel," she shook her head.

"That's the only thing that matters," he growled, tightening his hand in her hair.

"I don't want to hurt you Lucas, please don't make me hurt you," she begged.

"I'm already pretty damaged Brooke, nothing can hurt me anymore."

"I love him," she whispered seeing the pain shoot through him. "I need him Lucas, I want _him_."

"Am I stupid to admit that I was thinking you _might_ say something different?"

"I haven't been fair to you. I've been confusing you and I know and I'm sorry Lucas. God I'm so sorry," a tear fell making his heart hurt.

"Even if you don't want to admit it, even though I know you feel like you can't admit it but I know you love me Brooke. I feel it, when you look at me or touch me, when you kissed me…" he said the last part low and her eyes once again closed. "How am I just supposed to forget that? How am I just supposed to pretend I don't know that?"

"Lucas…" she breathed in deep to calm herself. "Please, if you ever loved me like you said, if you love me like you say now please Luke, please forget about that kiss. Please," her voice cracked and his head dropped. "I'm begging you, please. That one moment…that one moment of me being weak could ruin everything. I will take blame I will, it was my fault, I shouldn't have done that and I get if you hate me for letting it happen but please," she let out a sob and he swallowed hard hating she was hurting again. "Please forget it, please."

"I'm sorry," he whispered, bringing his lips to kiss her forehead. "I'm so sorry for everything I've put you through, but just know," he dropped his gaze to look her in the eyes. "I could never hate you Brooke, even with everything, I understand you hating me but know I could never and will never hate you."

"For what it matters, I stopped hating and blaming you a long time ago," she admitted and he nodded.

"I love you, I always will," he gave her a gentle kiss that he didn't give her a moment to react to before pulling back. Moving from her bed and suddenly Brooke finding herself alone. The storm not at all easing up.

_Stop fighting love__  
__Well I just want to know the reason why__  
__Stop fighting love__  
__Don't say goodbye__  
__Stop fighting love__  
__Baby there's no reason why__  
__Stop fighting love__  
__Don't say goodbye__  
__And you'll be back in my arms again__  
__Stop fighting-stop fighting love__  
__Stop fighting-stop fighting love__  
__Stop fighting-stop fighting love_

_

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_

**Review!**


	14. I Would've Loved You Anyway'

_If I'd've known the way that this would end__  
__If I'd've read the last page first__  
__If I'd've had the strength to walk away__  
__If I'd've known how this would hurt...__  
_

"Where's Brooke?" Cam asked as they sat in the kitchen. "Is she still in bed?"

"Yeah," Rachel glanced at the clock. "I hope she feels alright," she looked down at the brooding blonde who is moving his cereal around in his bowl. She knew Brooke had gone out and got him the night before, she knew both came home in a weird mood and that as soon as Brooke got Lucas in bed she darted into her room and no one had talked to her since. It made her worry.

"I'm sure she is fine," Matt shrugged. "She had a long last few days, I'm sure she is just burnt out."

"Yeah, I hope that's it," the red head watched the blonde as he stood and placed his bowl in the sink.

"I'm going to go take a shower," he somewhat mumbled as he pushed through the crowded kitchen and out the door.

"You think he is ok?" Jason nodded his head at his friend and the room just shrugged.

"I doubt it. He is probably hung over and on top of that has had a seriously bad vacation," Cam commented not sure how his friend did it. It took him almost a month to convince his friend to come and he even almost chickened out the last five minutes before they left. He promised it would be fun, it would be easy and that it wouldn't be awkward at all.

He was wrong.

"_I'm not going Cam. Look you all will have fun and don't need me there," Lucas shrugged not getting the big deal. So he didn't want to go, it's not like him _not_ going was going to somehow screw everyone else's vacation. They would have fun; he didn't need to be there._

"_But dude we may not get another chance to take a trip together," he pointed out._

"_We've taken plenty of trips together."_

"_Yes but now this is probably our finally for awhile. You know I love Jay and Matt but obviously I want my best friend there. I mean Matt's so serious sometimes and Jay is never serious. You are a good medium," he teased and Lucas rolled his eyes._

"_I'm glad you are only my friend because I'm a medium between freaking Einstein and a potato."_

"_See no one else would take it that well," Cam teased getting a laugh. "Come on man I want you there."_

"_You're the only one," he shuffled through his dresser for something to wear. Cursing when he found a photo tucked underneath them all. "I doubt she wants me within a hundred feet of her," he frowned looking at the photo and hating how the last time he saw her went. If he knew she would be gone when he woke he would have never gone to sleep. _

"_She's better Luke. She's over it and moved on and I'm sure doesn't think about it."_

"_Wow makes me feel better," he grumbled hating if that was true. If she didn't think about it or him anymore it meant she was over him. He didn't think he wanted her over him yet._

"_You know what I mean dude. Plus I mean it's you and Brooke," he tossed his hand up. "Things rarely stay awkward between y'all."_

"_I cheated on her, she literally caught me in bed with someone else," he reminded him with a dead tone._

"_Maybe she doesn't remember that night, that much," he offered and Lucas titled his head to the side. _

"_She slapped me, told me she hated me and wanted me to explain how I could possible fuck someone in the bed I claim to make love to her in," he repeated the line that played over and over again in his head and hated he still didn't have an answer for that._

"_Gross…" Cam stood from the bed looking down at it. "I always tried to forget you two did that," he moved as far from the bed as he could and leaned against his friend's desk._

"_Well if it grosses you out that much, I wouldn't sit on that desk either," he pointed, before scanning around the room. "Or that wall, or that computer chair…oh yeah don't sit on the window ceil either."_

"_Damn Luke, what the hell is the matter with ya'll. There is a damn bed right there," he cringed, taking the choice to just stand in the center of the room. _

"_Won't me to go into what not to get near in the rest of the apartment?" he teased very aware of every spot he and Brooke made love. The couch, the floor, Cam's favorite chair, bet he would hate that one. The shower, the counter in the bathroom that lead to the shower, the kitchen table, the kitchen counter, a few chairs in there, just some places he was sure Cam did not want to know about._

"_Please stop talking," Cam held up his hand and the blonde laughed. "But still man, it's been a year. It will be fine."_

"_Can I just give you an I'll think about it?"_

"_If it means you actually will," he shrugged heading to his door._

"_Cam…" he called and the boy stopped at the door. "Why are we ok? You warned me about being with her and I ignored it and did what I wanted. Then I really hurt her so why…why are we ok?" he asked still baffled by it. Cam hated him when he first found out about them so he figured when he proved him right with being an asshole that they guy would just banish. _

"_I hated you Luke," he admitted. "I hated you for awhile if I'm honest but we live together. I saw you every day and I saw the things you went through after the break up and I realized something."_

"_Which was?"_

"_That you really did love her," he shrugged. "My fear with you two dating wasn't that I thought you weren't enough for her. My fear was my little sister was going to fall in love and never get the love back. I hated to think she would give herself to someone who didn't deserve it."_

"_I did love her Cam; I don't think I've ever loved someone like I did her."_

"_I know," Cam nodded. "Before Brooke left she told me something. She said he loves you and he is going to need you and to forget what happened between you and her because it had nothing to do with you and him. That she was worried you being alone and needed to know someone would take care of you. That she had forgiven you. So if she could forgive you what was wrong with me not to?"_

"_Cam I know what I did wrong with her. I know I lost her and won't ever get her back. I just…I don't want to want and need her anymore. Its' be a year shouldn't that feeling pass?"_

"_I don't know man," he told him honestly not so sure how long it would take him if he lost Rachel. He was sure a long ass time. "Maybe it hasn't gone away because maybe it's still right. Maybe we don't get fully over someone if they are _the_ one."_

"_You think Brooke is my one?"_

"_I don't know man. I just know that as of now she isn't," he answered truthfully and Lucas nodded. "Let me know what you decide," he gave a small nod before walking out._

"I think I might go for a walk. Want to come Rach?" Cam turned to his girlfriend who nodded.

"Yeah, let's go," she popped grape in her mouth and skipped off the stool skipping out of the room.

_I would've loved you anyway__  
__I'd do it all the same__  
__Not a second I would change__  
__Not a touch that I would trade__  
__Had I known my heart would break__  
__I'd've loved you anyway_

She should get up, she should go see her friends and talk to them but she couldn't. She couldn't see him because she was so afraid if she did she would just cry again and she was over crying over him. But all she thought about was when she brought him home. All the feelings that rushed through her when he kissed her and that scared her.

"_Don't!" Brooke snapped her hand up when her friends move towards her. "Don't help me," she ordered, trying to keep her feelings in check as she held her arm around Lucas's waist._

"_Brooke he is too big to be pulling on…"Cam took a step toward her. _

"_Trust me, it's not the first time alright," she shook her head, Lucas's arm resting over her shoulder as he stumbles down the hall to the back room. He was in good shape for awhile but she was sure on the way home all the alcohol hit him and then he slept for a moment and now he really didn't know what way was up anymore._

"_I can do it," Lucas mumbled as he tripped over the doorway and into his room. _

"_I know but I'm going to help you," she shut the door behind her nervous they might hear them. They might hear Lucas drunkenly make a comment about their kiss. "So just let me help you ok?"_

"_Ok," he sat on the bed, telling she was just exhausted. "I'm sorry…" he apologized, as she sat down to tug his shoes off. "I didn't mean to drink so much."_

"_Its fine Lucas," she shook her head really wishing he would stop talking. She had too many things running through her mind and him still talking wasn't helping anything. _

"_I just kept seeing the image of you and him in my head," he fell down on his back. "I want it out."_

"_He's my boyfriend Lucas," she reminded him and watching him cringe. "I'm sorry it hurt you but he is my boyfriend."_

"_I know," he ran his hands over his face. _

"_Come on, sit up for me," she tugged his hands to sit him up right. "It worries me when you drink," she told him, taking her small hands and popping the buttons on his shirt. "I mean if I wasn't there…something could have happened to you."_

"_Maybe it would have been better," he mumbled, scratching his neck. "Make lot of people happy…" he shrugged and Brooke let out a dry laugh. Standing up and walking to the door to breathe a moment. Trying to control herself but knowing it was no hope, she finally felt everything in her snap. Flexing her fingers in and out of a fist she moved back over to him and when he looked up at her she just reared back as hard as she could and slapped him right around the face. So loud she wondered if the rest of the house heard her. _

"_What is the matter with you?" she snapped and his head dropped as he rubbed his stinging cheek. "Do you not think of anyone else? How could you even say something like that? Say something like that to _me_?"_

"_Brooke…"_

"_No!" she slapped his hand away when he reached to touch her. "Do you know what I would do if something happened to you? So many people count on you Lucas and you just go and say stupid shit like that! That is not ok!"_

"_I shouldn't have said that… I don't mean it. It just…it came out," he looked down knowing he didn't want anything happening to him, he didn't know why he said that. He just felt like he was always screwing up and always hurting people. "I just feel lost Brooke," he tossed his hand up. "I feel like I'm unimportant now because everything I do hurts someone. Everything I do is always hurting you."_

"_Luke…" she dropped beside him on the bed, taking his broken face in her hands. "God Broody," she rested her head against his breathing in deep. "I'm not hurting anymore Luke. Why don't you see that?"_

"_Because I know you," his eyes opened to look at her. _

"_I know you do," she reached up stroking his cheek. "I need you to be ok. I can't go through life thinking you aren't."_

"_Do you regret us?" he asked. "I don't, I never would but I just…do you wish we never happened?"_

"_No," she shook her head. "It hurt Luke, it hurt so bad that I swore for a moment that must be what dying felt like but I wouldn't change it. I try…I try not to focus on the bad time. I try to think about all the good ones because there were a lot of good times," her voice cracked and he nodded. "There may be things I regret in life Lucas but being with you…loving you, I would never regret that."_

"_My biggest regret was letting you go," he admitted and she nodded knowing that. _

"_Go to sleep Broody," she leaned back pulling back his sheets. "I'll see you in the morning ok?" her voice cracked a little as she tucked the sheet around him and he nodded. "Try to sleep," she leaned down kissing the side of his head. Rushing out of the room before her emotions got the best of her and made it back to her room._

She thought that was going to be enough to make her morning hard but for him to return that night just made it worse. She didn't want to get out of bed. She knew she had to at some point but she was just wishing that point would be in like a month when no one was in her house anymore. That wouldn't be that bad.

_I would've loved you anyway__  
__I'd do it all the same__  
__Not a second I would change__  
__Not a touch that I would trade__  
__Had I known my heart would break__  
__I'd've loved you anyway_

"Hey…" Brooke felt someone shake her body and she just curled into her sheets. "Come on baby you need to get up."

"I don't want to," she mumbled pulling the sheet over her head. "My head hurts," she lied hoping that would just get them to leave her alone.

"I know but it's almost one and you haven't come out of your room. Everyone outside thinks you're dead," he chuckled and she just growled at him. "Come on," he tugged the sheet down, leaning down to kiss her neck, making a small sigh escape her. The tickle of his beard making her body tingle a little. "Come eat something," he trailed his line up to her ear and she grinned.

"Did you make me something?" she opened her eyes hating the feeling of guilt and love that shot through her. She knew no one understood it but she did love Adam, she loved him a lot and maybe it was different from the love she had for Lucas and maybe it hadn't grown to be as strong but she did love him. He was good to her, took care of her, made her feel safe always.

"I can make you something," he told her and she smiled. "Come on gorgeous," he pulled the sheet off to see her. "Let's go eat."

"Carry me," she whined and he chuckled.

"You're too much," he slid his arms under her small body and lifted her in his arms. "And so damn sexy," he smirked and she giggled, burying her face in his neck.

"Maybe I should put something else on," she glanced down at her short cheer shorts and an old long sleeve cheer shirt from high school.

"No you look fine," he shrugged, carrying her towards the door and out of the room.

"Is anyone here?" she shifted a little uncomfortable in his arms, suddenly realizing she didn't want Lucas to see her with him.

"Yeah, its storming so they are all in the living room watching movies," he told her and she shifted a little more not liking it was storming and not liking she was just a few minutes away from seeing Lucas again. "Alright," he sat her down on the counter and walked over to the fridge. "Want some coffee?"

"Yeah I haven't had my morning cup yet," she told him knowing it wasn't morning anymore but still needing the caffeine fix.

"Yeah thought so," he chuckled grabbing the blue tub and taking it over to the coffee pot. Brooke looking him over as he fixed the pot. Reaching up and running her fingers through his hair knowing she had to tell him what happened with Lucas. She couldn't stand looking at him and knowing she kissed someone else. It made her feel terrible. She didn't want to hurt him but she didn't want to lie to him either.

"I love you," she whispered resting her chin on his shoulder. "You know that don't you?" her voice quivered a bit and he turned his head looking at her with that gentle smile that made her feel worse.

"I love you too," he lifted his chin giving her a sweet kiss. "I've missed you thought. I hate I've been so lost with school and ball I let it interfere with being with you."

"No, it's important I understand," she told him quickly not at all wanting him to feel bad about that.

"Yeah," he squeezed her leg and she nodded, swallowing the large lump in her throat.

"Adam…" she looked up to confess everything and her heart stopped when she noticed the blonde spinning into the kitchen. His body freezing completely.

"Oh…" he glanced at her, over at Adam and then rubbed his neck awkwardly. "You're up."

"Yeah," she played with her necklace nervously and he nodded. "How do...you feel?" she asked and he shrugged.

"I'm good. I just thought I smelled coffee," he glanced at the pot and Adam nodded.

"Yeah, man there is enough. You want some?"

"Sure…" he stepped over to grab a cup from the cabinet, Adam stepping to the side and over to the fridge. Brooke keeping her eyes nervously on the floor when Lucas stepped right beside her and started to make himself a cup.

She really wasn't sure how Adam couldn't see the weird tension between the two but he didn't. She could feel it, feel how her body was stiff and how Lucas fumbled around with the spoon and pot and sugar clearly wanting to just get out of there. She wasn't sure if he was feeling uncomfortable around her or Adam but he looked more the uncomfortable in the room with the both of them.

"So Pretty Girl what do you want to eat?" Adam's voice trailed in and both heads snapped over at him. Lucas getting almost a pain look on his face hearing that and Brooke realizing if it wasn't coming from Lucas it sounded so wrong.

"What?" her voice cracked looking at him and he lifted his head from the fridge to look at her.

"To eat? What did you want me to make you?"

"Oh umm…" she rubbed her hand to her brow trying to relax some. "Anything I guess…anything works," she told him and saw how Lucas dropped his spoon with a head shake and walked out of the room, suddenly hearing the sound of the bathroom door closing.

She wanted to run to him, tell him that was a slip up and Adam didn't call her that all the time. That was the first time and that even hearing it made her think of him. They had special names for each other, that was _his_ name for her and even if it was a small pet name she knew it meant something to him and she wanted to tell him that. She wanted to rush to make that clear but she didn't. Instead she breathed in deep and calmed herself and _forced_ herself to stay.

_It's bittersweet to look back now__  
__At mem'ries withered on the vine__  
__But just to hold you close to me__  
__For a moment in time..._

"Oh my god I'm so over this weather," Rachel groaned slamming her head against the back rest.

"Yeah, it's just how Florida is," Brooke shrugged. "Some of the prettiest weather but also has some of the worst storms," she ran her finger along the rim of her glass, cutting a look over at Lucas who's eyes were locked on hers before both looked away.

"Well I don't like it. I'm bored," she frowned and Cam laughed.

"You're always moving can't you just relax and enjoy the calming of the storm?" he asked, running his hand through her hair as she shifted to rest against him.

"I guess."

"What you thinking Luke?" Jason asked his friend who looked about a million miles away.

"Nothing," he shook his head, stretching his arms above his head. "Just tired."

"You feeling alright?" Matt asked and the boy just nodded shifting a little really embarrassed by his actions the night before. "I don't think I've seen you like that in awhile."

"I haven't been like that in awhile," he mumbled against the rim of his glass not wanting to think about the last time he was drunk.

"I haven't seen you drunk in awhile," Cam teased trying to pull the attention off his friend who he knew was uncomfortable.

"Oh yeah, last year after my night of being so stupid I made out with Brooke I decided against it," he laughed a little until it registered what he said and Brooke's eyes widened looking at him.

"What?" Lucas's head snapped up to look at his said best friend and ex. The line _last year _and _made out with Brooke _sticking in his head. "Last year?"

"Lucas I…" Brooke tried to think of something, anything to say to make this better yet she knew that wasn't going to happen.

"No," Lucas threw his hand up to silence her. "What did you just say?" his look scared many people in the room, as his body stiffened and fist tightened.

"Luke man it…alright that wasn't supposed to come out," Matt tried to back track never meaning to tell his friend that. Other then Cam, he was closets to the blonde who right now looked like he was about to throw him off the balcony.

"But it did come out!" his voice got raised as his body jerked upward. "It came out and someone is going to tell me what the hell happened!"

"Man maybe you should calm down," Cam tried to jump in yet knew it was again pointless.

"No, am I the only one who didn't know this?" he spun around watching everyone recoil into their seats.

"I didn't know," Rachel admitted not even hiding the glare she sent over at her best friend. All this time she thought Lucas was a piece of shit yet what Brooke did wasn't any better. However she didn't really know the entire story so she wasn't going to judge too much…yet.

"Lucas look it didn't mean anything," Matt leaned up in his seat. "I was drunk and…and you knew before ya'll dated I had a thing for her."

"No I didn't know that!" Lucas snapped, "I didn't know any of that! And even if I did what makes you think it was ok to go after her when we were together! You knew what she meant to me, you knew how much I loved her!"

"Broody-"

"Don't!" Lucas's hand went up at her again, "Don't call me that," his glare towards her even making her heart hurt. He has never made her feel what he just did with that one look.

"Ok don't talk to her like that," Adam defended his girlfriend however Lucas just seemed to only notice the brunette sitting on the couch holding his gaze.

"This whole time you have made me feel like I was the one who ruined this relationship, it was all my fault. I lost everything and was the bad guy in all of this and I let it be, I let everyone hate me because I did screw up but least I owned up to it. You…you just buried it and let me take the fall for it all."

"I didn't sleep with someone else Lucas! And if I hadn't walked in on it how would I have known you would even of owned up to it?"

"Because I loved you damn it!" he yelled making her flinch. "I loved you so damn much that it killed me inside and you cheated on me with my best friend! God Brooke my best friend! I would have preferred it be someone I didn't know, hell I would have wished it was Chase but no it was my best fucking friend!"

"I didn't sleep with him," Brooke swallowed hard, blinking away the tears in her eyes. "I didn't."

"No but you never told me either," he dropped his hands to his side completely over all of this.

"I was going to tell you! He kissed me and all I thought was this is going to kill Lucas, this was going to completely crush him and all I wanted was to be with you. I wanted to come there that night and explain and I wanted to work things out because I loved you! And look what I got, a front row seat to see you and some slut enjoying your night a hell of lot more then I was."

"Least you didn't know her, but hey maybe I should have just fucked Rachel and it would have made us even," he spun on his feet to get away from her, to get away from all of them.

"You asshole!" Brooke stormed passed her friends towards the hall the pissed blonde had just moved too.

"Brooke," Cam reached for his sister as she passed but she just shoved his hand away.

"Fun night yeah?" Jason tried to lighten the mood as he leaned back in his chair not at all comfortable with the tension in the room.

_And even if I'd seen it coming__  
__You'd still've seen me running__  
__Straight into your arms_

"Don't you ever yell at me like that," Brooke stormed into the room slamming the door. "I messed up ok I did and I should have told you but you are not going to make it seem what I did was so much worse then what you did," she hissed yet he sat still on his bed, face in his hands.

"God," Lucas ran his hands over his face, "It's not supposed to be like this. We aren't supposed to be like this."

"There isn't a _we_ anymore Lucas, there isn't a we or an us or anything," Brooke sighed seeing the anger build up in him all over again. "We finished a long time ago and I am with Adam-"

"That isn't right either," he growled shoving himself off the bed "It was supposed to be you and me Brooke, not you and him!" he yelled back annoyed, "It was always supposed to be us!"

"You want to get the us part Lucas?" she asked with a bitter laugh.

"Yes Brooke all I want is the us part."

"You want the end to be you and me, than you don't cheat on me damn it! You don't fall into bed with some cheap slut in a short dress!" Brooke yelled back not in the mood to argue with Lucas about this, not when her boyfriend is just in the other room.

"I thought you were with him! I thought you were off with him somewhere and cheating on me! Hell how was I supposed to know it was my best friend instead!" He snapped still not believing any of that. How could his best friend even think about touching his girlfriend, touching his Brooke?

"It was nothing Lucas! It was just a kiss, a kiss that meant nothing!" She yelled throwing her hands in the air. Why the hell did Matt have to drop that little bomb on them, yes it's the past and its over but still she didn't want Lucas to ever find out.

"Aren't you the one that says a kiss always means something?" He challenged, "That a kiss between two people never just happens it always means something, anything!"

"That kiss meant nothing Lucas," Brooke said in a hushed tone knowing he wasn't referring to her kiss with Matt anymore.

"It's me and you Brooke we both know a kiss between us always means something," he said in a calmer tone as he walked closer to her. "Why can't you just admit it? Why can't you just admit you still feel something?"

"Because I don't!" She shook her head taking a step back away from him, "I love Adam; everything in me loves Adam."

"Everything in you doesn't love him Brooke," Lucas objected taking a step closer to her.

"It does Lucas," she once again repeated as she kept taking steps back until her back hit the wall.

"Your it for me Brooke. At the end of the day, at the end of everything it will always be you," he told her standing right in front of her his body pressing up against hers. "I feel like I don't work if you're not in my life."

"Lucas you're being so selfish," Brooke shook her head not believing this and trying to stop her heart racing with him near her. "You are saying _you_ don't work without me in _your _life. What about me huh? What if I don't work without Adam in my life? What if I don't _want_ to go through life without _him_ in it!"

"Brooke you love me damn it!" He slammed his fist into the wall above her head making her jump. "We both know it! We both know since I have been here thoughts of me, of us have raced through your head just like it has for me. God look how damn jealous you got over me _talking_ to Kimber! I just damn talked to her!"

"You weren't talking to her you were letting her be all over you like some slut!" She yelled slamming her finger in his chest and quickly realized how that did come out jealous…shit.

"Brooke…" He cupped her cheek trying to catch her eyes, "Pretty Girl…"

"Don't," she shoved him back away from her, "Don't do that to me! Don't call me that!"

"Brooke…" He reached for her hand but she slapped it away moving away from the wall to in front of her bed.

"It was supposed to be us!" She yelled at him, "You promised me forever! You promised to love me always!" She screamed digging through her night stand, "I was supposed to have your heart!" She threw his necklace she still had hitting him as he closed his eyes, "You promised me you would never hurt me! 'Pretty Girl give me your heart I won't break it!' Remember saying that to me? Remember repeating over and over again that I was your life, your world! You were supposed to love me!" She cried grabbing a letter from the night stand, "I wrote you! I wrote you every damn day! I called you all the time, wrote a million text and you never did nothing!" She screamed throwing her letters at him.

"Brooke…" His voice cracked as she broke down in front of him.

"I waited for you. I waited for you to call me, to come find me to anything and you didn't! You never even asked me to stay," her shoulders dropped as tears spilled.

"I did too ask you to stay! I begged you not to leave me!" He yelled as she let out a harsh laugh, "I told you I needed you! You left Brooke, you picked up and left and left me to pick up everything by myself!"

"The boy I loved cheated on me!" She yelled, "I needed something more then you just begging me to stay! I needed you to show me, do something to let me know I was it for you. That you would do everything in your power to never hurt me again! I needed that!" She snapped, "You said everything you needed. Well I needed you to love me, to take care of me like you promised and never hurt me! I needed you Lucas and you weren't there! You were off locked away drinking yourself stupid!"

"How was I supposed to know that? How was I supposed to know any of that when you wouldn't talk to me?" He yelled at her throwing his hand in the air.

"Because you cheated on me!" She yelled back.

"Jesus Christ Brooke," he growled moving across the room locking his hand onto the back of her head and slamming his lips into hers. Brooke's hand sliding up to his face as he stumbled back towards the bed, her legs hitting the side making her tumble back and him come down on with her.

Knotting her fist in his hair, his trailed up under the front of her shirt feeling the soft skin underneath and his blood ran hot. Nipping at her bottom lip the familiar feeling bubbled in her as her tongue ran across his bottom lip and pushed inside. A moan escaping her when she felt his hot tongue stroke against hers. She forgot how much she enjoyed kissing him, last night was drunk, she tasted the alcohol but now it was like honey and coffee. A taste she always enjoyed. A taste she always _loved._

Yet then she recalled another taste she enjoyed, a taste of peppermint. A taste that _Adam_ always tasted like because he sucked the candy constantly and her heart stopped.

"Lucas stop…" she pushed her hands to his chest pushing him back slightly.

"No…" he mumbled adding more pressure to the kiss. "Don't run away from me again. You want this, you want me," he reached up cupping her cheek and his long fingers ending on the back of her neck as he tilted her head up to kiss him back. Her caving only a moment before her mind popped back.

"We can't do this," she jerked her head to the side and his dropped to above her shoulder both breathing heavy.

"You love me Brooke," he whispered and she bit down on her knuckle not to cry. "I can tell by the way you kiss me and look at me you still love me."

"Lucas…" she buried her face in his chest feeling his heart as it raced.

"Tell me…" he pulled her back to look at him, his blue eyes locking on her hazel and he saw the love she had. "Tell me you don't love me…" he ordered and her mouth opened to speak yet it shut back quickly. "See…you just have to say it and everything is better. We will figure everything out I promise. Just say you love me."

"I…" her voice cracked as her heart and head started a battle of what she was feeling. "Lucas I…" she glanced away and her heart stopped. "Adam…" her voice cracked at the figure by the door. "No, Adam wait!" She shoved Lucas off her as she dove off the bed.

"Brooke…" he reached for her head but she slapped him away as she ran after him.

"Adam!" she called rushing towards the door right before it slammed in her face, yanking it open and running out.

"What happened?" Rachel asked as Lucas stood in the hall way watching her go.

"I screwed up!" he tossed his hands up. "But that's not new is it?" he let out a harsh laugh going to the backroom and slamming the door. Really needing to get the hell out of there.

_I would've loved you anyway__  
__I'd do it all the same__  
__Not a second I would change__  
__Not a touch that I would trade__  
__Had I known my heart would break__  
__I would've loved you anyway__  
__I would've loved you anyway_


End file.
